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A Lesson in Wish Fulfillment…

September 2, 2007 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

and why you should never take a box springs from the street!

Last night my husband and I opted for a late dinner with red wine at the Greenpoint Coffee House. Since it was really nice out, we sat outside. As usual, I positioned myself so I could see the intersection of Green and Franklin Street. I do this so I can “see all the good stuff”. And good stuff I saw.

Box Springs On Green Street

This box springs was sitting at the corner of Franklin and Green Street. I pointed it out to my husband.

Where is it?

he asked. “It’s pretty damned hard to miss.” I said “It’s in the middle of the sidewalk.” After finding it he said:

I wonder why it is there?

“I dunno.” I replied. Does one really need a reason to leave a box springs in the middle of the sidewalk? I think not. “Today is, after all, the first of the month.” I mused to myself.

Earlier I had seen a number of people moving in and out of the neighborhood. On Manhattan Avenue I saw a trust fund chick moving in. Or should I say her parents were unloading her furniture from their SUV as she was yammering away on her cell phone. Conversely, the sheer quantity of painting, objets d’arte and art supplies I found on the sidewalks this morning bore witness that a number of artists had moved out.

This is a when a woman walking a rather large mutt came into view on Franklin. As she was approaching the mattress I said:

I hope that dog pisses on that box springs.

And he did.

Golden Showers for Golden Slumber

The End.

Miss Heather

Business as Usual at 154 West Street

September 1, 2007 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

As promised in this post, I decided to swing by 154 West Street this morning and see what’s shaking. True to form, they were busy working*.

Business as usual at 154 West Street

They were even so kind as to obstruct the sidewalk while they were at it.

Obstructed sidewalk at 154 West Street

While I was taking the above photographs a young yuppie father approached with his daughter. She was learning to ride a bike. He was not very happy when he had to advise her to go on the street because the sidewalk was cluttered with the instruments of this contractor’s trade.

I do not think this gent’s anger was the least bit unmerited. It is not unreasonable to expect that the sidewalks be clear for passage. Especially on a weekend. A HOLIDAY WEEKEND, no less. Rather, I find it very unreasonable to obstruct a sidewalk with a miter and table saw while doing weekend construction without a variance.


These are the permits posted at this site. Two are for construction, the third (at the bottom) is for electrical work. Nary a permit allowing off-hours work was to be found.

This is easily one of the most in your face examples of the total disregard many contractors (and in all likelihood, the people who hire them) have for the law. Then again, can you honestly blame them? It’s not like the rules established by the Department of Buildings are enforced in any consistent and effective fashion anyway.

And when the cat’s away, the mice will play!

Miss Heather

*At 10:15 a.m.

The Tree Pits of 100 Freeman Street

September 1, 2007 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Ticket, 100 Freeman Street

Earlier this week I found the above citation taped to the front door of 100 Freeman Street. As you can clearly read, a “large accumulation” of garbage was found by the Environmental Control Board and the owner of said property (presumably the American Package Company) was fined accordingly. Or were they?

Since our duly diligent public servants did not specify which tree pit was surrounded by refuse I took pictures of all seven of them. Here they are.

Tree Pit #1

First Tree Pit

Tree Pit #2

Second Tree Pit

Tree Pit #3

Third Tree Pit

Um, here are a few bicycles.

Tree Pit #4

Fourth Tree Pit

Anyone out there finding any bottle(s), cigarette pack, newspaper(s), etc? If so, you’re probably eagle-eyed enough to work for the E.C.B. All I have seen thus far is a bunch of overgrown weeds and some bikes.

Tree Pit #5

Fifth Tree Pit

Still no refuse.

Tree Pit #6

Sixth Tree Pit

A couple more bikes.

Tree Pit #7

Seventh Tree Pit

While I personally find chaining a bike to a tree like this to be obnoxious, let’s stick to the topic at hand: I am still not finding any of the “various debris” cited in the above ticket. In fact, this is probably the cleanest I have ever seen this stretch of sidewalk. It is usually slathered in dog shit.

This of course begs the question as to what the E.C.B. is doing. Or not doing. I think I speak for a number of the people in the Garden Spot when I say a crackdown on illegal and/or after-hours construction would be greatly appreciated. Magic Johnson’s crew over at 110 Green Street were jack-hammering away well past 6:30 p.m. last Tuesday. The noise was quite annoying. Much more so than a few bottle(s), cigarette pack, newspaper(s) and other assorted refuse scattered on a sidewalk.

Priorities, anyone?

Miss Heather


September 1, 2007 ·
Filed under: Area 51, Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

People have different ideas of success. Some consider making ungodly amounts of money as being “successful”. In my opinion, nothing says “you’ve made it” like getting a shout-out from bedbugger.com. And as it would happen, this came to pass yesterday. To celebrate this most auspicious accomplishment, I have tapped into my growing archive of bedbug-related photos and present them here. Enjoy!

May 5, 2006
Location: 97 Green Street

Evil Mattress at 97 Green Street

This is the first bedbug-ridden mattress I photographed. For this reason it will always be a sentimental favorite to yours truly.

June 18, 2007
Location: 66 Greenpoint Avenue

Greenpoint Avenue Mattress

The former owner of this piece of bedding chose to employ wit. That’s the thing about us Greenpointers, we have a very acerbic sense of humor. You pretty much have to nowadays.

July 17, 2007
Location: the vestibule of my apartment building

Bedbug King

Naturally I found this to be a little disquieting. Is the Bedbug King trying to tell me something? I certainly hope not. What does a Bedbug King look like, for that matter? I never, EVER want to find out!

August 8, 2007
Location: 609 Metropolitan Avenue

609 Metropolitan Avenue

This bedbug infested combo hails from Williamsburg. At a distance I thought someone was having furniture delivered to their apartment. Clearly I was wrong.

Across the street from 609 Metropolitan Avenue

I do find it suspect that an exterminator claiming to be a “bed bug specialist” is located right across the street, though.

August 17, 2007
Location: India Street, in front of the Astral Apartments

India Street Sofa

The pouring rain didn’t stop me from documenting this, the latest (but hardly last) victim of the Greenpoint Bedbug Epidemic. This is getting a little too close for comfort.

Ask not for whom the Bedbug King comes, he comes for thee!

Miss Heather