I’m Back!

November 16, 2006 by
Filed under: Area 51 

Words cannot adequately convey* the housing-related hell I have been through the last two weeks. Simply put, one call to 311 regarding unlicensed electrical work precipitated my entire building having neither heat nor hot water for AN ENTIRE WEEK. This whole sordid affair (in which even the NYC Marathon is a player) reached its (il)logical conclusion this week with Brooklyn Borough President Marty Markowitz calling me on my cell phone while I was on the toilet.

John Lennon was quoted as saying “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” My life seems to happen when I’m busy trying to take a shit in the privacy of my own home.

That said, I am (slowly) getting back to giving the scoop on the poop here in New York Shitty. In the meantime, I present the following pithy modification of a New York City Subway poster I spied recently.

Staten Island, NJ

Miss Heather

*But I’m gonna give it a shot so help me god. I need to purchase more beer first. Stay Tuned. You will NOT be disappointed.


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