Cutting Karl Fischer’s Krap

December 14, 2007 by
Filed under: Area 51, Dung of the Day, Greenpoint Magic, Other Shit 

I recently checked out a post on Brownstoner announcing yet another piece of Karl Fischer crap slated to blight north Brooklyn:

A visit to the Karl Fischer website never disappoints! In our most recent fly-by, we noticed that the ubiquitous architect has a new rendering posted of a 26,000-square-foot, 18-unit glass box that’s slated for the southwest corner of Bedford Avenue and South 4th Street in Williamsburg.

What will this forthcoming masterpiece look like you, ask? Well, here it is.

120 S. 4 Street via Brownstoner

True to form, it is a drab— if conspicuously short— slab of Post Modernist shit. Naturally, the lack of height was not lost one Brownstoner commenter:

Ridiculously small building for an area so close to Manhattan. My god, even Mayor Bloomberg’s townhouse is taller than this thing.

It looks alright, but it should be twice as large, at least.

WRONG!

Keeping this building diminutive is the only means I can think of to mitigate its hideousness. And contrary to what Karl Fischer said in this article, all his buildings have one overriding quality in common: they are uglier than homemade sin.

130 Diamond Street

That’s what makes parts of Brooklyn so special. You have all of these rowhouses, townhouses, smaller-scale developments, more neighborhood-friendly developments. You have more open space. The quality of life in this way is going to be preserved in Brooklyn.

– Karl Fischer

Am I the only person who has trouble reconciling the aforementioned quote with the “deeds” of its author? 130 Diamond Street is, most assuredly, neither “smaller scale” nor “neighborhood friendly”. It is a gangrene-colored six story eyesore blighting what was once a quaint block of two and three story rowhouses.

Krappy Klose-up

Why in god’s name would some pair this “brick work” with green sheet metal? This juxtaposition would make I.M. Pei roll in his grave.

Karl’s Krap Klose-up

If he was dead, that is. And dead he would be if forced to look at this pile of shit. Yes sir, when the construction fence finally comes down we Greenpointers are going to have one VERY UGLY BUILDING on our hands. An edifice which, until recently, reminded me of something but I just couldn’t place it. Until today.

Karl’s Krapper

Be sure to do a courtesy flush, Karl!

Miss Heather

120 S. 4th Street Photo Credit: Karl Fischer web site via Brownstoner.

Comments

One Comment on Cutting Karl Fischer’s Krap

  1. rexlic on Sat, 15th Dec 2007 11:18 am
  2. “Edifice” wrecks, Porta-Potty-style!

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