Greenpoint
Cafe Cito Bogota
Great Moments In Abjectecture: It Came From Clinton Hill
I live in north Brooklyn. If that alone isn’t enough “street cred” to assess ugly buildings here’s something else.
I have watched this abomination of a “modification” blossom on Broadway. This building was once was exactly like its friend to your left. No more. Don’t believe me? Click here and see for yourself.
Which brings me to the purpose of this post. I have often asked myself:
What would happen if a balconized piece of abjectecture was “upzoned” thus further crappified?
Yesterday, dear readers, I got my answer. And it came from Clinton Hill:
THIS.
It hails from Lexington Avenue— and while more diminutive in stature than most of its craptastic brethren— I can honestly say it is one of the most hideous buildings I have ever seen. Given where I live (Greenpoint) that’s really saying something. It’s like they made it up as they went along. And, in all likelihood, they probably did.
Miss Heather
P.S.: Note how the “keystones” are carried over to the addition. Classy.
Obamarama: Yes We Did!
Sure the election is over but there’s still plenty of Barack goodness to go around. Here are a few of my favorite bits of Obamarama from Brooklyn and beyond!
Washington Avenue, Brooklyn.
Clifton Place, Brooklyn.
Grattan Street, Brooklyn.
North 4th Street, Brooklyn.
Chicago, Illinois.
Those of you who like the “FIRST” posters can order one by clicking here.
Miss Heather
Photo Credits: Chi-town pix, Mr. Heather
Brooklyn Boobification Photos du Jour: Navy Yard Style
Today I decided on a lark to knock around the Brooklyn Navy Yard. Sensing that there may be opportunities for boobification present at this location I packed the girls and hit the road. My instincts were on target.
Steuben Playground
Nestled next to the BQE between Flushing Avenue and (what else?) Steuben Street this park is named after a Prussian army officer and who was a general in the American Revolution: Baron Friedrich Wilhelm Ludolf Gerhard Augustus von Steuben. He made a number of contributions to the Continental Army but follows (courtesy of US History dot org) is my personal favorite:
Another program developed by Steuben was camp sanitation. He established a standards of sanitation and camp layouts that would still be standard a century and a half later. There had previously been no set arrangement of tents and huts. Men relieved themselves where they wished and when an animal died, it was stripped of its meat and the rest was left to rot where it lay. Stueben laid out a plan to have rows for command, officers and enlisted men. Kitchens and latrines were on opposite sides of the camp, with latrines on the downhill side. There was the familiar arrangement of company and regimental streets.
I know what you’re thinking:
If this man advanced what it is now known as the “don’t shit where you eat” policy, why are there two boars gracing the park which bears his name?
Here’s the answer per the New York City Parks Department:
In 2000, Steuben Playground underwent a comprehensive $938,000 reconstruction funded by Council Member Mary Pinkett. The improvements included the replacement of an asphalt ballfield with picnic tables and a horticultural area. The park’s open grass area was landscaped, the handball wall and court were reconstructed, new basketball backstops were added, and new exercise equipment was installed. In addition to the two new pieces of boar-shaped animal play sculptures, a new steel fence was added around the jogging area, new concrete game tables were installed, and two animal art sculptures of boars were added. The wild boar, native to Europe, is a reminder of the foreign origins of a great American military leader.
For the record these boars already have teats (go and see for yourself). But for $938,000 they didn’t seem “grand enough” so I augmented them. The cost: $0.00.
Hall Street at Park Avenue
All things considered there wasn’t too much that tickled my titular fancy. However, this bus shelter for the B61 made the grade.
This Bebe advertisement has been getting on my nerves for some time. So I finally decided to boobify this fine specimen gracing a B61 bus stop next to the BQE. My act of art-making was met with the approval of a young man shooting hoops at adjacent Washington Hall Park: he gave me two enthusiastic thumbs up.
Washington Hall Park
When all else fails playgrounds never cease to provide ample fodder for boobification. Just take this seal. Methinks I will have to swing by here next summer with a retrofitted solo tit and get some lactation going.
Unbeknownst to me a parks employee watched me execute this one. He didn’t seem upset in the least. In fact I think he found it amusing.
And this, dear readers, concludes my latest installment of Brooklyn boobification!
Miss Heather
NYS Flickr Pool
