Boobification Photos du Jour: Goin’ Downtown
Today I had the pleasure of meeting a friend (and overall very cool person) for lunch. The downshot was it was over by City Hall in Manhattan. I suspect I speak for many when I say this is not exactly my favorite part of town. I decided to sweeten the pot a little by bringing a couple of friends along. Here are the results.
When I got above ground at City Hall there was a flurry of activity. If all the camera men I saw were any indication I’d say they were prepping for a press conference. Probably regarding Bloomberg’s circuitous method of lifting Mayoral of term limits so he can run for a third term. This got me to thinking:
I wonder if there is any place on the premises where I could do my devilish work without becoming a “security risk”?
Sure enough I found one such spot right under my nose. Literally.
This is the great seal of the City of New York.
This is the great seal of the City Titties of New York boobified. SIGILLUM CIVITATIS NOVI BOOBUM!
Perhaps it’s because I was born in Texas but I’ve always had a thing for cowboys.
Especially the ones who chomp on a cigar while sporting a nice big rack. Those bad boys give me a lot to smile about, how about you?
Since I happened to be in the area I decided to check out Wall Street. It was packed wall to wall (no pun intended) with reporters preparing to relay the latest salvo of (most likely bad) news regarding our nation’s economy.
I suppose we have gone from a bull market to a bear market.
I mused to myself. It was at this moment that I had my eureka moment: I CAN CHANGE THINGS. To this end I purchased a roll of scotch tape and headed south without delay.
Behold, the Boob Market.
What effects Greenpoint effects Wall Street. Screw black Monday, let’s have a Pink and perky Wednesday!*
*I would be remiss if I didn’t say the most rewarding part of sticking a pair of tits on the Wall Street bull was not the final product (as nice as it is). Rather, it was the look on the tourists’ faces after I did it. It went down something like this.
Miss Heather: Excuse me, do you mind if I go next? It’s for an art project.
ASIDE: It was at this moment I realized:
A. These people are staring at me because I am holding a pair of rubber tits or
B. these people do not speak English.
Believe it or not, I think it was point “B.” Seriously.
Anyhoo, when I got done they just stood there in silence —save one tiny woman wearing a sari (who I would presume was from India). She found it quite amusing. Feeling like I should say something, I did:
Welcome to New York. Enjoy your stay.