Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Presenting The “Four People” Policy

Four People Policy

One has to admire the evocative word-smithing and brutal honesty employed in this missive. I can only imagine the series of events that came to pass so as to require such a policy. I am not sure I want to know. If I ever find my person in need of “work wear”, I am totally taking my business to this establishment. Well done, Zoe’s!

The Word On The Street, Part I: McGuinness Boulevard

McGuinness Boulevard nys

Taken November 3, 2014.

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Halloween Redux

November 1, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, New York City 

Halloween is without argument my favorite day of the year. It is the one day I interface with children in any significant, prolonged manner. I am Auntie Mame for a day! I explained it to one parent of a trick or treater this way (after she admonished her brood to exercise their manners and thank me*):

The pleasure is all mine. I look at it this way:  I get to enjoy all the cute costumes and talk to the kids. In return for this I give them candy. When I am done I go back to enjoying the fact I am NOT a parent. You are the one who has to handle them once they get all hopped up on sweets. I get all of the fun with none of the consequences!

She laughed and wholeheartedly concurred with my analysis.

While the kids I met yesterday were great, the costumes by and large were lacking: most were store bought. There is nothing wrong with this, mind you. I understand many parents do not have the time and/or inclination to DIY it. However, one fellow did— and quite frankly it is one of the most amazing Halloween get-ups I have ever seen.

Here Comes The Garbage Man nys

Behold, a stroller retrofitted into a Sanitation truck replete with logo! The young un’, naturally, is dressed up as one of New York’s Strongest. Not only is this one of the most imaginative “costumes” I have ever beheld, but I have a confession to make: I harbor a great deal of admiration and respect for our fair city’s Sanitation workers. You know how the adage goes:

It’s a dirty job but someone’s gotta do it.

Not only is it dirty work, but it also among one of the most dangerous civil service occupations to be had. It is more dangerous than being a police officer or firefighter. Don’t believe me? Click here and read for yourself. In Halloweens past I have beheld a bevy of our Bravest and plenty of petite policemen. Yesterday our Strongest finally got the nod they deserve.

This one’s for you, guys (and ladies)!

*I feel compelled to state for the record that all the kids to whom I gave candy deported themselves nicely. Many “Thank Yous” or— from the more bashful, smiles and nods— were tendered. The only problematic incident came at the behest of a parent. She somehow felt entitled to “select” her toddler’s candy. My educated guess is her selection was for her own delectation. Guess what? Heather don’t play that. 

No, gentle readers, it simply does not work that way. I made this abundantly clear too. More specifically, I replied:

You either take the Baby Ruth bar or you get nothing.

She took it.

UPDATE, 4:24 p.m.: As I have been whiling away this bleak, cold afternoon via housework I mulled over this year’s Halloween experience. In so doing, I had a capital idea. This I pitched to the Mister: he agreed. Next year, there will be a special cache of candy for the parents of:

  1. especially well-behaved/charming children
  2. toddlers who are beginning to get their fatigue-induced. terrible two/threes crankies on.

candyforbigkids

 

Any questions?

 

Urban Artifact: Old School

Halloween eggsNYS

Taken October 31, 2014.

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: Phone Home

Halloweennys

ETnys

Taken October 31, 2014.

Urban Artifact: Jail Bear International Superstar?

(OR: 726 Days & Counting!)

Yes, gentle readers, this would appear to be the case— and right here and now I am going to share the good news!

This morning started off as any other: I get up, put on a pot of coffee and head to the computer. First I check my email, then I check my site. The latter experienced a spike in traffic. I found this rather strange given I have not been blogging much of late. Thus I perused incoming links. It was quickly discerned that one site was responsible for this. Naturally my curiosity got the better of me: I pointed and clicked. I braced myself in anticipation of material of a highly adult nature. It turned out not to be porn. It is infinitely more awesome than that. See for yourselves!

feminaHU

 

It would appear that our very own Jail Bear has merited the attention of a web site in Hungary. Granted, big in Hungary does not an international superstar make— but it is still pretty darned cool. Given I did not have a Hungarian phrasebook handy, I made my way over to Google Translate to see what they had to say about this ad hoc testement to civic pride. The translation is a mite bit obtuse but the essence comes across:

This is a sad teddy bear sitting behind bars in Greenpoint Avenue, Brooklyn, has appeared in the middle of June. The last two months has kultmacivá, followers, Instagramon hundred over the number of images. Nobody knows how he got here. The Bacardi- glass sometimes replacing vizesflaskára Many people are fed maternal feelings for him, while others say straight creepy. “- read the Facebook page to report overseas.

The NewYorkShitty also collected quite a few photos of the sad maciról, who has been held accountable as part of street art and the Bear Jail – that bear jail – dubbed plüssr?l made ??continuously published photos also make it: here you can watch!

Not only did my humble web site merit a link, but a Facebook page pertaining to Hungarian tourism is featured as well. Fascinating.

In any case, I suspect I speak for a number of Jail Bear’s fans when I write that he is not creepy— at least not in comparison to other things to be found hereabouts. On a number of occasions I have seen parents headed to nearby WNYC Transmitter Park stop so their children can say “Hi” to him and/or tell him about his/her day. He dutifully listens too.

For the above-stated reason I have a very hard time believing Jail Bear is sad. He’s quite beloved. Nonetheless, I decided to take up this matter directly with Jail Bear. The scene which awaited me this morning was quite surprising.

partytime

Jail Bear not only seems to be taking his fifteen minutes of fame in stride, but he is actually quite happy!

jailbear

What’s more, he has something to say to his new friends— and hopefully fans— in Hungary!

greetings

Okay, I’ll admit it: I dressed up Jail Bear and made the sign. But as I told a passerby (after explaining Jail Bear’s newfound celebrity status), I did so— and I quote:

in the interest of fostering positive international relations.

He found this to be a kind gesture. Taylor Swift may the the official face of tourism in New York City, but in Greenpoint (or at least the corner of Franklin Street and Greenpoint Avenue) this sinecure belongs to Jail Bear. In closing, I feel compelled to note that I have never met a Hungarian, much less a Hungarian tourist. Not only does this need to change but I am quite looking forward to the experience…

You didn’t think I was going to pass up an opportunity like this, gentle readers. Really? In all seriousness:

Happy Halloween, Hungary from New York Shitty (and of course, Jail Bear)!

UPDATE, 2:37 p.m.: it has been brought to my attention that the fellow responsible for this bear’s incarceration prefers the moniker “Prison Bear”. So there have you!

P.S.: An interesting fact learned today: if one ever finds him or herself in the highly unlikely predicament of needing an empty liquor bottle on the fly, check out the planters outside of WNYC Transmitter Park. You can rest assured they will deliver!

thumbsup

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: The Word On The Street

ManaNYS

Manhattan Avenue 10212014 nys

Taken October 21, 2014.

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: The Word On The Street

Anything Possible nys

Taken October 19, 2014.

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Coming To 214 Franklin Street…

October 19, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11222, Fuck This Shit, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

gptavetourists

Those of you who cannot get enough folks traversing our sidewalks and subways sporting luggage— or watering holes on Franklin Street, listen up. I have some news which will undoubtedly please you! A person we’ll call “C” writes (in an email entitled “New Hotel On Freeman @ Green Street”) simply:

http://a810-bisweb.nyc.gov/bisweb/JobsQueryByNumberServlet?requestid=2&passjobnumber=320576925&passdocnumber=03

Naturally my curiosity was piqued (Freeman Street does not cross Green Street, no doubt a typo on “C’s” part) so click on the above link I did. Follows is what I found awaiting my delectation.

permit 1

permit 2

permit 3

permit 4

As you can see, gentle readers, this plan was approved just over ten months ago. I would be remiss if I did not point out that it is the handiwork of north Brooklyn’s good friend, none other than Robert Scarano. Well, he did not file the permit. We all know this fellow, a poster child for the ethically-challenged, is not allowed to do so. If my memory serves me correctly it had to do with a little latitude/liberties he took on Freeman Street? Why yes, that was it!

214 franklin 10192014

First it was the Box House Hotel. Then it was the Henry Norman. Both of these displaced local, small businesses. Now we have this one which not only does that but is taking out residential space to boot. In a community whose rental market is already “tight” enough as is. Straight up folks: enough is enough. We need more housing— and truly affordable housing at that— for New Yorkers. Not another hotel.

From The New York Shitty Inbox, Part II: And Now A Word From NAG

NAG email NYS

New York Shitty Analysis: Apparently getting busted for operating an illegal waste handling station in Greenpoint and lying to the Business Integrity Commission does not preclude one from receiving honors from “Neighbors Allied For Good Growth” (formerly known as Neighbors Against Garbage”).

You can’t make this stuff up, folks…