Urban Artifact: (at a loss for a title)

March 12, 2015 ·
Filed under: 11220, Sunset Park, Sunset Park Brooklyn, Urban Artifact, WTF 

Now that the truly harsh wintry weather is behind us (fingers crossed), a great deal urban detritus has been unearthed from the receding snow. In my observation it has been mostly dog shit, cigarette butts (LOTS of cigarette butts), rotten food and empty liquor bottles. Vodka mostly. While certainly not pleasant to look at (much less smell), is this really surprising? No, it is not. We have simply been faced with a record of exactly how much trash is tossed and/or accumulates on our streets and sidewalks over sustained period of time. It isn’t pretty— but a head-scratcher this mostly decidedly is not.

Today— the weather being amenable and sporting a brand new pair of walking shoes— I opted to take a walk around Sunset Park. Upon exiting the subway I was promptly greeted by my first “street find”. It too, is not pretty— but a “head scratcher” it most decidedly is.

Feet nys

A dead chicken inside a cheerfully pink box of Pampers Pull-ups. Note how they coordinate with my new sneaks! There was also a quarter in there. I opted (for reasons which methinks are obvious) to leave both be.

Dead chicken in Huggies Pullups box with dead pigeon nys

The deceased chicken had a companion in the manner of a(n also) deceased pigeon.

Fourth Avenue at 65 Street nys

How/why this came to be I honestly do not know. I do not think I want to know. Nonetheless, here it is for posterity.

East Village Photo Du Jour: 4th Avenue

Hear Hear nys

Taken December 5, 2014.

New York Shitty Photos Du Jour: The Writing On The Wall

One can always depend on this building (which is located at 4th Avenue and East 10 Street) for interesting commentary…

The Word On The Street: 4th Avenue Lament

September 29, 2011 ·
Filed under: 10003, East Village, East Village Manhattan, The Word On The Street 

Taken September 29, 2011.

East Village Photos du Jour: THINK

July 1, 2011 ·
Filed under: 10003, East Village, East Village Manhattan 

Taken June 29, 2011.

Miss Heather

East Village Photo du Jour: Fourth Avenue

May 7, 2011 ·
Filed under: 10003, East Village, East Village Manhattan, Street Art 

Of all the photographs I have taken lately I have to say this one is my favorite. The woman at right had just completed a phone call. I have no idea what it was about— but clearly whatever transpired made her very happy. She doesn’t have a care in the world!

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Slide Show Du Jour: East Village Selections

As today’s decidedly NON-Brooklyn content indicates, yours truly knocked around the East Village yesterday.  I was experiencing the worst kind of wanderlust imaginable and finally succumbed. I’m glad I did: I had a very enjoyable afternoon. The Mister (who met me later) had a good time as well. Given that yesterday was his “special day” this is a good thing— because the other 364 belong to me. Highlights from our sojourn in the bog city included— but are not limited to:

  1. An interrogation from a very cute— if intense— 5-6 year old girl about my wardrobe. After asking exactly how I get my top on and off (and I answered as best I could without exposing myself) she directed her attention (and hands) to my Hello Kitty necklace and purse. Thanks to these items I passed— albeit by a hair— muster.
  2. Having a man (upon seeing me taking pictures on the Bowery) inform me that Drew Barrymore lived in the building across the street. He seemed to be puzzled by the fact I didn’t care. I thanked him nonetheless for this (hither to be useful) piece of information.
  3. The Mister stumbling upon a gaggle of 20-somethings poring over a map at Astor Place and deciding that if they kept walking east they would find Bedford Avenue and North 3rd Street. While not entirely correct, their assessment is not entirely wrong either. I’m guessing this is the reason the Mister decided not to intervene. As I write this post I wonder if they found their destination. I imagine if they managed to reach the outer limits of Alphabet City they had a rather provocative evening— and the kind genuine New York City experiences they don’t cover in the guidebooks.
  4. And of course, there is the above item which I found on the East 10 Street wailing wall. Naturally it reminds me of a story. Here it goes. A collage buddy of mine, we’ll call her D, had the rather unfortunate habit of dating some of the most useless specimens of manhood to be had. This was especially true of a guy we’ll call “Fuckhead”. Why the moniker, you ask? Very simple: he was a hockey fan and had the annoying habit of wearing a hockey puck shaped piece of head gear when enjoying the sport. This apparel was emblazoned with the word “Puckhead”. I and a few other folks who were not too fond of this gent simply changed a letter and this became our moniker for him. ANYHOO, “Fuckhead” also liked basketball— and did not like to do housework. So you can imagine how D felt when she came home from a hard day at work to discover Fuckhead (who, it should be added, only worked part time) sitting on his tuckus watching the game— and that the garbage had not been taken out. She had assigned him this one very simple task before she left for work. It should also be noted that D was also experiencing her period. You, dear readers, will quickly learn why this somewhat sordid piece of information is salient to my tale— so humor me.In any case, she was not the least bit happy and told him so. In return Fuckhead continued watching the game. After quickly deducing that employing words and reason were not working she went to Plan B: she reached into her underwear, grabbed her used sanitary napkin and affixed it to the monitor of the television set. This got Fuckhead’s undivided attention, but he did not feel compelled to remove it. He continued to “watch” the game— and she continued to fume. As I understand it, this used feminine hygiene product remained on the television set for several hours. D eventually removed it. I cannot recall who ended up taking out the trash. But that’s not really important— and I digress.

Without further ado here are highlights from my six hour trek around the East Village and beyond. Enjoy!

This slide show can be seen in larger format by clicking here.

Miss Heather

Spotted In Manhattan: Worst Ad Campaign EVER

August 26, 2010 ·
Filed under: 10003, 10009, Culture War, East Village, East Village Manhattan 

Where do I start with this? Twenty four hours after spotting these ads in Manhattan words still fail me. But I will attempt to articulate my feelings anyway:

  1. If this tactic, e.g.; using children/young ‘uns to boost ratings/sales hasn’t worked for network television— FOR DECADES (See: Scrappy Doo and Oliver)— I fail to see why/how it is going to work now.
  2. I really wish media pundits, advertising wizards and their brethren would disavow themselves of the erroneous notion that everyone thinks babies are cute. They don’t. I know because I am one of these people. Before anyone cries “child hater” I want to make it known I like kids: once they have learned to speak— and more importantly— are toilet trained.
  3. Since no one in the “focus group” that was undoubtedly conducted to assess this “concept” didn’t say so I will here and now: when I see babies I think of one thing: incontinence. This does not make me want to buy your product. Quite to the contrary: even the vaguest insinuation that your product will reduce yours truly to wearing diapers (again) makes me run— not walk— the other direction.
  4. The advertisement with 30-40 man sporting the above shirt (which I can kick myself for not photographing) is just plain creepy.
  5. I would like to humbly recommend the folks responsible for this acquaint themselves with the following chap (who is an institution of sorts at the Coney Island Mermaid Parade) and retool their campaign accordingly.

Diaper Man

THIS is what I call living young!

Miss Heather

East Village Street Art Du Jour: Bouquet

August 26, 2010 ·
Filed under: 10003, 10009, East Village, East Village Manhattan, Street Art 

From 4th Avenue.

Miss Heather

East Village Street Art Du Jour: XCIA

August 25, 2010 ·
Filed under: 10003, 10009, East Village, East Village Manhattan, Street Art 

From 4th Avenue.

Miss Heather

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