Greenpoint
Lorven Pharmacy
Culture on the Cheap
GWAPP Town Hall Meeting
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
I would like to thank any and all New York Shitty readers who slogged through last night’s delightful weather to attend GWAPP’s Town Hall Meeting. I certainly learned a lot and I hope you did as well. In particular, I was pleased as punch to learn that some of the funds from the $50 million gift Michael Bloomberg has given to refurbish the McCarren Park pool will be allocated towards new public lavatories.
That said, I hope those of you came away as interested in the future park space planned for Greenpoint’s waterfront as I was. For those of you who were unable to attend this event, I will be featuring highlights over the next several days so you can get up to speed!
Miss Heather
Bushwick Photo de Jour: Bushwick Avenue
It should be noted that shortly after taking the above photo I found the following anatomical rendering just down the street at on P.S. 147.
And they say our public education system is failing!
Miss Heather
P.S.: Back on Green Street we Greenpointers have taken up animal husbandry.
No wonder parents are wiling to lie, cheat and steal to get into our public schools.
Greenpoint Photo de Jour: Moon Over McGuinness
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
I love this yellow car.
Miss Heather
Great Moments in Crapitecture: 11 Ditmars Street
As I was walking down Broadway yesterday something caught my eye. It’s sheer crapitutude even impressed my jaded eye. Here it is.
Nice fence “Dutchy Construction“! It looks like it was constructed after passing a few “dutchies”. The rope is a nice touch.
Miss Heather
P.S.: Per the Department of Buildings this Bushwick chalet is going to be a two-family building. Um, okay.
Williamsburg Photo du Jour: Cook Street
Filed under: Williamsburg
I found this terrific mural on Cook Street (just east of Graham Avenue) this week.
Why the agricultural imagery you ask? A farmer’s market is conducted on Cook Street between Graham Avenue and Humboldt Street (P.S. 257) from July to October.
When I got home I later I realized the farmer in this mural reminded me of someone. It took me awhile, but I was finally able to figure out who it was: our nation’s fearless leader.
Maybe it is the idiotic look on his face? Or it has something to do with his repeated corn-holing of this country (and our civil rights) for the last seven years?
Miss Heather
Disclaimer: This is satire. No offense is intended towards:
- the participants in
- organizers of
- corn cobs sold at
the Graham Avenue Farmer’s Market.
Recreation, Greenpoint Style
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Yesterday I strolled down McGuinness Boulevard and, true to form, it did not disappoint.
I found this sign posted outside the Pit Stop bar. Keg bouncing: I like the sound of that! If baseball is “America’s Game” and Scotland’s sport of choice is caber tossing, why can’t we Greenpointers enjoy a little keg bouncing? Who knows, it might just catch on! (In any case, it certainly sounds a lot nicer than “pig in the bag“.)
Anyone up for starting a keg bouncing league?
Miss Heather
Great Moments in Construction Safety: Montrose Avenue
When I glanced around the corner (from Bushwick Avenue to Bushwick Place) I suspected something wasn’t right. Upon closer inspection my suspicions were confirmed.
I did not have Hard Hat Hannah at my side (she is convalescing at an undisclosed location— more details to follow), but I know enough to intuit this is not proper construction safety. There were no permits posted, yet I noticed a bit of yellow paper was affixed to the front door. Let’s go in for a closer look, shall we?
It’s a hearing notice from the Department of Buildings! Clearly the owner of this building has taken note.
And has seen fit to continue working.
Miss Heather
Sucko in Stucco
One of the greatest pleasures I derive from New York Shitty is the numerous witty and pithy comments I have the pleasure of moderating. This is because I envision his web site as being a two-way street. Its purpose is not solely to toss out missives into the abyss of the Internet; rather, I want people (be they Greenpointers or otherwise) to communicate. With each other and me.
That said, a commenter named “Rexlic” recently reminded me of a wonderful movie by the Marx Brothers called Cocoanuts. For those of you who are not familiar with this film here is the premise via IMDB:
Mr. Hammer (Groucho Marx —Ed. Note) runs a bankrupt Florida hotel. He’ll try anything to make money, even make love to rich Mrs. Potter. But his main scheme, selling real estate, is in danger of sabotage from zanies Chico and Harpo, who also reduce the schemes of a pair of jewel thieves to chaos…
The following choice specimens of north Brooklyn stucco abuse (and very bad taste) are dedicated to “Rexlic” and the brothers Marx. First up, check out this beauty on Conselyea Street.
You can have any kind of a home you want. You can even get stucco.
Oh, how you can get stucco.
Representing Greenpoint, we have this beauty on Meeker Avenue!
Those of you who are familiar with this area (Meeker Avenue west of North Henry Street) can attest to the many amenities this location affords:
- Scenic views of the Brooklyn-Queens Expressway.
- UNeasy access to public transportation (unless you like to hitchhike) and other essentials such as grocery stores, laundromats and the like.
- The distinction of living in the most crime-ridden section of the 94th Precinct!
But all the previous are trivialities. Who cares about practicality when he or she can enjoy
…the most exclusive residential district in
FloridaGreenpointEast Williamsburg. Nobody lives there.
Miss Heather
A Sign in the Stuy
Today I am honored to share my very first piece of dog shit signage from none other than Bedford-Stuyvesant! My tipster writes:
I saw this stenciled plea at the corner of Willoughby and Walworth and thought of you.
Unfortunately, as the second pic reveals, the call has gone unheeded (see near green patch, lower left).
Ah well, there’s plenty else to love about Bed Stuy.
Heh.Regards,
Erin
This looks a lot like a series of missives I found inscribed around a tree pit on Franklin Street a couple months ago.
I can attest that (to date) these admonitions appear to be working. Maybe it is the color?
Miss Heather
Miss Heather’s New Pied-a-terre
Filed under: Bushwick
Yesterday we learned how utterly crass real estate marketing can be after taking a sojourn to Central Avenue and Stockholm Street. Perhaps I am simply clueless, but the appeal of bloated McMansions (as either a selling tool or an actual residence) eludes me. In addition to being bereft of any character whatsoever, these edifices are obscene in size— and while this might strike a chord of “luxury” to some, to me it is only that much more square footage for our herd of cats to vomit upon.
As I type away in my little apartment I occasionally lament the total lack of privacy. When I find myself in the position of having to write while the Simpsons (a favorite of Mr. Heather) is being blared at (seemingly) 100 decibels I remind myself of one very important fact: inasmuch as I dislike such “working conditions” there is one thing I despise more. This thing happens to be work. The way I see it, by reducing square footage I have also reduced the number of venues either my husband or our cats can despoil.
Bearing the previous in mind, dear readers, the reasons why I am smitten with the following pied-a-terre (located on Willoughby Avenue), should be self-evident.
First off, it has a rather large front yard.
While modest in size, it is lavishly appointed with those little things that make a house a home:
- Extra storage under the stairs
- A handless mannequin making what appears to be a Nazi salute
- Ghouls hanging from the rafters and most important of all…
Lucy with a brewski.
Who do I make my check out to?
Miss Heather
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