Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Waiting For The Sun

March 23, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

From Manhattan Avenue.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Something Dirty!

March 23, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Last weekend it was the Treasure Chest, this upcoming weekend Kill Devil Hill will be hosting two days of artistic goodness. Rebecca writes:

Hi Miss Heather,

I’m writing to you because I’ve been an avid reader of your blog for a couple of years now and wanted to let you know about an art show I have coming up in your favorite Greenpoint shop. It’s at Kill Devil Hillno furry, toothy little creatures, though, sorry! (But) I think you will like it, mostly because it includes found ephemera and naked stuff. Anyway, if it looks interesting to you, I would greatly appreciate it if you would consider posting it on the venerable Shitty and coming to see the show.

I will be perfectly honest: I do not like posting event listings. There are a number of sites dedicated to just this purpose and I find it boring. I’d rather be pounding the pavement conversing with my friends and neighbors and getting the “shit” on north Brooklyn. There is plenty shit to be had here, I assure you. My inbox overflows with shit on a daily basis. And I cannot afford to hire an intern. So it goes.

However, I can and will do so when it involves furry critters in need or the mood suits me. In the latter-most case being promised “naked stuff” and the following helps. A LOT:

…Found photos, pin-ups & male “physique” magazines.

The previous pretty much constitutes what I have painstakingly arranged on Chez Shitty’s refrigerator over the last five years. The purpose of this exercise is to skeeve the Mister. It works: he puts magnets over what bothers him. I remove them.

They say marriage is an institution. There is a germ of truth to this age-old shtick. I am the R.P. McMurphy of this household: a vortex of chaos and intransigence disrupting his (otherwise) highly structured and organized existence. It’s a fun, if occasionally weird, journey and I can’t honestly say I regret it. But back to nekkid people:

Dirty Lines
March 27, 2010; 12:00 p.m. – 10:00 p.m.
March 28, 2010; 12:00 p.m. – 5:00 p.m.
Opening Reception: March 27, 2010; 5:00 p.m.
Kill Devil Hill
170 Franklin Street
Brooklyn, New York 11222

Check it out!

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Starter: Bows & Bones

From Meeker Avenue.

Miss Heather

LAST GASP: Got Rats?

If so, someone would very much like to talk to you. “Associate Producer” writes:

I’m not sure whether or not this would be the kind of thing (it most assuredly is— Ed. Note) that would be of interest to you or your readers, but it’s certainly a city-wide issue, so I wonder if you can help.

I’m part of a team producing a new documentary series on the city’s by-now colossal rat population – outnumbering humans in NY 12-to-1 by some estimates.  We’re going to be following a team of exterminators as they set about ridding a range of homes and businesses throughout the 5 boroughs of rat infestations…

We’re keen to hear from anyone who is suffering from this menace.

Thanks!

Here’s the dealio: if you want to share your Rattus norvegicus experiences (or simply want to learn more about this project) you should shoot an email to:  sciencetvshow (at) gmail (dot) com

Not only is your confidentiality ensured, but they’ll set you up with an accredited local pest control company that will tackle your rat problem FOR FREE. Yes, I just wrote F-R-E-E!

Get cracking Greenburgers, Bushwickers and Long Island Cityslickers!

Miss Heather

A Self-Congratulatory Post

March 22, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Before I proceed I want to make it known that I am not terribly keen on blogging my achievements. It may sound strange to some of you but I’m a pretty private person. What’s more, I am the classic example of an underachiever, ergo; I do not have much to crow about in the first place. However, in this case I am going to make an exception. If for no other reason because it will serve as a pretext for me to share with you, dear readers, some very exciting news I learned today.

When I received my Greenpoint shirt from Subtexture I was pretty damned excited. So much so I threw it on top of the shirt I was wearing at the time. I wanted to give it a “field test”. As I had suspected a few problems arose:

1. The shirt was too long.

2. I hated the sleeves.
3. While pretty nifty in its own right, this piece of apparel needed some additional fabulousness befitting a real housewife of King’s County.

As I was working at the junk shop I pondered ways to address the aforementioned issues. The sleeves would have to go, I decided. That is easy enough to remedy. I have been altering my clothing for a long time. But what about points #2 and #3? Simply hemming it would not look right. Then inspiration struck. I confided my plan to my co-worker, Laura. She replied:

You are not really going to do that, are you?

You bet your ass I am!

I replied. And this weekend I did.

I am not a patient person. Anyone who knows me well will tell you this. For this reason I want to congratulate myself on this (albeit meager) accomplishment. I would also be remiss if I didn’t mention that quaffing Patron Silver assisted me tremendously with this endeavor. It did. Especially in light of the “help” I received from a few of the Chez Shitty furkids.

See the beads? I’ll give you three guesses where they were when I came back from using the bathroom.

More “help”. Those of you who are not familiar with the manifold joys of pet ownership I am going to share a little known fact: if you have an article of black clothing it is a magnet for any NON-black cats in your household. I do not think I have to explain the reason for this. In closing (and getting back to the real purpose of this post) I would like to share the very special news I hinted at in the beginning of this post. I have been told by the creator of this shirt that they are proving to be big seller with the employees of our beloved Eighth Wonder of the World.

Shit Tit Pride: it’s contagious!

Miss Heather

UPDATE, 4:06 p.m.: I have brought my handiwork to the attention of this shirt’s designer. Here’s what he had to say:

holy shit tits!!! amazing! you’ll be getting orders to do custom work

Coming To Mediterranean Shawarma: Outdoor Dining & More!

March 22, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Although today’s weather is not really conducive to such niceties, I feel compelled to pass along this choice bit of Greenpoint goodness. Mediterranean Shawarma will soon be offering outdoor seating and, for those so inclined, hookahs!

Mediterranean Shawarma
849 Manhattan Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11222

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Fashion Watch: Pirates Of The Crosstown Local

Never seen a pair of gold leather pantaloons before? Well, now you have.

Miss Heather

P.S.: The front of this get-up was quite impressive. Unfortunately I was too preoccupied with WTF factor to have the presence of mind to shoot it. Let’s just say I was not prepared to see this at 1:30 on a drizzly, dreary Monday afternoon. Next time I’ll be ready.

Quicklink: Greenpointers & Williamsburgers For Google Fiber Optic

This item comes courtesy of the Mister. He requested that I post it. This is something I will gladly do given how piss poor the information super highway is hereabouts. Quite frankly I find it appalling given the number of people (myself included) who rely on the Internet for their livelihood. For more information about our community’s bid to have Google give us the gift of broadband (and thus usher north Brooklyn into something resembling the 21st Century) click here. ASAP. The deadline is March 26!

Miss Heather

P.S.: Some of you might be interested to know our Assemblyman, Joe Lentol, is assisting with the application process. What he needs is a show of support from the community. Perhaps you?

LAST GASP: After Dark

March 21, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

From Manhattan Avenue.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Street Art Du Jour: Annunciation

March 21, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Street Art 

From Franklin Street.

Miss Heather