The mattress from this post has gotten a couple of companions. I suppose coal is pretty damned expensive nowadays so maybe Santa decided to give some very naughty Greenpointers the gift that keeps on giving?
My gut instinct tells me there is a story behind this mattress. The rubber glove (in the foreground) suggests it is one I am probably better off not knowing.
MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM NEW YORK SHITTY!
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Ho! Ho! Ho!
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
I don’t know which I want more: this lamp or dainty ankles. I suppose I shouldn’t have taken all those dance lessons. Either way, I adore the person who saw fit to put this in his/her window.
P.S.: For those of you who are unaware, this lamp is a small reproduction of the one featured in this movie. If you have not watched A Christmas Story please do so. When the heater in the basement belches large amounts of smoke into their house take note. When I was a child Pa Heather took the same approach to fixing things: a modicum of knowledge of things mechanical coupled with an advanced command of profanity. Like father, like daughter.
That said, I prefer the segment when Ralphie’s mother entreats his younger brother to eat like a pig. It takes me back to when I was in management.
This one goes out to all the cat fanciers— and if all the clicks I have seen on the “backend” of my blog are any indication— my pal Lisacat has probably been deluged with people interested in adopting Brandy…
and her sister, Alexandra.
Both of these gals had upper respiratory infections when the above photos were taken. They have since recovered and are almost ready to be adopted.
Those of you who prefer tom cats, meet Gitano and Horatio. They were found in front of a bodega in Bushwick. Horatio is lost one of his rear tootsies, but I can assure you it has not stopped him from being a hooligan. In fact, I have been told he has taken to bullying his brother!
Brooklyn Animal Resource Coalition
253 Wythe Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11211
Why not play Santa this year and give a “throw-away” a home to call his/her own?
Photo Credits: Lisacat, save the festooned lions.
Filed under: Mr. Heather's Kamera Korner
This morning I moderated the following comment regarding this post:
I understand that you are upset. So â€¦if the camera is too much for you to bear, Iâ€™ll happily accept it as a gift. Just tryinâ€™ to help a palâ€¦
Sorry Anulla, I can’t do it. Had I given my camera to you, that would mean once I bounced back from my malaise I would have to take back my old camera from Mr. Heather. Today I bounced back. What’s more, Mr. Heather took his “new” camera with him as he accompanied me on my first “walk” since being hassled by the police last week.
Wanting to make sure my husband wasn’t using his new toy to “case” houses or take salacious pictures of women changing in front of open windows, I looked at what he shot. The following (located on Herbert Street) was my favorite.
I will refrain from criticizing Mr. Heather’s composition. I have two art degrees: he doesn’t.
The same goes for the anatomical knowledge of the person who drew the above image. While lacking ears, the rather lengthy, hairless tail suggests the above animal is a rat. I always thought mice liked cheese, but we’ll let that go.
Hmm. What do labor unions erect in front of buildings that upset them? Wait. Give me a minute… I know this one…
Oh, that sweet Mr. Heather of mine!!! It takes me right back to our wedding day: after getting married at Brooklyn Municipal Hall our best man (who was a woman, our best man was a lesbian— or the other way around) took a picture of us in front a giant scab-busting rat. That was the photo we sent to our respective parents announcing our wedding.
Organized labor, my wedding day and lunch at Fernando’s afterwards…
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Timing has never been my husband’s strong point. Last night he displayed this trait with a little more flair than usual. Upon arriving home, Mr. Heather was in a particularly festive mood:
Open the pocket on my duffle bag
he chirped. After A LOT of prodding, I broke down and opened his bag. What did I find, you ask?
A new camera.
I do not think I need to make light of a recent experience I had involving photography. It has been been splashed all over the Internet. And while some of you out there may agree or disagree with my take on it, I think most of you would understand why things photographic are a very sore subject for me at the moment. My husband was really hurt when I didn’t want to tool around with it. He didn’t understand (for wont of a better way of saying it) that handing me a brand-spanking new camera last night was sort of like giving a book of matches to someone who just been sentenced to twenty years for arson.
The last 24 hours have been spent by yours truly in one or the other of the following moods:
- abject despair
After repeated prodding by my husband this evening we went out to dinner*. I was told to take my new camera with me and try it out. I put it in my purse to humor him. In hindsight I am glad I did because there is a one house Santacon on Huron Street.
I think I counted seven Santas on the premises. I found this interesting as there was only one Mrs. Claus. Kinky.
Here’s a close-up of the big one.
The expression on Joseph’s face is priceless. Maybe he just learned who baby J’s real father is?
Those of you who are have the opportunity and the winter doldrums should head over to Huron Street (between Manhattan Avenue and Franklin Street) and check out this stellar display for yourself. If it gave me a much-needed smile today, you can rest assured it will do the same thing for you.
*in the 90th precinct.
Filed under: 11211, 11222, Bloglodytes, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn
Last night I approved a series of comments regarding my recent interaction with New York’s Finest. Among them was this turd posted by “MASKEDMAN”:
Ahhh Miss Heather
But if your house was broken into by someone who had been casing your neighborhood, so upset you would be at the Police Department for not doing there job.
How you would say they were at a donut shop or such, instead of properly investigating a 911 call of a suspicious person.
You say â€œWas I dressed in a manner that would be construed as menacing? How would the police know that? Because if they thought that, they would be profiling ooohhhh and just think of the story you would have then!!!!
Give the Officers a break really.
To wit I replied:
I have a better idea: they should cut us a break and (as I said in the comment previous to yours) go after real criminals.
It’s easy to criticize when you have not had an experience like mine and I hope you never do. Your cynicism saddens me. Nonetheless, I wish you happy and healthy holiday season.
“MASKEDMAN” got diarrhea of the mouth— or would that be of the keyboard? Either way it is fear-mongering bullshit:
I find it very funny
People riding their bicycles on the sidewalk, people drinking in public. all against the law.
How can you be upset about getting a summons for beaking ther law?
Don’t know if anyone has kids, but have you ever tried to walk on the sidewalk with a stroller while bicycles wiz by you it’s not fun.
Laws are there for a reason, if you want to play, you have to pay my friends.
Oh how everyone would complain if they were sleeping, and some people were outside drinking beers and making noise keeping them up. But I’m sure you weren’t making any noise, right?
Maybe the cops should just do NOTHING.see how you like it then.
Cut you a break for what Miss Heather? Just don’t investigate the complaint. You can’t be serious
Thinking this guy was just some angry jerk-off, I humored him:
If you are going to be abusive, Maskedman I am going to revoke your account. I have gone through enough hell this week. I am the victim in this situation. Not you and certainly not the NYPD. Simple as that.
Here is his piquant reply:
Well Miss Heather, I’m sorry you took me as abusive, I was simply asking a question and not trying to be abusive.
But, if you think that is abuse, NOW I can understand why simple questions by the Police to understand your actions causes you to call the Officer names like Barney Fife. You’re way too sensitive.
By the way, you should really THANK the Police for the job they have done there in the 94 Pct. THEY are the reason you can walk around that precinct looking at decorations, instaed of looking at hookers, pimps and drug dealers (as it was years ago). But instead you get mad at them for simply doing their job.
Victim? Victim of what?
You really have to think about this Miss Heather.
PS Please don’t assume you know me, or know my experiences, as I quote you “when you have not had an experience like mine”. I was pulled over by the Police all the time when I first started driving because I looked so young. They would pull me over, ask me for ID, question me, then send me on my way. I didn’t mind, ya know why? because I wasn’t doing anything wrong, I had NOTHING to worry about and they were just doing their job. Have a very Merry Christmas Miss Heather, and enjoy your New Year.
I did “think” about this. I also looked up “MASKEDMAN’S” I.P. address. Guess what? He and the N.Y.P.D. are one and the same:
Please don’t assume you know me, or know my experiences…
The Preamble to the Bill of Rights
Congress of the United States begun and held at the City of New York, on Wednesday the fourth of March, one thousand seven hundred and eighty nine.
The Conventions of a number of the States, having at the time of their adopting the Constitution, expressed a desire, in order to prevent misconstruction or abuse of its powers, that further declaratory and restrictive clauses should be added: And as extending the ground of public confidence in the Government, will best ensure the beneficent ends of its institution.
RESOLVED by the Senate and House of Representatives of the United States of America, in Congress assembled, two thirds of both Houses concurring, that the following Articles be proposed to the Legislatures of the several States, as amendments to the Constitution of the United States, all, or any of which Articles, when ratified by three fourths of the said Legislatures, to be valid to all intents and purposes, as part of the said Constitution; viz.
ARTICLES in addition to, and Amendment of the Constitution of the United States of America, proposed by Congress, and ratified by the Legislatures of the several States, pursuant to the fifth Article of the original Constitution.
First Amendment: Establishment clause, freedom of religion, speech, and press, and peaceable assembly as well as the right to petition the government. Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
Second Amendment: Right to keep and bear arms. A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.
Third Amendment: Protection from quartering of troops. No Soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the Owner, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law.
Fourth Amendment: Protection from unreasonable search and seizure. The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.
Fifth Amendment: Due process, double jeopardy, self-incrimination, eminent domain. No person shall be held to answer for any capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offence to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.
Sixth Amendment: Trial by jury and other rights of the accused. In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the State and district where in the crime shall have been committed, which district shall have been previously ascertained by law, and to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the Assistance of Counsel for his defense.
Seventh Amendment: Civil trial by jury. In suits at common law, where the value in controversy shall exceed twenty dollars, the right of trial by jury shall be preserved, and no fact tried by a jury, shall be otherwise reexamined in any court of the United States, than according to the rules of the common law.
Eighth Amendment: Prohibition of excessive bail, as well as cruel and unusual punishment. Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted.
Ninth Amendment: Protection of rights not specifically enumerated in the Bill of Rights. The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.
Tenth Amendment: Powers of states and people. The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the states, are reserved to the states respectively, or to the people.
Now that my history lesson is over, I’ll tell you something: I forwarded “MASKEDMAN’s” IP address to a lot of people. Here’s what one anonymous tipster had to say:
Good for you for putting word out.
I think he is probably harmless — the kind of guy who won’t hear anything critical about the police force. Interesting, though, that he is spending considerable amounts of time reading and posting to blogs from his office.
also naming Sara Berger & male colleague (albeit a different one) in NDSS room 701
maybe Sarah and the lads are just “techs.” But the room appears to be the “we watch the internet” room. Who knew?
I guess it’s probable that’s the location of NYPD’s IT and they’re not really in room 701.
It still raises the question of why maskedman isn’t doing some work.
Isn’t it nice to know your tax dollars are paying “MASKEDMAN” to surf the Internet and harass civilians who have the temerity to stand up for themselves? The timing of “MASKEDMAN’s” missives is also interesting: they came to pass after a lot of negative press via the ‘blogosphere’ and on THE SAME DAY Channel 12 contacted the 94 Precinct regarding my “incident”.
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Recently I met with Kate Hammer, a reporter from the New York Times. She was working on an article about bodega cats so I showed her around the neighborhood and introduced her to some of my favorite feline friends. Well, today it went to print and one of Greenpoint’s most beloved kitty cats is prominently featured. Check it out!