Greenpoint Photo du Jour: The Zebramobile

July 19, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

From Driggs Avenue.

Miss Heather

Am I A Real Greenpointer Now?

July 19, 2008 ·
Filed under: Crazy People, Greenpoint Magic 

(Or, it’s a full moon in Greenpoint)

The one subject I am rapidly tiring of is the issue of what makes a “real” citizen of (insert neighborhood here). Some were born in New York Shitty, and yes, some have even died here! It’s what’s in between that seems to be the pickle. At what point has one lived in a given neighborhood (in this case, Greenpoint) long enough to earn “street cred” from the self-appointed guardians of citizenship? I neither know the answer of this question nor do I care to learn it. To fixate upon the past is to ignore the present and abrogate one’s responsibility to shape the future. Which brings me to a Greenpoint incident of note from yesterday, July 18.

When I arrived at the junk shop I noticed something balled-up in a plastic bag. It was a wig. I pulled it out and looked at it.

Me (to a co-worker): This looks pretty ratty. Methinks I am going to throw it in the dumpster. That way we’ll see some crazy person wearing it in the neighborhood tomorrow.

ASIDE: Before I continue I would like to clarify something. The dumpster at the junk shop is arguably as popular as the store itself. Not only do people see fit to use it as a trash repository (such as the psychic next door* who once saw fit to dump her barbecue grill, replete with smoldering briquettes in it July 4th), but it is rifled through on a nightly basis by people who either do not know what has been placed in there (trust me, some of it was rather gross) or do not care.

Now jump forward to last night. It is 8:45 p.m. and I am headed down Manhattan Avenue to meet some friends for dinner. True to form, dumpster diving was well underway…

and the dude doing the diving was wearing said wig.

Is it just me or does this man bear an uncanny resemblance to Ron Jeremy?

Close but no cigar: my prognostication was off by approximately three hours. I may very well be on my way to becoming a real Greenpointer, but clearly I still have a ways to go.

Miss Heather

*Who has a habit of buying large quantities of lotto tickets. If this woman was truly psychic why hasn’t she won by now?

Overheard In Greenpoint…

July 18, 2008 ·
Filed under: Crazy People, Greenpoint Magic 

(Or: Be A L-Trainer Or Just Act Like One)

Ordinarily I would submit something like the following to Overheard In New York. But given its particularly Greenpoint nature I am publishing it here. Mr. Heather and I overheard this last night while walking to the Black Rabbit.

Young 20-something chick to her clique of nubile comrades on Huron Street at Manhattan Avenue:

If I lived here I’d walk to the L train.

That’s over a mile, honey. Do you think you can do that in heels?

Miss Heather

Map Credit: Google

Greenpoint Photo du Jour: Putting The “Fun” Back in Dysfunctional

July 18, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

From Huron Street.

Miss Heather

Reminder: Williamsburg Walks

July 18, 2008 ·
Filed under: Williamsburg 

Bedford Avenue will have no vehicular traffic from North 9th Street to Metropolitan Avenue for the next four weekends. Be sure to plan accordingly!

Miss Heather

Borixon Is Back!

July 18, 2008 ·
Filed under: Area 51, Greenpoint Magic 

Thanks to the Polish Hip-Hop Festival I have developed a fascination for the rhyming sensation that is Borixon. Until yesterday (when I learned he and his homeboy “Mr. Renaissance” will be kicking it old school style in the tri-state area soon) I never understood why: my affection for The Trailer Park Boys!

On the left is Borixon, Polish rapper and all around badass. On the right is J-Roc, one of my favorite characters* from the Trailer Park Boys.

It is rather difficult to describe the glory that is this show. Simply put, the Trailer Park Boys is about about a bunch of petty criminals/high school drop-outs who live in the Sunnyvale Trailer Park in Nova Scotia. Their passions are (as best as I can describe them) trying to make easy money, getting drunk and eating chicken fingers. Though filmed in Canada, the humor is easily understood by Americans. Including Greenpointers!

Photo Play has an extensive collection of Trailer Park Boys episodes. By all means rent them. They are hilarious!

Photo Play
928 Manhattan Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11222

(718) 383-7782

Here’s a snippet from one of my favorite episodes: F**k Community College. Let’s get Drunk And Eat Chicken Fingers. Enjoy!

Miss Heather

*The other being Bubbles.

THIS WEEKEND: Back(yard) Sale at 99 Java Street

July 18, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

I am very hinky about buying used box springs, but the 1940′s armoire with side table, schoolhouse chair set and circus posters sound pretty neat.

<back>yard sale*
July 19 & 20, 11:00 a.m. – 6:00 p.m.
99 Java Street
Brooklyn, New York 11222

Miss Heather

*Not to be confused with backdoor man

Introducing The New York Loft Hostel!

July 17, 2008 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Williamsburg 

I happened across this flier at the Northside Pharmacy today while running errands. After recoiling from yet another gratuitous use of the grossly over-used term loft, all I could muster in the way of a response was What the fuck?!? As soon I got home I looked at their web site. What I found was quite interesting. Amenities include:

  1. Free Internet
  2. Free parking
  3. Free cable television
  4. Free long distance calling
  5. A 2,000 square foot garden replete with jacuzzi and pool is promised in the future
  6. Manufacturing space for upstairs and downstairs neighbors

Well, I actually learned point #6 by checking out the Department of Buildings’s web site. I guess at $25.00 a night this is a pretty good deal. Unless of course someone beats you senseless at the conveniently located Morgan Avenue stop of the L and steals your wallet.

Miss Heather

P.S.: Check out their advertisement on Craigslist! They’ve lowered it to $19.00 a night! WHAT A DEAL!

Lest the previous has been pulled you can see it by clicking here.

From The Greenpoint Grapevine

July 17, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

I have it on reliable intelligence that the owners of Jack O’Neills (wishing to go back to Ireland) have placed the business up for sale. In fact, I was told it has been on the market for some time. I have no idea what they are asking in the way of a price for this beautifully appointed business but I suspect it might be a tough sell given there are currently six bars on Franklin Street with another two in the works. That makes eight drinking establishments on this street. Nine if you include the Greenpoint Coffeehouse. Yikes!

Miss Heather

Question Of The Day

July 17, 2008 ·
Filed under: Williamsburg 

Let’s pretend for a moment that you are organizing an event at McCarren Park. In this case, Slacro Fest “an eco-conscious fundraiser with all proceeds going to support The Mindfulness Challenge”. You want to get the word out, so you print out a bunch of fliers— and I mean a BUNCH of them. Now it is time to get the word out. You can:

  1. Post them in the usual places, e.g.; on light poles, fire alarms, storefronts, etc.
  2. Staple them on trees surrounding McCarren Park
  3. Both of the above.

If you picked 3 you are absolutely correct, albeit it not environmentally so!

This flier graces a tree on Bedford Avenue.

This flier graces a tree on North 12th Street.

As does this one…

and this one.

Perhaps I am splitting hairs here, but this strikes me as being decidedly NON eco-friendly behavior.

Just a thought.

Miss Heather