The Word On The Street: Presenting “Fuck You” Friday

It’s been a pretty busy week for yours truly. Today, however, I was able to take a day off to do a few things I wanted to do (versus stuff I have to do). I have had a lot of “have to dos” lately.

Upon disembarking the L at First Avenue in the East Village I, courtesy of LinkNYC, was presented with this self-care “tip”: call a friend.

No, no sir (or madam) this is simply not how it works here”, I thought to myself. “Telling someone to fuck off IS self-care.”

Believe you me, I want to tell quite a few folks to do just that nowadays. However, “punching up” could get me in (more) trouble. “Punching down” is not my style. “Punching laterally”, however, is fair game in my opinion.

If you need it— “it” being anything imaginable and beyond— New York City not only has it but will deliver it.

Right.
To.
Your.
Proverbial.
Fucking.
Doorstep.

We pay top dollar for this amenity. This is something outsiders do not understand. The freedom, the mental health benefits, which come with letting it all out in public. Fellow New Yorkers let you do it. We take it in turns. It’s an understood thing.

Sure enough, I was presented with such an opportunity today. Here’s how I put it on Twitter:

Then it occurred to me:

Why not roll out a compendium of “Fuck Yous” in their manifold forms as I see them?

There’s no more replenishable, locally-sourced resource as “Fuck You” in New York City.

So here we go!

First Avenue, East Village
First Avenue, East Village
Delancey Street, Lower East Side
Houston Street, Lower East Side
Manhattan Avenue, Greenpoint
Freeman Street, Greenpoint

And last, but hardly least, this contender from none other than Clay Street, Greenpoint, U.S.A. While “Fuck You” is not explicitly stated, the sentiment is there.

That’s the whole trouble. You can’t ever find a place that’s nice and peaceful, because there isn’t any. You may think there is, but once you get there, when you’re not looking, somebody’ll sneak up and write “Fuck you” right under your nose. Try it sometime. I think, even, if I ever die, and they stick me in a cemetery, and I have a tombstone and all, it’ll say “Holden Caulfield” on it, and then what year I was born and what year I died, and then right under that it’ll say “Fuck you.” I’m positive, in fact.*

— J.D. Salinger, “Catcher in the Rye”

*I am totally amenable to “Fuck You” being inscribed on my tombstone. The more the merrier. A person is defined by his— or her— enemies.

The Word On The Street, Part I: Paradise

paradise

From Delancey Street.

New York Shitty Street Art Du Jour: It’s The Law!

May 31, 2012 ·
Filed under: 10002, Lower East Side, Lower East Side Manhattan, Street Art 

From Delancey Street.

The Word On The Street, Part II: Point/Counterpoint

Delancey Street, 10002

Manhattan Avenue, 11222

New York Shitty Slide Show Du Jour: Break On Through To The Other Side

This week I did something I have never done before: I walked across the Williamsburg Bridge to Manhattan. I saw a number of interesting things, including a man urinating off of said bridge. At one point he even rested his member on the rail so as to free his hand to forage for his cell phone. It was quite the sight, I assure you. If there is a lesson to be learned here it is this: if you are walking down South 6 Street near the waterfront, carry an umbrella. Or better yet: walk on the other side of the street.

In any case, here are some highlights from my sojourn to Manhattan. I have tossed in some shots from Chinatown as well. Enjoy!

You can view this slide show in large format by clicking here.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Pay Phone Du Jour: Fone Home

July 5, 2010 ·
Filed under: 10002, Lower East Side, Lower East Side Manhattan 

From Delancey Street.

Miss Heather

Spotted On Delancey Street: No Questions Asked

July 5, 2010 ·
Filed under: 10002, Lower East Side, Lower East Side Manhattan 

Lost pet fliers are a dime a dozen in this city. They break my heart. What makes this one all the more compelling is where I found it: Delancey Street. This is a long way from 21st Street where Sammy was last seen. As I was walking back to the L train I observed Sammy’s “people” have canvassed the entire Lower East Side and the East Village with these fliers soliciting his return. He is clearly loved and missed. If you have seen Sammy or know of his whereabouts please contact his owners at the above telephone number.

Thanks!

Miss Heather

Urban Fur: Chinatown Edition

April 22, 2010 ·
Filed under: 10002, Manhattan, New York City, Urban Fur 

I did not get the name of the magnificent beast (which hails from Chrystie Street). Neither he nor his keepers seemed very interested in talking to me. No worries, this 20+ pounder was busy keeping a vigilant watch over his domain!

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Starter: Old As Hills

February 24, 2010 ·
Filed under: Manhattan, New York City 

From Delancey Street.

Miss Heather

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