Dung of the Day

August 12, 2006 by
Filed under: Dog Shit, Dung of the Day 

Boy have I been busy!

I have parsed through at least 100 pieces of dog shit this week. Seriously. I have two one Crap Map to construct (the one I just finished can be found here), a shitload of data to sort, and pie charts to create. At least I copped a wine rack, sleeping bag, and lamp from these jaunts as compensation for my efforts.

Despite my ‘shitigue’, I can muster enough just energy to post August 12, 2006’s the Dung of the Day.

I have long hoped for (but never found) dog shit in front of the 94th Precinct Station of the NYPD. I suspect the lack of dog shit there is due to the fact that New York’s Finest are always parked out front (and take smoke breaks there). But tonight I discovered some trampled dog shit across the street (at 88 Meserole Avenue). And for the time being, it will have to do.

88 Meserole Avenue

Otherwise, one gent in Sunset Park has seen fit to link to me on his blog. I am listed as “greenpoint dog shit queen”. I have no problem with this (his blog seems to be a good one) save the fact that I would prefer to be listed as “The Greenpoint dog shit queen”.

To do otherwise would imply that there are other pretenders to my throne and that is simply unacceptable.

Those of you who are familiar with the movie Pink Flamingos know all too well what transpired after Divine received a birthday present (via the USPS) from Connie and Raymond Marble. THE filthiest people alive, THE Greenpoint dog shit queen: in the scheme of things they or more less the same.

I love John Waters.

Mr. Waters, H.L. Mencken and the antics of Spiro Agnew are only the reason(s) why Maryland would/should exist as far as I am concerned.

God bless you, John Waters. Come to Greenpoint, you’ll love it. I’ll be your personal tour guide. Dog shit and all. (Just don’t expect me to eat it.)

Miss Heather


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