East Williamsburg Abjectecture Du Jour: Presenting The Rapunzel Building

February 24, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11206, Abjectecture, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn 

This fulsome fortification hails from 36 Scholes Street. I have nicknamed it the Rapunzel building due to its rather medieval looking parapet and Juliette style balconies. While unfinished, one can envision a quartet of Rapunzels lowering their golden tresses to their respective princes even now. But what kind of princes would come calling to this edifice, you ask?

The kind who wield sharpie markers, that’s who!

Awww, now that’s just sweet! I can’t quit you either, 36 Scholes Street!

In closing, I did a little poking around the Department of Building’s Building Information System. I made a number of interesting (but hardly surprising) discoveries. Among them peeps behind this property owe several thousand dollars in fines for various and sundry offenses. Follows is the most intriguing:

Who knew the Department of Buildings had the authority to issue citations for illegal parking? I thought that was the stuff of the N.Y.P.D. You learn something new everyday in East Willie…

Miss Heather

East Williamsburg Abjectecture Du Jour: 94 Scholes Street

Every so often I like to include the Mister in my activities. Sometimes my reasons for doing so are laudable, sometimes they aren’t. Last night falls into the former category. You see, as I was walking down Scholes Street yesterday afternoon I saw something that profoundly disturbed me. Wishing to know if I was merely having a fit of pique, I decided to get the Mister’s  take.

Me: What do you think of this?


The Mister: Ew.
Me: What gets me is this they actually tried to make it look nice. Or at least they thought they were making it look nice.
The Mister: It looks like they bought that building by the yard.

This is one of the most hideous things I have ever seen. There, I said it. I feel much better now.

Miss Heather

Great Moments In Real Estate Advertising: Manhattan Style Living

January 26, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11211, Abjectecture, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

I almost shot hot chocolate out of my nose when I saw this corker on Broadway this blustery afternoon. Granted, I have not been to Manhattan lately but this does not strike me being something one would ordinarily see there. At least not without a neighborhood association or two raising holy hell first. No sir, masterpieces of this caliber are almost exclusively an outer-borough affair.

I would also be remiss if I didn’t point out that this advertisement’s claim that this excrescence is “new construction” is somewhat disingenuous. Believe it or not this building was once a carbon copy of its neighbor to the left. Now it is “Manhattan Style Living”. Lucky us.

Miss Heather

Retail Space For Rent On Franklin Street!

December 1, 2008 ·
Filed under: Abjectecture, Greenpoint Magic, Vomit 

WOW. 500 -3,400 square feet sounds pretty phat. As does 1,400 – 5,200 square feet of “professional space”. But there’s one hitch…

it hasn’t been built yet.

Here’s a photograph of floor one of Karl Fischer’s 200 Franklin Street Frankenfinger . It was taken November 27, 2008. Do you honestly think these clowns are going to have this floor (much less a second floor of “professional space” and the heap of crap above it) completed by February 2009? Really?

But I suppose hope GREED springs eternal.

Miss Heather

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