New York Shitty Pay Phone Du Jour: Al Fresco Hot Desking edition

December 10, 2015 ·
Filed under: 10009, 10012, East Village, East Village Manhattan, Street Furniture 

Al fresco office nys

Pay Phone Broadway at East 13 Street nys

Taken December 10, 2015.

From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: Feral Furniture

August 10, 2015 ·
Filed under: 10002, 10003, Feral Furniture, Urban Artifact 

WeCanBeTogether

Taken by David Sierra.

New York Shitty Street Feral Furniture Watch: Banker Street

Street Seating Banker Street 61015 nys

Taken June 10, 2015.

Urban Artifact: Wish Fulfillment!

CBS screencapSo over the last week we have had:

1. Time Warner employee sex at the Newtown Creek Nature Walk.*

2. Some blue chip public urination at Graham Avenue’s B43 bus stop thrown in for good measure

3. Indecent exposure (as seen at left) on our very Crosstown Local.

Yes, gentle readers, I’d say things are hoppin’.  So much so I lament not seeing my share of the action. Obviously I have been not at the wrong place at the right time. I shared my disappointment with my public urination tipster. To wit, he/she replied:

Awwww Heather. I just know there’s an exposed penis out there for you too. And I bet when you see it, it’ll be the longest one of all. :)

Today it finally happened— in a manner of speaking. Thankfully it did not involve lewd public acts and I actually had the choice of looking— or not. Read on!

371 Stagg Street nys

Ever had the feeling you’re being watched? Today while strolling along Stagg Street I did.

Stagg Street Art Object nys

Sure enough I was right. So help me, but I can swear this fellow was beckoning me to come closer.

Big Head nys

So I did.

Pitching a tent nys

As you can see my new friend is, to use vulgar parlance, “pitching a tent”. Let’s go in!

Little Head nys

What a piece of work is a man! How noble in reason, how infinite in faculty! In form and moving how express and admirable! In action how like an Angel! in apprehension HOW LIKE A GOD!

— William Shakespeare, emphasis mine— Ed. Note.

I can only imagine what the provenance of this item is. A remnant of some hitherto unknown bacchanalian Industrial Business Zone ritual, perhaps?

Heres looking at you kid nys

Here’s looking at you, kid…

Closing on a somewhat related note, your’s truly discovered and acquired a most fascinating product recently. I present without further ado, Peni Fresh!

The FRESHMAKER nys

soapActually I acquired a few bars— much to the amusement of the staff at said deli/grocery. One was a birthday present (said birthday boy was present), the others will be stocking stuffers. The holiday season will be upon us soon enough and let’s face facts: nothing says “Good will toward your fellow man” quite like telling them, however subtly, that they need to wash their tackle. I have yet to discern exactly what is meant by “TUTTI-FRUITTI” flavor. Methinks I’ll leave that task to Ralphie. Those of you who want to upgrade your mere dingus to a dicksicle, methinks I have found the product to make it happen. Cheers!

Peni Fresh: the Freshmaker!

*surveillance footage of which was requested by and is apparently making the rounds through the Newtown Creek Monitoring Committee!

New York Shitty Street Seating Du Jour: Sultan

August 30, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Street Furniture 

Sultan nys

From Dobbin Street.

New York Shitty Street Seating Du Jour: Adapt & Overcome!

McGuinness street seating 1 nys

If there is one thing I have observed in my years living in the Garden Spot, it is this; its citizens are thoughtful and often quite resourceful. As the neighborhood has “changed” this has diminished somewhat— but as the above photo attests some of that “community spirit” persists. We you have just looked at, gentle readers, is an ad hoc piece of shuttle bus seating installed on the western side McGuinness Boulevard just a hop skip from Kent Street.

Bus Stop Seating nys

The selection of chair is welcoming, even downright cheerful. Just want a tired commuter would want to see while negotiating our mass transit system, In terms of style (if not capacity), it far surpassses its kindred in Long Island City. But would I expect anything less of our fair burgh? Of course not! Last but hardly least —the piece de resistance, if you will— is additional measure taken so as to discourage theft.

AntiTheft Device nys

This is, naturally, a coordinating/”re-purposed” red brassiere. I give this arrangement two enthusiastic New York Shitty thumbs up. Bravo!

 

New York Shitty Feral Furniture Watch: Special Evel Knievel Edition

Sofa ramp nys

Ramp nys

Sofa Cum Skateramp NYS

Signs of recreation as discovered during today’s sojourn in parts Bushwick and beyond. Yours truly can only wonder if this will be next…

New York Shitty Street Seating Du Jour: Metropolitan Avenue

October 4, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11211, Street Furniture, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

Met Ave

sofawithfoodcart

Taken September 30, 2013.

New York Shitty Street Seating Du Jour: Tagged

September 17, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Street Furniture 

freemanstreet

From Freeman Street.

New York Shitty Street Seating Du Jour: Better Homes & Garbage

chaise2

chaise1

decorating

inspirabilityVERT

From River Street.

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