Anyone Lose A Briefcase?

November 24, 2008 by
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Everyone’s fantasy is to find a briefcase full of money. No strings attached.

When I encountered the above item (at the intersection of Dobbin Street and Norman Avenue) I knew it would not contain money. I know my luck. What’s more, I live in Greenpoint. Nonetheless my curiosity was killing me. I stared at the briefcase wondering what was inside. My post 9/11 self cried:

There might be a bomb in there!

Thankfully my rational side prevailed and I reminded myself:

  1. This briefcase is located in Greenpoint.
  2. Greenpoint is a neighborhood no one (save developers; the various and sundry parasites who shill their interests and the people who actually live here) gives two shits about.
  3. Ergo, it is no one’s interest to blow anything up at the intersection of Norman Avenue and Dobbin Street.

So I said to myself:

Fuck it.

and kicked the damned thing open. Here’s what I found.

If anyone lost a briefcase full of clay this weekend you can find it at the northeastern corner of Norman Avenue and Dobbin Street. Its contents appear to be more or less intact, but who am I to know? I suppose only the owner of this case would know for certain.

Miss Heather


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