Greenpoint’s Newest Hostel!

July 13, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

6668claystreet11222

Anonymous writes:

Hi Heather

My Dad and his partner live around the corner from me. on Clay St, a few doors down from 66 Clay St (the former methadone clinic) which somehow overnight has turned into a $20 a night hostel .

Dad tells me that in the past week, there has been anywhere from 10-20; what appear to be teenagers milling around the front of the building and on a picnic bench in the parking lot, smoking cigarettes, drinking beer, playing techno music dancing, having a general good time. Which no one should have a problem with, except the party doesn’t start until after 1AM and goes until sunrise

I’m going to try and spend a nice relaxing evening at Dad’s tonight in a bit of a stakeout to see if his complaints are valid

Ill keep you posted

What/if anything do you know about Marzili Hostel at 66 Clay St???

Hope you’re feeling better.

I’m operating at 90%, Anonymous (I’ll spare you the details about the other ten). Let’s start with what you have given me.

hostelscentralNYS

A web site purporting the “Marzilli” Hostel. (Click on the above image to enjoy the true hilarity).

C of O 6668 Clay street

Here’s the only Certificate of Occupancy on file. A residence for the mentally ill (a nice way of saying it was a methadone clinic). Which was , most assuredly, what it was.

Here’s what I saw today.

tent

Some dude hanging out under a tent.

As to who owns this property. That’s where it gets fun! Per ACRIS:

ACRIS1NYS

The log-tossing goes on and on. My money is on Max Stark.

The person who gave the Garden Spot the gift that keeps on giving: the Greenpoint Hotel— a flophouse pretending to be a bed and breakfast. (Click on the previous link, it’s a pisser!)

The person who gives us 239 Banker Street: a hotel being utilized as luxury apartments, e.g.; The Sweater Lofts. STOP WORK ORDERS BE DAMNED! Since when have, and I quote:

New kitchens and bathrooms

Stainless steel appliances

HUGE awesome roof with views

MANY LAYOUTS TO CHOOSE FROM!

the previous amenities had anything to do with a “hotel”?

SWOnys

Your eyes are not deceiving you: this property has 46 “DOB” violations, 36 open, 42 “ECB” violations 34 of which are still open and a STOP WORK ORDER. Unpaid penalties and non-compliance. And yet they advertise.

239banker

Why not call the person responsible for this advertisement, Liz, and ask her? It’s pretty clear the Department of Buildings is unwilling or unable to do anything.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: They’re BAAACK!

July 6, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Tony (who took the following photographs) writes:

I saw those IDT energy scammers in my hood again. It’s because I heard a lady screaming that got my attention, telling these two guys to get the hell out of her building. I took some pictures as they left 66 Driggs today at 2pm. Watch out!

66driggs1

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To read a true tale of woe about this organization’s tactics click here.

Miss Heather

HEADS UP!

May 1, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

idtworker

IDT Energy is canvassing Greenpoint today in search of more victims clients. I caught the above gentleman attempting to swindle a woman at 12:21 p.m. on Green Street. Those of you who are approached by these people take note: they are NOT employees of Con Edison. They will NOT save you money. They want to rip you off and will use deceptive sales practices to do it. To learn more about what IDT and other so-called “energy providers” are up to click here.

Miss Heather

To Whom It May Concern On Green Street

car3

If you are the owner of this Honda.

car1

And are wondering why your roof is crushed in.

car2

It’s because the following two fucked-up hipsters decided to make out on your motor vehicle. It must have been a magical moment (or they simply hate imported cars) because our love birds also elected to jump up and down on it as well.

Repeatedly.

At 4:00 this morning.

Miss Heather

The Kent Street Cat

February 28, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11222, Crazy Cat Lady, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

kentstcatThis cat (which graces the north-facing wall of The Garden) has been around as long as I can remember. I have noticed all other graffiti that has found its way to this edifice has been removed— but not this kitty. I have long intended to get the story behind this fetching feline. Last night I finally did.

Faced with the prospect of having to eat a jarring combination of (questionably edible) foodstuffs for dinner the Mister and I patronized The Garden. As luck would have it, I recognized one of the owners of this establishment. He was engaged in a conversation with another gentleman but having at long last the opportunity to shed light on this mystery I politely interrupted.

Miss Heather: Pardon me for butting in but aren’t you the owner of this establishment?

Owner: Yes, I am one of them.

Miss Heather: I have a very strange question for you. I took it up with Magda (an employee of The Garden, wonderful woman) as I know she has been working here for some time but she didn’t know…

Owner: (getting curious)

Miss Heather: What’s the deal with the cat on your building? The black cat.

After some thought (and some more Q & A) I got an answer. Here it is, albeit in highly simplified form:

  1. Approximately 8-9 years ago someone spray-painted this piece of graffiti onto The Garden.
  2. The owner liked it so much he didn’t see fit to remove it.
  3. However, the owner of the building didn’t agree, so…
  4. five years ago he asked someone to cover it up with primer.
  5. When the person with the primer showed up this gentleman (who the owner of The Garden described as being a “cat person”) had changed his mind. He had grown attached to it.

And so it has remained on Kent Street ever since. I have no idea what the person responsible for this was thinking when he (or she) created this cat. Was his intent vandalism or art? I don’t know and quite frankly I am comfortable with not knowing. It has since become a beloved member of the community and I suspect I speak for many when I say I hope he (or she) stays with us for a very, very long time!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Gentrification Watch: Welcome To The 1970s

January 20, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11222, Criminal Activity, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

indiast1

indiast2

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indiast4

burnedoutcar

Yes sir, that waterfront rezoning has kicked gentrification in Greenpoint into overdrive. Why, just a few years ago we couldn’t afford spray paint to tag our burned out cars.

Anyone care to guess how long this hilarious item will remain on India Street? From the look of things I’d say this carbecque has been sitting here for at least 48 hours.

Miss Heather

Joe Lentol Is On IDT Energy

December 24, 2008 ·
Filed under: 11222, Asshole, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Here’s a fact sheet courtesy of Concerned Citizens of Greenwood Heights.

Learn it, live it, love it— or get screwed. The choice is yours.

Miss Heather

Halloween In Greenpoint

November 1, 2008 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Yesterday I had the pleasure dispensing fistfuls of teeth-rotting goodness to children of all ages at the junk shop. The zeal with which I took to executing this task seemed to surprise Larry da Junkman:

That’s really cute.

Me: What?
Larry: You handing out candy. You really like doing this, don’t you?
Me: Of course I do. It’s HALLOWEEN!

Who couldn’t enjoy giving the gift of refined sugar to a Jedi master as sweet as this one?

I like to call this guy “Chicken Little”.

This little Lion King’s make-up got a little discombobulated in transit.

No worries, mom repainted his whiskers and he was good as new! A curious dialog came to pass when I asked this little guy’s parents if I could take his picture.

Father: Are you going to put this online?
Me: Maybe. Probably on flickr.
Father: Do you have a web site?
Me: Yes.
Mother: Is it New York Shitty?
Me: Well actually it is.
Mother: You’re the lady who takes all the pictures!
Me: Whew! I was expecting you to say something a lot worse!

The above two photographs do not do this little fella justice. He was heart-wrenchingly adorable! But Halloween is not just about cherubic faced young ‘uns.

As you can see the guys at Papacitos* got into the Halloween spirit! The above gentleman gyrated for a good 20-30 seconds while exclaiming:

Can you see my junk?

I told him “yes” and gave him a lollipop. Very few things have the power to truly shock me anymore; this is because I was once a civil servant. That said, bipeds were not the only creatures wearing costumes today.

This poodle sported her finest fettle for the occasion.

And I even made the acquaintance of a pirate pup!

As I was handing out candy a woman I know, a bona fide Greenpoint old-timer, pulled me aside and said:

You realize a lot of these people (I was giving candy to) do not live here.

I had honestly not given the matter any thought. This is probably because I do not care.

Halloween is about dressing up, flauting the drudgery and conventions of everyday life and having fun. It is very much a collective experience¬† —not unlike Christmas or New Year’s Eve. It is— in its strange way— about sharing. I am not going to ask for proof of residency before doling out lollipops or Hershey’s Kisses to children. There was more than enough confectioneries and fun to go around. For everyone.**

I suppose this makes me a candy-giving Commie —or a lollipop pimping populist.

Make that a newly zombified lollipop pandering populist —or carnivorous Commie!

BRAINS!!!

Miss “Living Undead” Heather

P.S.: You can see more pix of Halloween on Manhattan Avenue by clicking here.

*Who have made themselves near and dear to my heart by serving up vegan breakfast tacos. Thanks guys!

**Save a CONSTRUCTION WORKER from (where else?) the Viridian who snatched a lollipop from my tray without asking and then proceeded to laugh about it with his cronies (one of whom said “Hey lady, can I suck on a lollipop?”). This chap, dear readers, was a certifiable grade “A” ASSHOLE. The least this man could have done is ASKED FIRST —but I suppose he felt “entitled” to it. Clearly he was not taught good manners like the following child (I gave a heaping helping of candy to today):

Child #1 (after I gave him a fistful of candy): I want a Hershey’s Kiss.
Child #2: You shouldn’t tell people what you want. It’s not very nice.
Miss Heather (to child #2): You my friend have very good manners. For this reason you are getting a Hershey’s kiss.

Kindness and civility go a long way folks. Or at the very least you can show me your “junk” when pandering for junk food. Grabbing shit off my candy tray is just plain RUDE.

Halloween Photos du Jour: Finally!

October 22, 2008 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

After getting off to late start I am pleased to announce that 97 Russell Street is getting down to some serious Halloween business! What’s more I got to meet the woman behind some of this madness (she was waiting for her husband to arrive with a lift so they could hoist a ghost onto their tree) and get the 411 as to what is going on.

Apparently the reason they got off to a late start this year (the left-hand side of the yard was still incomplete as of today) was because she went on a trip to Egypt (!) and her hubby didn’t where she had stashed all the Halloween goodness!

Once the aerosol foam insulation dries on this bad boy he’ll be brandishing a meat cleaver! YAY!

This cute little witch holds court with her retinue of ghosts above the front door…

right next to this rather nasty looking fella.

Scaryass clown? Check.

Wraith and an organ? Check.

These skulls on a pike come from Long Island!

I can hardly wait to see what this looks like once they fire up the smoke machine. (YES, they’re going to have one!)

Last week I learned from their neighbors over on Humboldt that there is some long-standing friendly competition between brains behind the Humboldt Hurler and the folks at 97 Russell. As a matter of fact, their properties abut each other —enabling them to keep careful track of each others progress. It’s all in good fun though. The incredibly kind woman at 97 Russell told me today with a hint of pride that their house and 648 Humboldt were featured in the New York Daily News last year. This came to pass because her daughter happens to be a reporter for this publication.

Now that’s what I call an inside scoop!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Fashion Watch

The last twenty four hours my inbox has been abuzz with fashion. More specifically the stylings of a certain physician whose office is on Greenpoint Avenue between Manhattan Avenue and Franklin Street.

Bitchcakes writes:

Walking up Greenpoint Ave yesterday (from Franklin going towards Manhattan Ave), Matt and I noticed this advertisement in a window (attached). It was just screaming your name, so I had to make sure you saw it.

Mike writes:

My name is Mike, I’m one of the writers of the NAG blog– thanks for the bloggy love- we got a lot of hits from you.

This isn’t NAG blog material, but totally up your alley…

The attached picture is of a poster is in one of the newly-renovated buildings on the south side of Greenpoint Ave b/t Manhattan and Franklin. Everything about it says “please don’t let this man touch your privates, even in a medical context.”

What is all the Garden Spot fuss about, you ask?

This guy.

Nice bow tie.

Miss Heather

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