New York Shitty Photo Du Jour: The Word On The Street

Smile nys

Taken September 17, 2014.

From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: Don’t Shoot

Taken by Scoboco.

Urban Fur: Stray Cat Strut

(sort of)

Feral and fed on Judge Street nys

A fulsome feral fella from Judge Street.

Afternoon Nap nys

A pampered pussy just down the block.

Garfield in bondage nys

Garfield in bondage via a truck grill a little further down. Maujer Street, methinks.

Cat Hotel Meserole Street nys

Naturally I had to check in on my favorite feral cat Callie. So I headed east on Meserole Street. Therein I discovered the “Cat Hotel”!

SGI nys

Alas, neither she nor her “friend” Peter were to be found. However, her on-again/off-again companion from across the street was holding court.

One handsome tuxedo nys

He’s one handsome— and thankfully ear-tipped— fellow.

Smudgehead nys

And last, but hardly least, this lass.

Working Class Cat nys

Tunny reveal nys

Meserole Street Cat nys

She put on quite a show for yours truly— and in return got ample rubbins!

Meserole Street Cat 2 nys

New York Shitty Street Art Du Jour: Not In Kansas Anymore

September 18, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11211, Gentrification, Hooliganism, Street Art, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

Dorothy nys

As discovered across the street from the Atlantic Attic vintage shop.

(Taken September 18, 2014.)

The Word On The Street, Part II: Morgan Avenue

Morgan Avenue nys

Taken September 18, 2014.

Urban Artifact: Wish Fulfillment!

CBS screencapSo over the last week we have had:

1. Time Warner employee sex at the Newtown Creek Nature Walk.*

2. Some blue chip public urination at Graham Avenue’s B43 bus stop thrown in for good measure

3. Indecent exposure (as seen at left) on our very Crosstown Local.

Yes, gentle readers, I’d say things are hoppin’.  So much so I lament not seeing my share of the action. Obviously I have been not at the wrong place at the right time. I shared my disappointment with my public urination tipster. To wit, he/she replied:

Awwww Heather. I just know there’s an exposed penis out there for you too. And I bet when you see it, it’ll be the longest one of all. :)

Today it finally happened— in a manner of speaking. Thankfully it did not involve lewd public acts and I actually had the choice of looking— or not. Read on!

371 Stagg Street nys

Ever had the feeling you’re being watched? Today while strolling along Stagg Street I did.

Stagg Street Art Object nys

Sure enough I was right. So help me, but I can swear this fellow was beckoning me to come closer.

Big Head nys

So I did.

Pitching a tent nys

As you can see my new friend is, to use vulgar parlance, “pitching a tent”. Let’s go in!

Little Head nys

What a piece of work is a man! How noble in reason, how infinite in faculty! In form and moving how express and admirable! In action how like an Angel! in apprehension HOW LIKE A GOD!

— William Shakespeare, emphasis mine— Ed. Note.

I can only imagine what the provenance of this item is. A remnant of some hitherto unknown bacchanalian Industrial Business Zone ritual, perhaps?

Heres looking at you kid nys

Here’s looking at you, kid…

Closing on a somewhat related note, your’s truly discovered and acquired a most fascinating product recently. I present without further ado, Peni Fresh!

The FRESHMAKER nys

soapActually I acquired a few bars— much to the amusement of the staff at said deli/grocery. One was a birthday present (said birthday boy was present), the others will be stocking stuffers. The holiday season will be upon us soon enough and let’s face facts: nothing says “Good will toward your fellow man” quite like telling them, however subtly, that they need to wash their tackle. I have yet to discern exactly what is meant by “TUTTI-FRUITTI” flavor. Methinks I’ll leave that task to Ralphie. Those of you who want to upgrade your mere dingus to a dicksicle, methinks I have found the product to make it happen. Cheers!

Peni Fresh: the Freshmaker!

*surveillance footage of which was requested by and is apparently making the rounds through the Newtown Creek Monitoring Committee!

Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: Another One Bites The Dust

September 18, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11211, Gentrification, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

Moving Soon nys

And so it goes…

(Taken September 18, 2014.)

 

From The New York Shitty Inbox: He’s Baaaack!

September 18, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11211, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

hes back nys

I have received word from Citizen Robin (who took the photo gracing the beginning this of this post that one of Williamsburg’s more notable citizens, “Joe”, has returned to 373 Graham Avenue. I can assure you this is an event about which Mr. Loiacono’s neighbors— and probably the 90th and 94th Precincts— do not share this sign maker’s or (in all likelihood) these women’s enthusiasm.

sign and broken door

The reasons for this are numerous— far too numerous to recount here. What’s more I need not do so: there is a web site dedicated solely to this fellow’s misdeeds— and impressive array of hooliganism it is! Yours truly’s personal favorite is violating a restraining order. This he saw fit to do in a spectacular manner. Namely, chasing the person protected by said order with a power saw. You can’t make this shit up, folks.

373 Graham Ave 9182014

This isn’t to suggest the residents of this building during Joe’s incarceration were a cake walk. They weren’t. The broken window in the above photograph bears silent witness to this fact. In any case as of yesterday, September 17th 2014, he’s back. And if the last time “Joe” matriculated from the criminal justice system (which came to pass in May of 2012) is any indication, he can be expected to be— how shall we say— a mite bit sullen?

inmatehandbook

Of course it is called the “penal/corrections” system for a reason. Club Med Riker’s is most decidedly not. My advice: tread carefully and quietly, Williamsburgers.

Happy Thursday, Graham Avenue!

The Word On The Street, Part I: Just Say Yes…

Hear Hear NYS

to tacos, that is. I for one am 100% behind this message. Who doesn’t love a good taco?

(Taken September 17, 2014.)

From The New York Shitty Photo Pool, Part II: 5Pointz

September 17, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11101, Gentrification, Long Island City, Long Island City Queens 

Taken by Denn-Ice.