Now At 77 Box Street: WTF?

August 21, 2011 by
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

I suspect some of you have wondered, gentle readers, exactly what the deal is with the inexplicable bit of residential property (as seen above from the stairwell of the Pulaski bridge) perched atop this otherwise industrial building. I know I have.  So you can imagine my delight when today— at long last— I got an answer: it is a hotel!

More specifically: it is The Box House Hotel. After I stopped laughing I headed home without delay. I simply had to see this website for myself.

It is truly something to behold. Follows is my favorite passage for your edification and/or amusement:

Not a hotel in your traditional sense, but what we offer are gorgeous designer loft apartments available for rental, either weekly or monthly. Very private. Located in the Industrial chic area of North Greenpoint. Walking distance to the Vernon-Jackson 7 train ( 1 stop from Grand Central station) or The Greenpoint avenue G train.

I have lived in Greenpoint for over 11 years now. I honestly did not know this area (which is a used-condom’s toss from the Newtown Creek Waste Water Treatment Facility) constituted “chic”. Obviously I am way behind the times. Thus desiring to get caught up— and learn what constitutes “Industrial chic”— I pulled up a satellite map via Google. Follows are my findings/conclusions:

“Industrial chic” (as found in north Greenpoint, anyway) is any one/combination of the following:

  • McGuinness Boulevard
  • The Pulaski Bridge
  • A rather large DOT Facility
  • Continental Auto Parts
  • McGuinness Power Brake Service
  • Newtown Creek
  • Motiva and (albeit some ways down the road)
  • One very short block away from a 200 bed assessment center for homeless, single men.


View Larger Map

Who knew?!? I certainly didn’t! I suppose it goes without saying that such luxe environs (and accommodations) come at a price. Without further ado, here are the rates. Get your checkbooks ready!

Standard Suite 600sf 

  • Weekend (3 night/ Fri.-Sun.) $500
  • Week $800
  • Month $2500

City View Suite 650sf

  • Weekend (3 night/ Fri.-Sun.) $525
  • Week $875
  • Month $2800

Duplex Suite 800sf

  • Weekend (3 night/ Fri.-Sun.) $550
  • Week $925
  • Month $2950

Two Bedroom Suite

  • Per Night $225
  • Week $1500
  • Month $4950

Don’t believe me? Point and click your way to this establishment’s website and see for yourself! I’ll have a box of Kleenex ready when you’re done.

Miss Heather

P.S.: Lest you are wondering this arrangement is perfectly legal.

 

Comments

6 Comments on Now At 77 Box Street: WTF?

  1. SpillConspirator on Sun, 21st Aug 2011 4:17 pm
  2. Wow! Who knew that I lived in the high end “industrial chic” part of the neighborhood. I wonder how the 200 bed homeless shelter will be defined. Homeless industrial chic?

  3. missheather on Sun, 21st Aug 2011 6:25 pm
  4. Surely we can come up with some snappy acronym for this location (like DUMBO, TriBeCa or whatever the hell they’re calling Clinton/Hell’s Kitchen nowadays). Thoughts?

  5. localperc on Mon, 22nd Aug 2011 12:39 am
  6. PuTRID
    Pulaski Towards the River Industrial District?

  7. missheather on Mon, 22nd Aug 2011 11:48 am
  8. Very nice!

    [...] floor of a warehouse at 77 Box Street, in plain view of the Pulaski Bridge and, as New York Shitty points out, a DOT facility, an auto parts store, the superfund-ed Newton Creek, and a 200-bed homeless [...]

  9. jjboller on Wed, 23rd Nov 2011 6:06 pm
  10. I realize that I’m a little late commenting on this post, but hey it’s been a busy year. Anyway, I just want to offer the contrarian opinion. Is it really so bad that someone is trying to make a luxury establishment in North Greenpoint? Having lived in North Greenpoint for 10 years, and having no desire to live anywhere else in this city, I have an emotional and financial investment the ‘hood. I understand that increasing rent is driving local business and residents out. And I do believe that is to the detriment of Greenpoint. The biggest reason I call it home is because of the people and local businesses. I love the man who sweeps the sidewalk infront of the retirement home every day, and the owners of Rivera’s Grocery. It is a fantastic neighborhood, and I don’t want to see these long time residents and businesses forced out. However, I also don’t want Greenpoint to stagnate either. I want the neighborhood to grow and thrive. I want to see more great shops like Eastern District open. I would love for there to be a decent place for my family to stay when they come to visit me. I would love to have more sway with the powers that be when the next DOT station, or assessment center is located. The only way that is going to happen is with development. Not Bloomblight development, there has been a 1/2 built building next to me for over 2 years, but honest development, which means that there will be some “out with the old, in with the new”. I get it, I do. I read this blog often and share its views, humor and opinions. But I sometimes can’t help being the outsider saying, would a chic boutique hotel in Greenpoint be the worst thing in the world?

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