New York Shitty Day Ender: It’s Move In Day At 239 Banker Street!

May 31, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 


On May 31, 2009 Anonymous wrote:

i saw residents moving into the illegal, non-c-of-o, stop work ordered 239 Banker (neighbor of 259 Banker Street— better known as Studio B*— the edifice graced with the blue sidewalk shed in the background of the above photograph— Ed. Note) yesterday afternoon. Saw the Uhaul, asked the question myself. called in the complaint. they are advertising on C(raigs)L(ist):


Indeed they are! (To view a larger image click on the above jpg or any of the following jpgs.) What’s more, this hotel— oh, I mean loft— has its own web site! Here are some highlights:


Most importantly, no matter what time of day you come home, there will be a safe and cozy environment upon your return.

Hmm... this sounds kind of familiar. Wait— I remember— the Greenpoint Hotel has been advertising “safe and cozy” rooms for some time. Coincidence, you ask? Hardly: 239 Banker and the Greenpoint Hotel are both owned by my good buddy Max Stark! Let’s see what’s on the “Lofts” page, shall we?


From dinner parties to a quick fix after work, you’ll never be lacking space and functionality for your culinary excursions.

Heh, heh, heh… they said “fix”!


Ten minutes from the Bedford Avenue stop of the L? That’s kind of a stretch. But then again so is securing a permit from the Department of Buildings under the auspices of converting a manufacturing space into a “transient hotel”, offering two bedroom units for $2,100 a month in a building which— did I mention this already— has no Certificate of Occupancy?

Not that I really blame Max. If an illegal hostel can exist at 184 Eagle Street— for MONTHSdespite numerous complaints to the Department of Buildings why shouldn’t he get in on the fun?

But what would I know? My apartment building doesn’t have washer/dryer units on every floor. Maybe I should live in a hotel instead?

Miss Heather

UPDATE, June 2, 2009: After learning the very questionable legal status of 239 Banker Street Nicole has ceased to be the real estate agent for this property. No worries, now Liz is one the job…


and it would appear someone else is moving in.

*Whose rooftop terrace is still getting 311 complaints.

New York Shitty Videos Du Jour: And Baby Makes Three

May 31, 2009 ·
Filed under: Long Island City, Queens 


Yesterday evening the Mister and I paid a visit to Gantry State Park. It was lovely as always; the roses were in bloom, the tide was rolling in and the sunset cast shadows from the gantries which were absolutely gorgeous. Although you can anticipate more photographs from our sojourn later (so stay tuned!) the star of the evening was this little guy. Here are some videos I shot of baby learning the ropes— under the careful watch of mom and dad, of course— enjoy!

Shortly after shooting the above footage I learned the story about this, Long Island City’s cutest family, from a most interesting source: a couple of rather tough looking chaps watching with rapt interest was they swam by.

Tough Dude #1: There used to be three of them but the others didn’t make it.
Tough Dude #2: Aw, man! I hope he does.

It just goes to show it’s always the ones you least expect. What a couple of softies!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: The Garden Spot

May 31, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 






From Green & Huron Street.

Miss Heather

Real Estate Rhetoric Explained: One Hunters Point

May 31, 2009 ·
Filed under: Long Island City, Queens 

likearocketI have long wrestled with exactly what the fuck the advertising wizard were getting at with this advertising campaign (as shown to the left).

Commute like a rocket

might seem pretty snappy on paper, but in reality it sounds kind of stupid. I suppose they’re were trying to get at how fast one can get into Manhattan from this location. Or are they? Being from a particular generation whose memories of space travel are less than cheerful I have my doubts.

On that note I am pleased to announce that I walked by One Hunter’s Point yesterday evening. And I think I have finally found the answer.


Meet the on-site sales office for One Hunter’s Point.


Now meet the rather unconventional sales tool located across the street.


I wonder if a defective O ring was to blame?




Miss Heather

East Williamsburg Street Art Du Jour: Friendly Fire

May 31, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Street Art, Williamsburg 


From McKibben Street.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: A Shooting On Bedford Avenue?

May 31, 2009 ·
Filed under: Williamsburg 

Elizabeth writes:

hi miss heather,

wasn’t sure where to send a note to you… as im still sleepy on this sunday morning. but i was wondering if you have heard anything about the supposed (said my cabby) shooting on bedford and n. 6th last night? the street was blocked off and it looked pretty serious, but of course nobody knew anything …. and of course, i cant find anything online.

thanks for your help- and thanks for your awesome blog!!!


Anyone out there have the scoop? If so please share via comments. This is some scary stuff— especially now that they’ve brought back the pedestrian mall and this street is teeming with even more people.

Miss Heather

UPDATE 6:38 p.m.: It would appear there was a bomb threat (see comments). Well, that’s a relief!

P.S.: For the record I was in Long Island City last night and have an air-tight alibi. 😉

Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: The Other Number Of The Beast

May 31, 2009 ·
Filed under: Williamsburg 


From Wythe Avenue.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Starter: Couples

May 31, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Long Island City, Queens 




Gantry State Park, Long Island City



Manhattan Avenue, Greenpoint

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: Saturday Night On The G

May 30, 2009 ·
Filed under: Crosstown Local, Long Island City, Queens 


From the Smith – 9th bound Crosstown Local at Court Square.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: More People In My Neighorhood

May 30, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 








From McCarren Park & Manhattan Avenue

Miss Heather

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