Dung of the Day

February 8, 2007 by
Filed under: Dog Shit, Dung of the Day 

Today’s “Dung of the Day” can be found in front of the Murder Bar (better known to non-locals as “Tommy’s Tavern”) on Freeman Street at Manhattan Avenue.

Smooshy Poop

Shitastic!

Otherwise, I have parsed through Cafe Press’s merchandising opportunities (for New York Shitty) and found the following products of particular interest:

  1. Doggie coats: for the obvious reasons.
  2. Baby bibs: because what goes in the front inevitably finds its way out the back. I’m considering offering a rebate to Park Slope parents if they purchase and USE this item. Naturally, I will demand photographic evidence that the latter came to pass.
  3. Postage stamps: pay off your student loans with style!
  4. Thong underwear: although I have never been a fan of them, emblazoning the front of fannie floss with a pile of shit makes a certain amount of sense. Consider it a harbinger of things to come because I have little doubt that poo is exactly what you’ll find on the business end after you peel them off the wearer.

    And (to shamelessly steal a quip from Vice Magazine) I will not shave my hairy ass before modelling them. Perhaps I’ll even pull a Farrah and select a pair that is two sizes smaller to better showcase my assets.

This is not an idle threat: it’s a promise.

Hugs and pisses,

Miss Heather

Comments

One Comment on Dung of the Day

  1. scaredy_kat on Sun, 11th Feb 2007 6:03 pm
  2. As much as I love shit (truly–I live on the shittiest street in Carroll Gardens), I want more Chicken Bone Calvalcade (no comments are allowed on that page which is why I’m blabbing off topic here). I’ve been in NYC nearly a decade and I’m still impressed/horrified by the amount of chicken bones on the ground.I thought it was a local only thing until I saw sidewalk bones in Nashville a few years ago.

  • NYS Flickr Pool

    Candy CanesSanta PedicabLook outManhattan Bridgehey, what goes on in this alley?good thing we are by the jail and courts! Halloween scarea dancer has moved ona fry for the road
  • Ads