Fedders Friday Returns: Guernsey Street

July 11, 2008 ·
Filed under: Area 51 

I have been very negligent in regards to my regular feature: Fedders Friday. I could give you a litany of very plausible excuses or I could simply state the truth:

I forgot.

It’s a good thing the other half and I walked down Guernsey Street this week.

I’m not too sure what this building looked like in the yesteryear, but it looks like ass now.

I for one like the balconies.

This entrance has all the charm of a hospital. Or mental institution.

Naturally this edifice sports not only Fedders boxes but also ample parking!

For the select.

Miss Heather

Models Galavanting In Our Misery

July 11, 2008 ·
Filed under: Bed-Stuy, Bushwick, Greenpoint Magic, Long Island City, Queens, Williamsburg 

I will not disclose who I received this (forwarded) email from because I like— and much more importantly respect— said person. Regardless, as a citizen who lives in a neighborhood teeming with environmental fuck-ups I do not appreciate the tone of said message. Hence why I am posting it here on New York Shitty:

Thanks for getting back to me… (insert name, lol). I’ve shot at DUMBO already and so has everyone else, it’s considered overdone! The more grittier locations are what’s good for high fashion. Aggregate is like a sand and coal mixture, I think it’s used for paving… anyway, they store this stuff in huge piles so it forms pyramids or mountains and it looks really cool (I attached a few images). The only thing is that I can’t seem to find out where the compounds are…

The cement plant at the Morgan Avenue Stop of the L immediately comes to mind. But if any of you, dear readers, can think of abject sites in Brooklyn (Queens, Staten Island or the Bronx) which complement sinuous models clad in glamorous apparel email me at missheather (at) newyorkshitty (dot) com. I’ll forward them.

Miss Heather

Jaunt In Queens: A Garden Gnome Retrospective

July 11, 2008 ·
Filed under: Queens 

Before going to this week’s Community Board 1 meeting the Mister and I took a jaunt in Queens. The week prior we were driven through Maspeth and I was smitten by the garden statuary. I simply had to return.

Welcome to Queens.

We like garden gnomes.

Be they sweeping…

sitting on the grass…

or fondling a rabbit’s ass.

Maspeth loves them some garden gnomes.

Big time.

The above gnomes grace this day care center. I realize the following anecdote will only resonate with the select few who were born in the 1970′s, but I’ll recount it anyway.

Ma Heather: If someone gives you pretty stickers, don’t lick the back of them.
L’il Heather: Why?
Ma Heather: Bad things will happen.

I never licked a sticker in my life and this freaks me out.

Big time.*

Miss Heather

*But I like Maspeth. A lot.

Greenpoint Photos du Jour: Vandalism!

July 11, 2008 ·
Filed under: Asshole, Greenpoint Magic 

Just as Peter Vallone Jr. prognosticated, the guys at Alphabeta have precipitated a wave of mindless vandalism in the neighborhood!

Oh wait, the peeps at East Coast Aliens* actually asked Alphabeta to decorate their security gate. Go figure.

Regardless I was outraged by this flagrant act of art-making in front of Christina’s Restaurant last night. Is this what our society has come to? Juvenile delinquency trickling up to septuagenarians?

Fellow Greenpointers, if you see someone expressing him/herself don’t ask questions or bother our elected officials. Report it immediately to Peter Vallone Jr.

Peter Vallone Jr.
22-45 31st Street
Astoria, NY 11105
(718) 274-0007
vallone4ny (at) gmail (dot) com

He clearly has our best interests at heart.

Miss Heather

*Whose schedule will be limited this summer, but they’re having a fundraiser for Barack Obama July 26. Check out their calendar for details.

THIS WEEKEND: The Grandmother of All Stoop Sales

July 10, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Lian of Kent Street the mastermind behind last month’s “Mother of all stoop sales” hits us again with another another one this weekend: THE MOTHER OF ALL STOOP SALES – Part II. The pickings look pretty good so it would probably be wise to get there bright and early before everything is picked over!

If you have a stoop sale, new business or event in the Greenpoint/North Brooklyn area and want to get the word out shoot me an email at missheather (at) newyorkshitty (dot) com. I’ll be delighted to post it if/when time permits.

Miss Heather

It’s Official

July 10, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

A number of people are wondering what will become of this old precinct house located on Herbert Street. Last night I bumped into Rich Mazur of the North Brooklyn Development Corporation and he gave me the good news: last month the papers were signed and it is to be converted into affordable housing. Apparently our representative, Joseph Lentol, pitched the proposal to Housing Preservation & Development, Diana Reyna secured $1,000,000 from the New York City Council and the Borough President’s Office chipped in another $500,000. I was not told how many there units will be, but with studios starting in the $100,000s it will indeed be affordable to a number of people who could not otherwise afford to live in our great neighborhood!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photo du Jour: Princess

July 10, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

From McGuinness Boulevard.

Miss Heather

THIS WEEKEND: Angel Street Thrift Shop

July 10, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

As I lover of all things junky and funky, I simply had to pass this along. “Angel Street” will definitely be on my “to do” list this weekend!

Miss Heather

Parking a la 94th Precinct: Guernsey Street

July 10, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Inasmuch as I criticize the local police precinct, I understand that being charged with protecting the public is a tough job: the hours are grueling, the pay is low, and so forth.

However, as the guardians of law and order our boys in blue should themselves obey the laws they are hired to enforce.

As a citizen I find it more than a little disquieting to find motor vehicles belonging to New York’s Finest parked in such a manner.

It not only shows a disregard for public safety, but also a lack of respect for the community they profess to serve.

Miss Heather

Williamsburg Photo du Jour: North 7th Street

July 10, 2008 ·
Filed under: Williamsburg 

Those of you who are interested in learning what artist this image is appropriating might find this link enlightening.

Miss Heather