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Cafe Cito Bogota
Word Of The Day: Clusterfuck
Filed under: Manhattan
Per Urban Dictionary:
Traditionally/originally of military origin.
Today, however, “clusterfuck” is commonly used to descriptively generalize any situation with a large scale of disarray.
possibly synonyms: mess, disaster
1. “Well, that concert was a clusterfuck.”
2. “Did you see the clusterfuck of a traffic jam on Main St.?”
3. “That house party turned into a giant clusterfuck once those cops showed up!”
4. See: East 3 Street between Avenue A and Avenue B.
I have a confession to make: inasmuch as I hate bicycles (or after the local entrepreneurs thieves get to them: carcasses of bicycles) piled chock-a-block on street signs I rather like this.
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Day Starter: Change You Can Believe In
Last night the Mister and I entertained a visiting friend in the East Village. One of the stops on our itinerary was the San Loco on Avenue A, as one of my best friends, Rachael, was scheduled to bar tend there. San Loco means “saint crazy” in Spanish; this is rather apropos given Rachael usually works the closing shift and as a result interfaces with— how should I say— the more eccentric elements to be found in the East Village. Whenever we meet up she always has a “goodie bag” of stuff she has collected and many a good story to tell.
This evening was no exception— what’s more I learned about a previously unknown candidate in the Mayoral race: Albert Duffy.
But he prefers to be called the “Bloomberg Bomb”. I think. It’s sort of hard to tell:
As your mayor, I will always protect my constituent’s like all like all N.Y.C. BOROUGH presidents, Council members and LAW MAKER’s. Who all have thier (sic) hands DEEP in my POCKETS. Me and my “bluBillion Dollar Blue Boys “own and control ALBANY and will continue to manipulate, ABUSE and DEMORALIZE every sector of society. Especially the personnel of the FDNY/NYPD. Call me a “Bloomberg BOMB”!…
On the other side of this flier (both of which can be seen in larger format by clicking on the the above or following image) is a tome entitled “If I Were Mayor of New York City”) which outlines Mr. Duffy’s/The New American Freedom Party Are all mentally ill’s platform for reform.
My favorite passages are as follows:
We would organize a committee to amend the Constitution to reward anyone who gives back to our country by joining our military. We would guarantee that if anyone dedicates themselves for the safety and protection of our freedom, and becomes disabled, all their needs will be taken care of. Like free medical/hospitalization, employment training, job placement opportunities, adequate housing and free public transportation.
It would appear that this chap has not heard of the Veteran’s Association. Then again, maybe he has: it’s not like they have gotten much positive publicity of late. As for the matter of public transportation, our mayoral aspirant has some rather interesting ideas on that front:
We would organize a committee to design and construct a (free) Monorail System that will replace the old failing system that we presently depend upon.
And lastly, the coup de grâce:
We would organize a committee to amend smoker’s rights and designate smoking areas in all NYC Irish Pubs, Taverns and Restaurants. (Ed. Note: emphasis mine)Â If you don’t like it? Go outside.
If this sounds like the kind of change you want to see in our fair city come November, dear readers, you should note that Mr. Duffy was thoughtful enough to provide a bank account number for interested donors at the end of his mission statement. The more eagle-eyed among you might have also noticed that this is “Part 1″ of his xerographic campaign for mayor. This would suggest there will be a “Part 2″ and maybe even a “Part 3″.
I can hardly wait.
Miss Heather
Manhattan Photos Du Jour: Day Trip Diary
As I have mentioned previously the Mister has taken two weeks vacation. Yesterday we went to the birthplace of Theodore Roosevelt. This is not my idea of how to celebrate one’s birthday but then again it wasn’t my birthday that was being celebrated. Anyhoo, afterward we proceeded to walk to Chinatown. Follows is a slide show featuring some highlights from our walk. Enjoy!
Anybody out there know who this guy is? I ask because finding myself between him and a horde of very excited teenage girls (and one older gentleman wearing bermuda shorts) was mildly terrifying.
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Day Starter: Summer Love
Filed under: 11211, 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Manhattan, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn
East 20 Street, Manhattan, 10010
North 1 Street, Brooklyn, 11211
Leonard Street, Brooklyn, 11222
Miss Heather
East Village Street Art Du Jour: Rats With Wings
From East 11 Street.
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Day Starter: Good Morning!
Filed under: Manhattan
From East 6 Street.
Miss Heather
East Village Street Art Du Jour: Old School
From East 6 Street.
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Photo Du Jour: Mother Love
Filed under: Manhattan
From First Avenue in the East Village.
Miss Heather
P.S.: Special thanks go out to the Mister for fixing my most vexatious PhotoShop problem!
Great Moments In Real Estate Advertising: Full Disclosure
Filed under: Manhattan
It doesn’t get any more upfront than this! This wonderful advertisement hails from the Bowery and was captured by Dale Harris. Speaking as someone who has dealt with her fair share of crazy landlords, someone could make a fortune manufacturing these signs. Just fill in the blanks.
Great find, Dale!
Miss Heather
LAST GASP: Better Late Than Never
When I saw this item via orangegenius I simply had to pass it along here on New York Shitty. This has nothing to do with me me being a romantic at heart; I’m not. I’m about as romantic as a turd in a swimming pool. But if anyone would ever bother to ask the turd in the swimming pool— not all the troublesome fellow bathers— if he (or she) was happy I’d wager he or she would enthusiastically answer:
Yes!
It is in the interest of some faceless, nameless person’s happiness (or at least a first date/one night stand) that I have elected to post the above missive. It hails from the Manhattan entrance of the pedestrian walkway of the 59th Street Bridge and reads as follows:
Dog Walker
Please come visit sometimes. I dream about you. I have a letter for you
-the Russian Girl.
P.S. I love you but I am very shy
Sadly this was written over a month ago (April 28)— but I say better late than never. Let’s make this love connection happen, people! Dog walkers need love too!!!
Miss Heather
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