Live From Huron Street

August 22, 2019 ·
Filed under: 11221, Fuck This Shit, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

As I suspected, after last night’s storm the Dame sex toy ads are showing signs of distress. This is of course because they are wheat pasted paper affixed onto a construction fence.

I have asked Dame if these advertisements are theirs and if they had permission to post them on this fence. So far, radio silence.

Once again, the NYS code for graffiti:

S 145.60 Making graffiti.

  1. For purposes of this section, the term “graffiti” shall mean the etching, painting, covering, drawing upon or otherwise placing of a mark upon public or private property with intent to damage such property.
  2. No person shall make graffiti of any type on any building, public or private, or any other property real or personal owned by any person, firm or corporation or any public agency or instrumentality, without the express permission of the owner or operator of said property.
    Making graffiti is a class A misdemeanor. — ypd.com

If Dame ain’t claiming this as theirs or stating they had permission to post these advertisements on the fence in question, why does the 94th care?

Simple answer: they enforce/obey the law how they see fit. As such, I am arrested on a very tenuous charge at best— and the police later violate the law by trying to delete photos from my phone while it was in their custody. Tried.

What Not To Do This Weekend

August 20, 2019 ·
Filed under: 11222, Asshole, Fuck This Shit, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn 

UPDATE, 8/21/19: From a buddy of mine who contacted The Warsaw. Here what he had to say:

I just received a statement from The Polish National Home . The Polish National Home and Warsaw does not share the views that this man is talking about and that this event was advertised without our consent. CANCELLED!

If you all are looking for something to do this weekend, I would kindly like to recommend inquiring of the Warsaw why they provide a platform for holocaust deniers.* Yes, not only is this fellow a holocaust denier but he is the second one the Warsaw has provided a forum to this summer.

To get the full rundown as to what’s up with his dude, I strongly recommend you go to this Twitter string by Venture Communist and give it a read. Among other things, this fellow has been banned from YouTube for hate speech, believes Elie Wiesel is a fraud; believes Jews were active collaborators with the Nazis in the Holocaust and much, much more. Trust me folks, you will come away disgusted.

*Be sure to mention Marek, the manager. He handles the music side. He is apparently who is bringing these CHUDs in.

Rape Crisis Advocate Training

This was kicked to by my pal Deborah who was the woman/brains behind the Safe Ride Home Act. For those who may be interested, next month there will be training sessions for being a Rape Crisis Advocate at Wyckoff Heights Medical Center. Spread the word!

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: Huron Street

When is a stripped, abandoned car that’s been left on the street for over a month not a stripped, abandoned car that’s been left on the street for over a month?

When it is called art! Note this is located across the from the defaced sex toy ads of infamy. You know folks, priorities.

UPDATE, 8/21/19, 2:54 PM: I have received word this hilarious item has been removed. I went out and checked personally and IT WAS! See folks:

  1. If you make an abandoned car art, the police will remove it.
  2. Shaming WORKS!

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: Signs of the Times

The neighborhood sure is getting fancy. Of course there still is plenty of “wiggle room” for the properly motivated person to “act out”. Head down to Freeman Street by the Shit Tits and knock yourselves out fellow reprobates. Tell ’em Heather sent you.

XO

(Taken February 3, 2018)

Today At The Manhattan Avenue Kayak Launch: Four Years

It was four years ago to this day that a motor vehicle crashed through the guardrail gracing the Manhattan Avenue Kayak Launch. In the elapsing time this has not been repaired. I felt a “celebration” of sorts was in order and so it came to pass. Follows is footage I shot. Enjoy!

Part I: Introduction

Part II: Introduction/”Never Forget”

Part III: Fellow Greenpointers/Parks Users Weigh In

Part IV: Fellow Greenpointers/Parks Users Weigh In, Cont’d

Part V: Balloons!

Part VI/”Blooper”: The “4” Balloon Pops!

Next up: Jerzy Popieluszko Square!

Heidi’s Recovery Fund

Please take a moment to read Heidi’s story (of which the above screencaps are an excerpt), donate if you can and please spread the word. She really needs our help. As is the case with many people nowadays unfortunately, she stands to lose weeks of wages and is not insured so this accident (which is in and of itself traumatic enough) stands to be financially catastrophic to Heidi. Thank you for your time.

P.S.: Since we are on the subject of the intersection of India Street and Manhattan Avenue, I would like to present the following which I wrote fairly recently on this site (in regards to an email from the Department of Transportation regarding the “Manhattan Avenue Parking Spot of Death”, specifically some “Vision Zero” nonsense tacked onto said email):

Let’s consider pedestrian safety on the block in question. If “traffic enforcement” took the time/effort to, say, hang out at the intersection of India Street and Manhattan Avenue and ticket each and every motorist and bicyclist who blew through through the traffic signals located there they would make a tidy sum. They would also actually be doing something which does facilitate safer streets for pedestrians. But it is much easier to go after the long-hanging fruit of people parking in an ambiguously marketed parking space.

I wrote this on April 17, 2017. This accident came to pass May 10, 2017. Are the Department of Transportation and NYPD Traffic paying attention?

A Manhattan Avenue Park Spot Of Death Update: “Fixed”

April 18, 2017 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

This is what I was greeted with bright and early this morning. Per a witness, the Department of Transportation showed up at midnight so as to do this. They made a lot of noise too. In any case, here’s to not having to watch some unfortunate soul’s car getting towed, folks yelling at traffic enforcement agents upon discovering they have been ticketed, etc.

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Manhattan Avenue

A little value-added from my sojourn to the Manhattan Avenue Kayak Launch this morning. It should settle the question once and for all as to the whereabouts of Scooby Doo. He is under a car on Manhattan Avenue between Clay and Dupont Streets and appears to be hammered as fuck. Possibly via the contents of the now empty bottle of tequila in the adjacent tree pit.

Cheers!

Quicklink: And Now A Word From The New York Times

April 17, 2017 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Spring is here and with it— not unlike the swallows returning to Capistrano— the New York Times lavishes attention on my humble community. This being Greenpoint, of course. My colleague at Queens Crap found this interesting and saw fit to bring this tome to my attention as follows:

The Times discovers Polish people in Greenpoint.

To wit, I replied:

That pharmacy they have a photo of has a fierce selection of sex toys.

It’s true. This pharmacy does sport such items. To prove my point I strolled over there bright and early on this Smigus-Dyngus Day so as to get photo documentation. I feel it is my responsibility as a citizen journalist with “street level” knowledge of such things. Without further ado, here is what awaits you at the Murawski Pharmacy which, it should be noted, is the only establishment which sells such wares. “Just For Fun”, also a Polish-owned and operated, used to sell sex toys but it has closed. The owner, a lovely lady named Barbara, has retired and moved to Florida. The storefront has since become a CitiHabitats office. But I digress. Bring on the photos!

Here we are.

Welcome to the Wall of Sex. It is proving to be Wet Monday indeed. Hallelujah!

I rather like how stickers, including a price tag, have been employed so as to conceal the “naughty bits”. While I am on the subject of stickers…

Even the penis pumps hereabouts are purporting to be gluten free nowadays. If that ain’t a sign of gentrification I honestly do not know what is. And, yes, the New York Times made sure to conjure up the golem which is the “G word”. Among other things:

As in other parts of our city, conversations in Little Poland often turn to gentrification. Faced with higher rents, many residents are leaving the neighborhood for other Polish enclaves in Ridgewood or Maspeth, both in Queens.

I already knew this. A lot of people know this. But I suppose if one’s targeted “readership” are people who actually enjoy the Time’s “The Hunt” column— and not just for the gallows humor it provides— this would be “news”. The previous having been written, let’s get back to the topic. This being things Polish in Greenpoint. You see, Mr. Lee was not the only one walking around Greenpoint yesterday, I was too! And at McCarren Park I saw something quite compelling. So much so I took photos of it!

This is what greeted me upon arrival at Father Jerzy Popieluszko Square. It would appear a mishap of some kind has come to pass. I would hazard to guess this mishap involved a motor vehicle. Folks are always driving into things here. Pedestrians, fences, buildings, trees, more pedestrians, if you can think of it, chances are an automobile has hit it. Not even Newtown Creek is safe, as we learned on July 9th, 2013 via Gothamist.

Which brings me back to what I beheld at Jerzy Popieluszko Square yesterday. I found the manner, “style” if you will, eerily reminiscent of the “treatment” the Manhattan Kayak Launch has received “post injury”.

Save of course the “caution” tape.  I am guessing the powers-that-be (the Parks Department? Open Space Alliance North Brooklyn?) saw fit to appoint Jerzy Popieluszko Square with the tape (which costs $9.95 plus tax for a 1,000 roll of the stuff) because it is part of McCarren Park and as such is part of the “flagship park” of Community Board 1. Prestige is at stake, my friends.


Which brings me to the above photo. I wanted to make sure everyone is aware the photos of the Manhattan Avenue Kayak Launch in this post were taken today, April 17th, 2017. Yes, gentle readers, we are closing in on four years of this fence being in this state of disrepair. This begs the question as to how long the fence at Father Jerzy Popieluszko Square will remain in its present state. If the Manhattan Avenue Kayak Launch is any indication, I’d say the prognosis is not good.

The state of repair (or disrepair) of facilities in any given community speaks volumes about how the city and its various agencies views/”values” said community. Let’s apply this to Father Jerzy Popieluszko Square. Here you have a park dedicated to a fellow who is highly revered by the Polish community. As the New York Times has ascertained, Greenpoint has a rather substantial Polish community.

Let’s do the math. The premises have been damaged and a “make do” solution in the manner of two barricades and approximately 7-8 yards of caution tape. I am not sure what the barriers cost, but at 1 cent a foot the tape used cost 24 cents.  As for when this will be repaired, maybe someone in the “mainstream media” will ask the proper “authorities”? Perhaps even someone at the New York Times! You know, “watchdogs acting as guardian of the public interest” kind of stuff. I will leave you now with a few shots of the McCarren Park women’s comfort station. These too were taken yesterday, Easter Sunday.

(Insert “Wet Monday” joke here.)

UPDATE, 4:12 pm: Apparently the fence at Jerzy Popieluszko Square has been in this state for few months. Amazing how McCarren can get a tennis bubble, but basic shit like a fence languishes. Of course fences do generate $55.00 per hour in revenue.

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