Ode To The Greenpoint Post Office

April 21, 2010 by
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Recently the Mister decided to purchase yours truly a new compact disc player. This was a decision he rued because:

  • as soon as he brought it home I put it to good use (if you do not want someone to listen to Guns n Roses, do NOT buy her a new compact disc player).
  • it entailed a trip to our local Post Office.

Before Mister Heather endeavored to do the previous he swung by my job to see if he could bring me lunch afterward. I said he could and I placed my order. BIG MISTAKE. I waited. And waited. I started to get light-headed. I was cursing the Mister under my breath. One hour later he showed up: he has just gotten done at the Post Office. The usual litany of complaints followed a cold lunch:

  1. It is understaffed.
  2. The employees are churlish.
  3. There were disgruntled customers shouting in various languages.
  4. And so on and so forth…

I myself have witnessed all the previous— and more. In my estimation every third visit to the Post Office results in me bearing witness someone going into a tirade. Once in a blue moon they are even in English. One time I  heard a gentleman “explain” to an Postal employee (who would not let him pick up his wife’s parcel) that the reason he and his wife do not have the same last name was because (and I quote):

It is the 21st Century and my wife is not my property.

Another time I watched an employee explain to a rather tall and comely blonde that she could not receive mail under the moniker “Mistress so and so”. All mail sent to her highness had to be under he legal name. I won’t lie you: I was very amused by this dialogue. It made the twenty minute wait to pick up a package totally worth it.

These are but a few of my thoughts about the Greenpoint Post Office. On a lark I decided to see what the folks on Yelp have to say about this local institution. It isn’t pretty. Chris K. writes:

If I hadn’t been to other Brooklyn post offices, I’d say this one is merely trying to replicate Soviet Bloc-era Polish bureaucracy.

Use the automatic postage machines whenever possible.  They are more charming, exude more panache, and are infinitely more helpful than the staff.  Why? Mail something here, and you will probably encounter a woman best regarded as the retarded sister of Judge Milian from the People’s Court.  She’s a know it all, which means she probably received just slightly better than “pass” on her civil service exam, but I’ll tell you what, she doesn’t know the most important thing of all —

She sucks. Bad.

Newsflash: you don’t work on commission, so don’t try to make me pay more than I have to for postage.  And by what fit of logic are you telling me that my book can’t go in a flat rate envelope?

She’s easy to spot.  The one who probably kills kittens in her spare time. That one.  Fire her.

Mr. Mets was more succinct and to the point:

Just look at the picture – it’s self explanatory

You can read (and contribute to) the rage by clicking here. In closing, I am the only person who is noticing that their delivery people are not bothering to leave notices for parcels anymore? Thoughts— anyone?

Miss Heather


4 Comments on Ode To The Greenpoint Post Office

  1. kangastein on Wed, 21st Apr 2010 10:46 am
  2. i’ve actually called UPS and USPS multiple times to complain about not leaving notices (I live in Greenpoint)- and as far as I am concerned, not even stopping at my house or trying to deliver the package. I’ve had no luck on either front and have resorted to getting my packages delivered at my work! we don’t have a bell, but we’ve left notes for them to knock loudly – or call, which of course they never do.

  3. travis on Wed, 21st Apr 2010 11:11 am
  4. I’ve had the same problems for years, no notice left, things returned marked refused delivery, & delivering things god knows where, with both packages & certified mail.
    With packages, you have to track on the PO site & go pick up when it falsely says “Delivery attempt made, notice left”. Picking anything up there has become even more of an ordeal since they closed the pickup window a few months ago & you now have to go in the same line as people mailing stuff and deal with the several window workers including the inquisitor, rather than the civil if marginally competent woman who used to do package pickups.

  5. xdx on Wed, 21st Apr 2010 6:46 pm
  6. being a postal employee, not in greenpoint but in the even worse station of williamsburg… i can say a few things… first let me apologized for shitty service, but with volume going down and the post office losing money left and right mangers have taken some steps to reduce costs.

    yes we are understaffed management has “excised” clerks. so you notice there might be 5 windows, but only 3 open at once.

    those pink slips, we dont even have them 50% of the time, cause they dont want to pay for them to be printed. this isnt a excuse, i get pissed off when my fellow workers(truck drivers) come up to my route in the morning, and hand me a bunch of pink slips. i ask.. why didnt you leave the package? they usually say ” im not getting in trouble for leaving it in a building”.

    i being a bad employee, leave everything i carry.(for your info, anything smaller than a shoe box carriers take, anything over truck drivers) i know no one wants to wait in that line, and then after waiting, being told we cant find the package.

    as far as notes saying please call. we can not use our cell phones on the job, we are “written up” for using them, it is a safety hazard, we do not make the rule but we have to follow them. and right now, the office of inspector general(OIG) is out on the street watching carriers in williamsburg and greenpoint. they are looking to fire people for any violation. “time wasting practice, cell phone use, ipod use, taking too long on the street, stealing time, talking too long to our customers…track drivers have a time quota of x amount of packages per hour, therefor the will wait like a minute max for someone to answer the door.

    this is the new post office, i would say get used to it until we disappear. customer service doesnt exist anymore, its all about numbers, everything has a time, everything even taking a piss.

    there are many good carriers out there, just talk to yours, ask questions you will be surprised to ask for a redeliver , and get the package the next day… yes there are awful carriers out there too, but in silly gov’t rules, you cant be fired..it takes a hell of a lot to get fired… and i assure you, not leaving notices isnt gonna get anyone fired.

    ill check later and answer any question you need answered.

    oh yeah, the food drive is may 8th, it is one of the good things the PO does, please give a can, rice or any food you can.

  7. Rebecca11222 on Thu, 22nd Apr 2010 7:08 pm
  8. It has been clear to me since 2000 that the Greenpoint Post Office has been losing staff. Did I call the 800 number & complain? Again and again. I learned that I actually saved time by going into Manhattan (even the Cooper Union Station).

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