Filed under: 11206, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Feral Furniture
As spied on Boerum Street today, August 29, 2013. Where’s John Cleese when you need him?
Filed under: 11206, 11237, Bushwick, Bushwick Brooklyn, Dung of the Day, Other Shit, Wow
(Or: God Bless the Internet)
That’s right folks, you read the title of this post correctly: “Dung of the Day”. Those of you who have followed New York Shitty for some time are undoubtedly aware that the initial premise of this site was documenting the rather pervasive problem with poop in my community. Over the years I have gone in a different direction. There are two reasons for this:
- As I became more attuned to the issues facing Greenpoint (and north Brooklyn, for that matter) and noticed they were not getting attention via the “mainstream media” I decided that this blog would be an excellent means raising awareness about them.
- I have seen so much magnificent merde— be it human, canine or otherwise— that quite frankly I have become acclimatized to it. I have become a shit snob.
Well, today while walking around Bushwick that changed.
To preface: today I met up with a buddy of mine who resides in the 34th City Council District. This person has been generous enough to save and share the manifold number of Vito Lopez campaign material which has found its way to his/her mailbox. This, of course, includes the infamous example of Team Gropez’s rather interesting use of Photoshop. The “plan” was to take a tour of the 34th and its Industrial Business Zone. Yours truly played “tour guide”. Granted, I do not actually reside in the 34th— but neither does Mr. Lopez for that matter and I digress.
One part of our peregrinations was Melrose Street. There we saw an affordable housing project being built at the behest of the Ridgewood Bushwick Senior Citizens Council. Just a Snapple bottle’s toss away we found something so extraordinary it merited a mention on this blog. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
This is one of two homeless encampments to be found on said street. As you can see, something has gone very wrong.
Unfortunately, I did not have the presence of mind to tote along a tape measure. Thus, I had to repurpose a locally-sourced, gently used bottle of Snapple so as to establish a sense of scale. Regardless, this is rather impressive once one gets past the revulsion/”upchuck” factor. I can assure you, gentle readers, I came to the estimate of 30″ in a very deliberate— if not exactly scientific— fashion. More specifically: when I arrived back at Chez Shitty I ran a Google search for “How tall is a bottle of Snapple?” The following speaks for itself.
But let’s get back to the conclusion on this tale of turdage. My travelling companion and I continued our walk down Melrose. As we did we noticed a number of Maritza Davila posters. That’s when my friend noted:
Too bad you didn’t take that Lopez mailer with you.
My reply was as follows:
Oh, but I did!
Filed under: 11206, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, The Word On The Street
Taken August 29, 2013.
Taken August 29, 2013.
Filed under: 11206, 11211, 11222, 11237, Bushwick, Bushwick Brooklyn, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn
Ever since I have posted the good news about Mr. Gropez’s lack of Photoshop skills (part of which can be seen above), I have been wondering:
Who was the fellow who lost his head?
I suspect my comrade over at the New York Daily News, Celeste Katz, has as well. She writes:
A moustached man with glasses stands between the two in the middle of the original photo…
Well thanks to an anonymous tipster I have ascertained the identity of this fellow… (drum roll please)
Will the Honorable Richard Velasquez, stand up please! Now of course the question (in my mind, anyway) is why Gropez and friends saw fit to remove him. Anyone?
P.S.: You can (and should) see the original New York Daily News article from which I grabbed the above insert by clicking here. Otherwise, you can read the follow-up article wherein Gropez says the Photoshopping is no big deal and he and Hillary are buds by clicking here.
Filed under: 11206, 11211, 11385, Brooklyn, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Ridgewood, Ridgewood Queens, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn
Gropez truly is the gift that keeps on giving. In this case a “birthday card” sent to a woman in the 34th City Council District— a month late. As you can see she has taken this missive in good humor (and context). Vito writes:
I wish that for every extra candle on your cake, you receive an extra reason to smile. Happy Birthday to you!
That “come hither” look and comb-over. Wow, just wow.
Filed under: 11206, 11237, Bushwick, Bushwick Brooklyn, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Ridgewood, Ridgewood Queens
This New York Daily News/campaign literature mash-up was made possible by a resident of Ridgewood. As you can see Mr. Gropez appears to have taken some, um, creative license with the highlighted image. Interesting. In any case, he needs to parlay some of that campaign money and hire a better Photoshop wizard. Bad.
P.S.: Oh yeah, if this fellow is willing to utilize phony photos for the campaign trail, exactly what kind of City Councilman do you think he will be? Just sayin’…
UPDATE, August 4, 2013: The New York Daily News has taken notice of this hilarious item and has a rather nice article about it. You can/should read it here!
UPDATE, August 5, 2013: New York Magazine’s Daily Intelligencer tender it’s two cents;
…New York Shitty suggested the Lopez campaign employ a better Photoshopper. It would also benefit by not retouching photos that appeared in easily Googlable Daily News stories in the first place.
Well said. And last— but hardly least— here’s what Queens Crap has to say:
This guy is either really stupid, or has cojones the size of cantaloupes.
I’d say both— but why split hairs?
Filed under: 11206, 11211, 11222, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Gentrification, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn
Filed under: 11206, 11211, 11237, Bushwick, Bushwick Brooklyn, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn
Filed under: 11206, 11211, 11222, Culture War, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Gentrification, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn
This is a new endeavor by a good friend and all-around very thoughtful fellow named Dennis. Give it a watch— compelling stuff!