The Word On The Street, Part II: Morgan Avenue

Morgan Avenue nys

Taken September 18, 2014.

Urban Artifact: Wish Fulfillment!

CBS screencapSo over the last week we have had:

1. Time Warner employee sex at the Newtown Creek Nature Walk.*

2. Some blue chip public urination at Graham Avenue’s B43 bus stop thrown in for good measure

3. Indecent exposure (as seen at left) on our very Crosstown Local.

Yes, gentle readers, I’d say things are hoppin’.  So much so I lament not seeing my share of the action. Obviously I have been not at the wrong place at the right time. I shared my disappointment with my public urination tipster. To wit, he/she replied:

Awwww Heather. I just know there’s an exposed penis out there for you too. And I bet when you see it, it’ll be the longest one of all. :)

Today it finally happened— in a manner of speaking. Thankfully it did not involve lewd public acts and I actually had the choice of looking— or not. Read on!

371 Stagg Street nys

Ever had the feeling you’re being watched? Today while strolling along Stagg Street I did.

Stagg Street Art Object nys

Sure enough I was right. So help me, but I can swear this fellow was beckoning me to come closer.

Big Head nys

So I did.

Pitching a tent nys

As you can see my new friend is, to use vulgar parlance, “pitching a tent”. Let’s go in!

Little Head nys

What a piece of work is a man! How noble in reason, how infinite in faculty! In form and moving how express and admirable! In action how like an Angel! in apprehension HOW LIKE A GOD!

— William Shakespeare, emphasis mine— Ed. Note.

I can only imagine what the provenance of this item is. A remnant of some hitherto unknown bacchanalian Industrial Business Zone ritual, perhaps?

Heres looking at you kid nys

Here’s looking at you, kid…

Closing on a somewhat related note, your’s truly discovered and acquired a most fascinating product recently. I present without further ado, Peni Fresh!

The FRESHMAKER nys

soapActually I acquired a few bars— much to the amusement of the staff at said deli/grocery. One was a birthday present (said birthday boy was present), the others will be stocking stuffers. The holiday season will be upon us soon enough and let’s face facts: nothing says “Good will toward your fellow man” quite like telling them, however subtly, that they need to wash their tackle. I have yet to discern exactly what is meant by “TUTTI-FRUITTI” flavor. Methinks I’ll leave that task to Ralphie. Those of you who want to upgrade your mere dingus to a dicksicle, methinks I have found the product to make it happen. Cheers!

Peni Fresh: the Freshmaker!

*surveillance footage of which was requested by and is apparently making the rounds through the Newtown Creek Monitoring Committee!

From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: The Word On The Street

Taken by Scoboco.

Quicklink: DNA.info

dnainfoSC

I damned near shot beer out of my nose when I read this corker. I do not think I need to explain why: the first line of this tome pretty much says it all. Nonetheless, I do feel compelled to reiterate the “Schwick” is actually not located in Bushwick. It is in East Williamsburg. It would appear DNA.info is not the only one who has has made note of this.

twitterSc1

twittersc2

 

Uh oh.

twittersc3

OUCH!

But of course we all know the “Bushwick” brand is much edgier— and by “edgier” I mean lucrative. So they’re gonna roll with it. Geography be damned! Hell, if even Vogue has jumped on the Bushwick bandwagon you know someone fearful of Boca Raton will make the journey to north Brooklyn’s “hinterlands”. What’s more, they’ll consider themselves “brave” for having had the experience.

The Shwick: It’s Bushwick, curated, so you do not have to deal with people outside your age group, race or class!

You know, the very folks who made this community worth visiting in the first place. Who wants that?

 

New York Shitty Photo Du Jour: George Street

July 23, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11206, Bushwick, Bushwick Brooklyn 

George Street nys

Taken July 20, 2014.

New York Shitty Street Art Du Jour: East Williamsburg Selections

July 22, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11206, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Street Art 

Enzo and Nio 1 NYS

I Heart NY nys

Lady Liberty NYS

Enzo and Nio Modified NYS

Lion nys

Enzo and Nio 2 nys

New Real Estate Oppportunity nys

Revolution Romance nys

Taken July 22, 2014.

The Word On The Street, Part III: White Street

White Street NYS

Taken July 22, 2014.

The Word On The Street, Part II: A Seigel Street PSA

Seigel Street PSA nys

The visual aides really make this one.

(Taken July 22, 2014.)

East Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: Seigel Street

Dont Get JumpedNYS

I saw a host of these flyers on/around White Street today. Be mindful of your surroundings folks…

The Word On The Street, Part II: Stanwix Street

July 22, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11206, Bushwick, Bushwick Brooklyn, The Word On The Street 

hijo de putaNYS

I am not exactly sure how addressing one’s audience as a son of a whore is going to work, but to each his/her own I suppose…

(Taken July 22, 2014.)