Dung Of The Day: Special 34th City Council District Edition

(Or: God Bless the Internet)

That’s right folks, you read the title of this post correctly: “Dung of the Day”. Those of you who have followed New York Shitty for some time are undoubtedly aware that the initial premise of this site was documenting the rather pervasive problem with poop in my community. Over the years I have gone in a different direction. There are two reasons for this:

  1. As I became more attuned to the issues facing Greenpoint (and north Brooklyn, for that matter) and noticed they were not getting attention via the “mainstream media” I decided that this blog would be an excellent means raising awareness about them.
  2. I have seen so much magnificent merde— be it human, canine or otherwise— that quite frankly I have become acclimatized to it. I have become a shit snob.

Well, today while walking around Bushwick that changed.

To preface: today I met up with a buddy of mine who resides in the 34th City Council District. This person has been generous enough to save and share the manifold number of Vito Lopez campaign material which has found its way to his/her mailbox. This, of course, includes the infamous example of Team Gropez’s rather interesting use of Photoshop. The “plan” was to take a tour of the 34th and its Industrial Business Zone. Yours truly played “tour guide”. Granted, I do not actually reside in the 34th— but neither does Mr. Lopez for that matter and I digress.

One part of our peregrinations was Melrose Street. There we saw an affordable housing project being built at the behest of the Ridgewood Bushwick Senior Citizens Council. Just a Snapple bottle’s toss away we found something so extraordinary it merited a mention on this blog. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

MelroseStreet

 

This is one of two homeless encampments to be found on said street. As you can see, something has gone very wrong.

30inchesofshit

 

Unfortunately, I did not have the presence of mind to tote along a tape measure. Thus, I had to repurpose a locally-sourced, gently used bottle of Snapple so as to establish a sense of scale. Regardless, this is rather impressive once one gets past the revulsion/”upchuck” factor. I can assure you, gentle readers, I came to the estimate of 30″ in a very deliberate— if not exactly scientific— fashion. More specifically: when I arrived back at Chez Shitty I ran a Google search for “How tall is a bottle of Snapple?” The following speaks for itself.

YahooAnswers

 

But let’s get back to the conclusion on this tale of turdage. My travelling companion and I continued our walk down Melrose. As we did we noticed a number of Maritza Davila posters. That’s when my friend noted:

Too bad you didn’t take that Lopez mailer with you.

My reply was as follows:

Oh, but I did!

gropezwithexplosiveshit

“Ouch” indeed…

Comments

2 Comments on Dung Of The Day: Special 34th City Council District Edition

  1. Peter on Thu, 29th Aug 2013 7:43 pm
  2. I believe that was a case of the Hershey Squirts.

  3. missheather on Thu, 29th Aug 2013 7:47 pm
  4. Whatever it is (was), it is truly epic.

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