February 18, 2007 by
Filed under: Dog Shit, Dung of the Day 

967 Manhattan Avenue

One night I dreamed I was walking along Manhattan Avenue with the Lord. Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the shit. Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, other times there was one only.

This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of footprints, so I said to the Lord,

“You promised me Lord, that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there has only been one set of footprints in the sand. Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?”

The Lord replied, “The years when you have seen only one set of footprints, my child, is when I carried— wait a minute— I just stepped in something. Aw FUCK!!!”

Miss Heather

P.S.: I hate this fucking poem.


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