New York Shitty Day Ender: Dessert

August 30, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bronx, Street Art 

cupcake

From White Plains Road, Bronx.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Slide Show Du Jour: Morris Parkitecture

August 30, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bronx 

Van NestNYS

One of the cool things about Morris Park is a walk around the neighborhood is like going back in time. Many of its storefronts have hardly been touched in 30, 40 and perhaps even 50 years. Follows is a selection of my favorite sights from today’s day trip. Enjoy!

Tomorrow I will conclude my Morris Park sojourn with a little food porn.

Miss Heather

Morris Park Photos Du Jour: Signs

August 30, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bloomblight, Bronx, Dog Shit Signage 

As I indicated previously, today the Mister and I took our “staycation” to the Bronx. The objective of this trip was partake of real, honest-to-god Italian food in New York City’s lesser known “Little Italy”. I will go into the gustatory part of our trip a little later. This post is going to focus on the great variety of signage to be found in my former stomping grounds.

There were plenty run-of-the-mill signs of pick up your dog poo/stay of my lawn variety to be certain. On the other hand there were a quite few that stood head and shoulders above the others— or simply made you scratch your head and say “What the fuck”? Enjoy!

White Plains Road

JC

walk

This is not a sign per se, but it does make light of a failure to communicate.

obamaspecial

Morris Park Avenue

stimulus

A very Morris Park stimulus plan.

WOW

It’s the economy stupid!

I cannot find the words to describe this one. That’s why I shot video instead!

BTU

MJ and BTUS

nohangie

Not here to shop? If so, this bodega says beat it!

Haight Avenue

kamikaze

weheart

DONOT

Rhinelander Avenue

Rhinelander

blight

This sight made me feel right at home.

fuck

Nothing like some good ol’ Bloomblight to bring two boroughs together! (For those of you who are wondering, the inside looks even worse than the outside.) But back to signs— and the strangest pair of messages I have ever seen gracing a single storefront. The following hail from 1084 Morris Park Avenue.

YOUGET

Sure, this one seems simple enough— but look at its companion found six feet to the left.

HIV

The stars-n-stripes, Lady Liberty and… HIV?

And with this puzzler I will conclude this installment of my Morris Park adventure. Next up: a selection of Morrisparkitecture. Stay tuned!

Miss Heather




New York Shitty Day Starter: Would You Buy A Used Car From This Man?

May 27, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bronx 

As I mentioned yesterday after our jaunt to Morris Park we headed over to Little Italy/Fordham. Sort of. You see, we did not know where we were going. At one point we ended up at the Bronx Zoo. We got out via a street called Boston Road which is where I found the following.

the-real-deal

I got a big chuckle out of this sign.

realdeal2

Especially since someone was parked in the spot in question and had not been towed.

used-cars

Then I noticed who the presided over this establishment was and abruptly stopped laughing.

jesus

None other than the king of kings himself. This begs the question as to why he is trifling with a towing company. Why not give dear old dad a ring and have that S.U.V. turned into a much more eco-friendly pillar of salt?

No amount of ticketing or towing is going to deter the drivers of our fair city, whether they man two wheels or four, from behaving like selfish assholes. But if one (hint, hint) were to go Old Testament on their asses things might— just might— change.

Miss Heather

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