Sucko in Stucco

January 16, 2008 by
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

One of the greatest pleasures I derive from New York Shitty is the numerous witty and pithy comments I have the pleasure of moderating. This is because I envision his web site as being a two-way street. Its purpose is not solely to toss out missives into the abyss of the Internet; rather, I want people (be they Greenpointers or otherwise) to communicate. With each other and me.

That said, a commenter named “Rexlic” recently reminded me of a wonderful movie by the Marx Brothers called Cocoanuts. For those of you who are not familiar with this film here is the premise via IMDB:

Mr. Hammer (Groucho Marx —Ed. Note) runs a bankrupt Florida hotel. He’ll try anything to make money, even make love to rich Mrs. Potter. But his main scheme, selling real estate, is in danger of sabotage from zanies Chico and Harpo, who also reduce the schemes of a pair of jewel thieves to chaos…

The following choice specimens of north Brooklyn stucco abuse (and very bad taste) are dedicated to “Rexlic” and the brothers Marx. First up, check out this beauty on Conselyea Street.

116 Conselyea Street

You can have any kind of a home you want. You can even get stucco.

More Stucco at 116 Conselyea

Oh, how you can get stucco.

Representing Greenpoint, we have this beauty on Meeker Avenue!

Meeker Avenue Turd

Those of you who are familiar with this area (Meeker Avenue west of North Henry Street) can attest to the many amenities this location affords:

  1. Scenic views of the Brooklyn-Queens Expressway.
  2. UNeasy access to public transportation (unless you like to hitchhike) and other essentials such as grocery stores, laundromats and the like.
  3. The distinction of living in the most crime-ridden section of the 94th Precinct!

But all the previous are trivialities. Who cares about practicality when he or she can enjoy

…the most exclusive residential district in Florida Greenpoint East Williamsburg. Nobody lives there.

Miss Heather


3 Comments on Sucko in Stucco

  1. rowan on Wed, 16th Jan 2008 7:24 pm
  2. perhaps it is time for the stucco to get its own blog category. articles of fedderization, sections of stucco…?

  3. rexlic on Wed, 16th Jan 2008 7:25 pm
  4. A shout-out at newyorkshitty–I’m blushing! Thanks for the nod, and for those aficionados of mirth, merriment and Miss H., a little Marxist trivia.

    “The Cocoanuts,” the Marxes’ first flicker, was shot at what is now Kaufman-Astoria Studios in Queens. The boys made the film during the day, whilst trodding the boards at night on Broadway going “Animal Crackers.” Sound technology was still so primitive that during the legendary “Why a duck” exchange between Chico and Groucho, the map they’re examining had to be soaked in water so the crinkling of it wouldn’t obliterate the dialogue. The brothers returned to the studio the following year to make “Animal Crackers”–Hooray for Captain Spaulding!–before heading to Hollywood.

    And for those with Netflix accounts, as of this week you can watch an unlimited amount of whatever they have available for Instant Watching. This includes my personal favorite, “Horsefeathers.” Now, any hour of the night or day, I can cue up Groucho taking over the reins of Huxley College, singing “Whatever It Is, I’m Against It” while performing his lunatic corkscrew dance. Thank goodness for the interweb.

    Thanks again, Miss. H.

  5. guestofaguest on Wed, 16th Jan 2008 7:46 pm
  6. The prevalence of stucco is ponderous. If this was southbeachshitty, I would expect much of it. But Brooklyn?

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