TOMORROW: Empty Cages Collective At PS9!

February 20, 2009 ·
Filed under: Crazy Cat Lady, Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 


Saturday, February 21, from noon until 5:00 p.m. the cats of Empty Cages will be eagerly waiting to make your acquaintance at Williamsburg’s very own PS9. Why not swing by and say hi? Who knows, maybe you’ll make a new furry friend or two?

Empty Cages Collective Adoption Event
February 21, 2009, 12:00 – 5:00 p.m.
PS9 Pet Supplies
169 North 9th Street
Brooklyn, New York 11211

Oh yeah, even if you are not in the position to adopt Empty Cages gladly welcomes donations be it supplies, your time or money. For more details about volunteering please check out their web site or contact them via email at:

emptycagescollective (at) gmail (dot) com


Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: From Freeman Street With Love

February 20, 2009 ·
Filed under: Dog Shit Signage, Greenpoint Magic 



Nothing says “curb your dog” like a generous sprinkling of cayenne pepper in your tree pits.


Nothing says love like a discarded DVD of “Nasty Girls #14″…


…save perhaps this.

Miss Heather

Crosstown Local Photo Du Jour: Fashion

February 20, 2009 ·
Filed under: Crosstown Local, Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 


The missive comes courtesy of the Smith – 9th platform at Greenpoint Avenue’s very own G train. On a semi-related note Williamsburg’s Fashion Weekend kicks off today. Maybe they can teach these reality television fucktards a few things about style? Or not. In any case here’s a snippet from their press release:

Williamsburg Fashion Weekend!

See where up-and-coming Brooklyn designers are taking fashion. The presentations are anything but ordinary or predictable, with show-specific live music scores and artist performances.

When: Friday, February 20th, and Saturday, February 21st, 2009.

– Featuring the collections of eight Brooklyn designers.

– Four collections on Friday. Four collections on Saturday.

Where: At Glasslands Gallery in Williamsburg, Brooklyn.

Williamsburg Fashion Weekend
February 20 -21, 2009
Glasslands Gallery

289 Kent Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11211

For more details click here. No kid should be forced to wear a candy-ass outfit like this. Do it for the children!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Video Du Jour: Let Them Have Porn!

February 20, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 


Last night I had a conversation with someone I (and many others) highly respect. After airing concerns about his work situation (and who isn’t concerned about such things nowadays?) he confided in me that he wasn’t really good at anything but writing. He seemed to be depressed about this, but as someone who could, would, should be earning five figures as a sales person (but whose heart is lies in art and mayhem) I understood. Some people are simply not “cut out” to sit at a desk. We want to roam, take photographs, write and follow our creative flights of fancy; my blog has been a product of this as is his.

Does this make us any better or worse? No, not necessarily— but being different doesn’t pay for shit. Then again being the “same” isn’t as safe as it used to be. I know too many people who have been laid off in Greenpoint to recount here.  And many more who fear for their jobs. This upsets me tremendously.

However so trivial I take a perverse pride in my daily tribulations at the junk shop— if for no other reason because I suspect my fellow New York Shittites might enjoy them.

Larry da Junkman was sick, so he took a break outside. I, albeit briefly, presided over the junk shop. And with this came the supreme perk: I selected the music. And what did I, the decider, choose to play? The Beastie Boys, naturally. AS LOUD AS I COULD PLAY IT. And who decided to chat me up in return? Lovers of porn and Dire Straits.

Mostly porn.

There may very well be a recession but I can personally affirm the demand for porn has not dropped. It has in fact increased.

When I was nine years old I had my whole life planned out, e.g.; getting educated, married, having a “nice” job, kids, etc. Somewhere along the way I took a wrong right turn. And now I find myself being the Greenpoint masturbation mensch.

Do I have any regrets about this, you ask? HELL NO!

Miss Heather

P.S.: This is dedicated to my fellow creative weirdo— you know who you are!

A Greenpoint Blind Item: What’s Up At 85 Driggs Avenue?

February 19, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

piethumbnailA number of you who reside around McGolrick Park have probably noticed that business has not been as usual (if “usual” it ever was— it’s always been closed when I have walked by) down at Cup of Joes. This is because it isn’t: the space has been sublet to a new business.  More specifically one operated by a very talented baker, fellow Greenpointer and all-around very nice person (whose sumptuous product can be seen at left).

Anyone care to guess who it is?

The more impatient among you can get the reveal by clicking here. Or better yet— why not head down to 85 Driggs Avenue and see for yourself. Trust me: TASTING IS TRULY BELIEVING!

The Place Formerly known as Cup of Joe’s
85 Driggs Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11222

Tell ’em Miss Heather sent you!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: No Wading, Please

February 19, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Newtown Creek 


This public service announcement comes from the Newtown Creek Nature Walk. You can more snaps from my recent trip to Greenpoint’s most (in)famous park by clicking here.

Miss Heather

TONIGHT: Good Librations At The Diamond Bar

February 19, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 


This item comes courtesy of Jason Diamond. He writes:

… Thursday night we are throwing a little dance party/fund-raiser magic for our pals The Desk Set.  Proceeds go towards their book drive for A.P. Tureaud Elementary, a public school in New Orleans serving students in pre-K through 6th grade.  Tureaud needs to replace the books from their library that Katrina destroyed, so come help out, because unlike after most nights out, you will wake up feeling great about the previous evening’s shenanigans.

Come down, drink, dance, win prizes, and have fun for a good cause, as The Diamond has promised to donate a buck from every drink to A.P. Tureaud for the first two hours.  No cover!

There will be a raffle conducted by Cowboy Mark* and music from DJ’s Jason Diamond and Dirty Jean. Check it out!

Good Librations, Vol. I
February 19, 2009
The Diamond Bar
43 Franklin Street
Brooklyn, New York 11222

Miss Heather

*With prizes from Think Coffee, Kill Devil Hill, McSweeneys, Asthmatic Kitty Records, Heeb Magazine, Dandelion Wine and Dalaga.

Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: Neighbor Of The Beast

February 19, 2009 ·
Filed under: Williamsburg 


From Broadway.

Miss Heather

Reader Email of The Day: The Magic Is Dead…

February 19, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

…long live the magic!


As many of you by now are well aware, the above masterpiece of Darthchitecture, Greenpoint’s very own Versailles, has declared bankruptcy. I could (re)hash the manifold ways this turd was a very, VERY bad idea from the start, talk about the many times I and a number of fellow citizens have called 311 on these fine people, point out the shoddiness of its construction or recall for you the many pleasant greetings (READ: catcalls) I have received from the fine men who built this testament to progress. But I have done all these things already— and more. Instead let us, fellow Greenpointers, look to the future! K writes:

…I figure you know about this due to linking alerts for your blog but here we go… or there He went.

Magic’s magic is ummmm… bankrupt!?

Not to wish ill, but let us be reasonable about the reality of where we live and what it can (should?) house.

Maybe they’ll make a skate park for the youth in the drained pool… and turn the sauna into a Public Russian (Polish) Bath House?

I for one think the Polish bathhouse idea has legs. For starters it’ll give the chaps who shave their backs on the steps of St. Anthony’s a place where they can get a little privacy while exercising some much-needed personal hygiene. What do you think should be done with the Viridian? Convert it into a casino? High-end brothel? A Walmart, perhaps? Leave your suggestions in the comments!

Miss Heather

Photo Credit: Kitchen Prof

Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: Student Driver

February 18, 2009 ·
Filed under: Williamsburg 


From Union Avenue.

Miss Heather