Brace Your Buttplugs, Fellow Greenpointers!

September 27, 2007 by
Filed under: Area 51 

First it was Starbucks. Then it was Sotheby’s. Now it is…

Ricky’s

Ricky’s?!?

Truth be told, this addition to the neighborhood does not upset me. Aside from Zoe’s Beauty Salon & Spa (which is fantastic, by the way— Toni gives great cuts) there are few providers of fun cosmetics and girly stuff here. I suppose some of the Polish stores offer them, but the customer service at such places (for non-Polish people, anyway) is severely lacking. If I wanted to be treated like the human equivalent of a herpes chancre I’d go to the Upper East Side, thank you very much.

In fact, this will be a godsend to all Greenpointers who wish to shop for adult novelty items. As of the writing of this post, the only place offering them here is Just For Fun at 982 Manhattan Avenue. And I refuse to buy such items at a place that has this in the window.

When shopping for something to stick up my ass or gash, I my royal highness heinie demands a certain measure of class. I have standards. They may not be high ones, but they are standards nonetheless.

Per the above sign, Ricky’s will be up and running this December. Just in time for Christmas! Nothing says “Season’s Greetings” or “Happy Hannukah” like a brand-spanking new buttplug.

Miss Heather

Comments

One Comment on Brace Your Buttplugs, Fellow Greenpointers!

  1. berkeleygrosvenor on Fri, 28th Sep 2007 11:35 am
  2. Fear not, North Brooklynites. Ricky’s opened up on Montague Street a few weeks ago, and anal pleasures aside, it hasn’t been too disruptive. Sure, they had some stupid opening night garden party with a cheesy emcee. And they buried the vibrating merchandise in a basement, adults-only Red Light Section (a discreet bamboo screen protects junior’s eyes). But, when you need nail polish or a cheap wig, you’re no longer having to beat it into Manhattan. Who could ask for anything more?

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