Happy Hanukkah From New York Shitty!

December 21, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

Earlier today I wrote: I don’t know about you but there is NO WAY I am going outside today!

Once the sun came out later I couldn’t resist throwing on my coat and enjoying some sorely missed sunshine. I’m glad I did as I got this lovely photograph from McCarren Park.

Happy Hannukah everybody!

Miss Heather

Best. Christmas. Card. Ever.

December 21, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

As it would happen I bumped into my buddies Mike And Laura during last week’s snowstorm. Just like myself, once they saw the snow they immediately thought of our very own waste treatment facility. However, they were more adventurous (or impervious to hypothermia) than I. Upon noticing the first hint of the white stuff our power couple (or double trouble) proceeded to Greenpoint’s nature walk without delay to capture the wonderland that is our newest park.

I got a nice picture of some yellow snow for you.

Laura said. This choice morsel has yet to find its way to my inbox. But the following, what is perhaps the finest Christmas e-card I have ever seen, has. I loved it so much I simply had to share with you. Enjoy!

Is it me or does that reindeer bear more than a passing resemblance to Mr. Hankey the Christmas turd?

Miss Heather

READ THIS FIRST

December 21, 2008 ·
Filed under: Area 51, Crazy People, Greenpoint Magic 

(Or some strangeness from the junk shop).

Yesterday The Thing had a customer with a most interesting request. He was seeking a thoroughly craptastic gift for five dollars or less. It was for his brother in law. I had honestly never given the matter any thought, but the good ol’ junk shop is an excellent place to purchase gifts for that not-so-special-someone: amongst all the treasure to be found are some items if, not outrightly repulsive, are downright odd. Yesterday proved to be no exception. I found an ancient, rusted out vaporizer, we agreed on the asking price of one whole dollar and our intrepid brother in law was on his merry way.

On that note I would like to share a couple choice discoveries I made at The Thing yesterday while rustling amongst the boxes (UPON BOXES) that were delivered recently. Enjoy!

1. One Bag of Floppy Disks With A Most Mysterious Note

I happened upon the note first.

This was a good thing as it enabled me to follow the author’s instructions to the letter. Let’s see what were are to read first, shall we? It looks pretty important.

Whoa dude! It’s one thing to toy with man’s life but his son’s puberty as well?!? As it would happen the Mister possesses a floppy disk reader. Guess what we will be doing this Christmas holiday? I can hardly wait.

Next up, I remember my parents telling that my Kindergarten class held a mock election in the aftermath of the Watergate scandal. Amusingly enough, my none-too-politically-aware classmates voted unanimously for Tricky Dick. I suppose that’s to be expected from a bunch of five year olds, but what about a grown adult who sees fit to erect a shrine to the man whose middle name is Milhous? Yup, you just read me correctly.

2. The Richard Milhous Nixon Shrine To Freedom

Methinks this will have to be made into a postcard. Or something. Ideas anyone?

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Franklin Street

December 21, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

I don’t know about you but there is NO WAY I am going outside today! However, I have more photographs (such as the above one I took en route to the post office*— oh joy!) to add to my collection of Greenpoint winter-time goodness, so keep an eye out for them… and STAY WARM!

Miss Heather

*Who managed to misplace two packages of ours and where we had the pleasure of having some utterly clueless (intoxicated?) gentleman wave an envelope in our face and query us as the whether it had sufficient postage to mail. If you are wondering, the answer was yes… and no. The stamps he placed on it totalled out to 46 cents. But alas, one of them hard already been used. Dumbass.

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: NO

December 20, 2008 ·
Filed under: Dog Shit Signage, Greenpoint Magic 

From India Street.

Miss Heather

Winter Wonderland!

December 20, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

If there’s one time Greenpoint really shines it is when it is has a nice dusting of snow. For this reason I am going to share with you some photographs I took of yesterday’s snowstorm. Enjoy!

Be sure to check out the neat pix Rowan5 took of Bushwick inlet as well. They can be found in the New York Shitty photo pool. They’re worth the point and click!

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: Pre-Hanukkah Goodness

December 20, 2008 ·
Filed under: Manhattan 

This image comes courtesy of Garsav. And what a lovely image it is! Thanks for contributing and Happy Hanukkah everybody!

Miss Heather

Public Service Announcement

December 19, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Those of you who haven’t gotten your fill of the white fluffy stuff will be pleased as punch to know that the Brooklyn Ice Cream Factory is open today.

Remember, they only use the finest, purest natural ingredients!

Brooklyn Ice Cream Factory
97 Commercial Street
Brooklyn, New York 11222

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: The Garden Spot Alps

December 19, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Fuck Dr. Zhivago. Nothing says wintertime romance to yours truly like a set of snow-capped Shit Tits!

Miss Heather

TONIGHT: Vol. 1

December 19, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Today, starting at 8:00 p.m. Bar Matchless, Hexed Journal and WORD bookstore present the third installment of Vol. 1, an evening of live music, spoken word and stand-up comedy. The way it works is like this: each month a subject is selected for the participants to expound upon. Fittingly enough the topic for this evening’s event is “The Gift”, so expect to hear tales about the “sometimes joyous, other times awkward, act of giving or receiving a gift.” There is a five dollar suggested donation at the door (proceeds to benefit 826NYC, a non-profit writing center to help students 6-18 develop writing skills). And as always books will be happily accepted on the behalf of Books Through Bars.*

Vol. 1
December 19, 2008, 8:00 p.m.
Bar Matchless
557 Manhattan Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11222

Now if you don’t mind I’m off the frolic in the snow!

Miss Heather

*In particular demand are books pertaining to the following subject matter:

  • African-American history, especially 20th century
  • Native American history
  • Latin American history
  • Radical politics
  • Social sciences and psychology
  • Dictionaries, thesauruses, and Spanish-English dictionaries
  • Learning world languages
  • How-to (drawing, chess, sign language…)
  • Mayan and Aztec history
  • Memoirs and fiction by people of color
  • Poetry anthologies