From The New York Shitty Inbox: I Asked For Ugly…

June 3, 2009 by
Filed under: Abjectecture, Brooklyn, Williamsburg 

and well, I got it.


I have christened the above King’s Crap “The Gruesome Twosome” but I’ll let the contributor of this craptastic combo, Vintage James, take it from here:

You want ugly, I’ll show you ugly. Since I know that you have a thorough understanding of the true meaning of fugly, I submit this for your viewing displeasure. These turdbits sit side by side on E. 19th St. Between Quentin Rd. and Ave. R in Brooklyn, an area that is correctly called Homecrest but may be referred to as Midwood, Madison or Sheepshead Bay, depending on which ethnic group the condo market is trying to lure on any particular day.

The Baby Shit Building on the left may have been inspired by the Ex-Lax Building on Atlantic Ave., with some Nathan’s mustard thrown in. As for the Cyclops Building on the right, I’m afraid to guess. But we should not overlook the real benefit of these architectural misadventures–they are right next to each other, so we can pause and shift our focus from one bad idea to another.

I accept your challenge for the ugliest, and issue a throw-down–show me two or more adjacent buildings that are fuglier than these.

I have to admit these bad boys are pretty ugly. But somehow I find myself drawn to the one to the right. To quote Darth Vader:

I sense something. A presence I’ve not felt since…

well, I took a walk on the Southside yesterday afternoon! “Midwood” Mini Me, meet your long lost (and much bigger) brother.


I initially thought 275 South 1st Street was a Karl Fischer creation by virtue of its sheer ugliness and lack of context. I was wrong. This beauty comes courtesy of Leonid Krupnik, P.E.


The filing agent for this abomination was, amusingly enough, Sergey Drabkin. How very drab indeed!


Cold war ambiance in the heart of Williamsburg. Before Perestroika one would have to patronize a high-end government-owned and operated hotel in Eastern Europe (preferably Albania or Bulgaria) to savor something this gray and depressing. Now you don’t have to.  The workers’ playground of yesterday is yours today! Right here in New York City and at very capitalist (READ: Manhattanesque) prices!

Brooklyn: 4
Queens: 1 (the L Haus)

Bring on the crap, Crappy! I’m beginning to think you’re getting soft. What’s more, I don’t want to go head on into this race to the bottom alone. 😉

Miss Heather


3 Comments on From The New York Shitty Inbox: I Asked For Ugly…

  1. Rebecca11222 on Wed, 3rd Jun 2009 9:34 pm
  2. If I am going to be forced to live in East Berlin, then I want nationalized healthcare to pay for the scars on my retinas that shit like this causes.

  3. SpillConspirator on Wed, 3rd Jun 2009 10:08 pm
  4. Here’s “Gruesome” One in it’s alternate universe.

  5. Duke87 on Fri, 5th Jun 2009 1:18 pm
  6. “P.E.” stands for “Professional Engineer”. Are you sure you’ve named the architect of 275 South 1st and not the structural engineer? Because it’s the architect you have to blame for it being ugly. The engineer is who you blame if it collapses.

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