Greenpoint
Lorven Pharmacy
Culture on the Cheap
Reader Participation Time: Snarkitecture
The Mister and I do not make it to Long Island City as much as we used to. There are a number of reasons for this. Among them:
- The weather. It’s been too cold to venture out.
- We have taken to going to Sunnyside and Jackson Heights instead. This is because…
- quite frankly we find Long Island City kind of depressing.
Ever since they demolished that beautiful old building at 10-62 Jackson Avenue and replaced it with a shiv-like structure we cannot cross the Pulaski Bridge without wincing. Luckily we had a craving for Italian food this weekend and decided to go to Manettas. As we made our way down the bridge we were presented with a most unexpected treat: 49-16 11 Street.
This stunning example of Strip Mall Italian (replete with a Donald Judd-esque elevator shaft) sent us into fits of uncontrollable laughter.
Where do you start with this? Hell, where do you finish for that matter?
For starters you have the lovely Juliet style balconies overlooking the on ramp of the Pulaski Bridge.
Just a beer bottle’s throw away from traffic (and perhaps the odd pedestrian or bicyclist).
Some attempt at symmetry has been made… but not quite enough. I christen this daring new style Art Sucko.
But no expense has been spared on Friedrichs boxes. This is a good thing. When the dull roar of truck traffic (at all hours) gets to be too much for our intrepid 49-16ers they can crank up the air conditioner to drown out the din.
The last time I saw something with this many studs on it was in the West Village. (WARNING: previous link is NSFW.)
No matter how hard I try my wit, gift for gab, whatever-you-want-to-call-it is not doing this stellar example of Fedderism justice. To this end I need your help. Although I realize this has been done before I am proposing the following: you, dear readers, tender LOL speak captions for this masterpiece. These can be left in the comments below or sent via email at: missheather (at) newyorkshitty (dot) com.
If I like what I see I’ll publish the pick of the litter right here on New York Shitty later this week.
Your immediate attention to this matter is greatly appreciated.
Happy snarking!
Miss Heather
Morning Photos Du Jour: Shadows
Leonard Street, Greenpoint.
Meserole Avenue, Greenpoint.
Driggs Avenue, Williamsburg.
Jackson Avenue, Long Island City.
Miss Heather
Subway Video Du Jour: The G Train Strut
As mentioned in this post, the Mister and I ventured to Long Island City for dinner last weekend. It was delicious (La Vuelta has yet to disappoint). But as with all things in life— be they good or bad— our evening came to an end. We needed to go home. This of course entailed taking the Crosstown Local. The G train. The “Gee, where is it”? The “Go nowhere” train. Call it what thou whilst.
Unlike many I do not take issue with the Crosstown’s lack of punctuality. In fact I am grateful for it’s zen-like service as it has worked wonders for taming my Type A personality. I was once an impatient and impetuous public transportation novice but the Jedi masters behind this line have seen fit to teach me a most valuable gift: patience. I take things a little slower and savor the little things in life nowadays. Like this guy.
(TIP: listen to “Jimmy James” or “No Sleep Til Brooklyn” by the Beastie Boys while watching the following.)
The Mister could not understand my fascination with this chap. He wanted to get home fast and was upset I was lagging behind. It ended up making no difference: shortly after this chap descended the stairwell our train was ready to go. It was as if the G waiting for him (and maybe it was— after all, this dude is cool beyond compare).
It just goes to show that some of us bear no shame whatsoever for being patrons of the Crosstown Local. Sure, we pretty much have to transfer to get anywhere— but it also gives us the opportunity to hold our heads up and roll out a most badass strut.
Bravo!
Miss Heather
Subway Photos Du Jour
From the Queens bound platform of the Crosstown Local at Metropolitan Avenue.
From the Smith – 9th bound platform of the Crosstown Local at Metropolitan Avenue.
From The Queens bound platform at 21st Street.
From the Manhattan bound platform of the E/V at 23rd Street – Ely Avenue.
Miss Heather
Long Island City Photo Du Jour: Baracked?
The Mister and I passed this tonight while walking to La Vuelta* for dinner. I say it’s Barack Obama. He says it isn’t. Draw your own conclusions.
Miss Heather
*Who, it should be mentioned, DOES deliver to Greenpoint!
Citypoint Photos Du Jour: From Newtown Creek With Love
From north Brooklyn’s (or southwestern Queens’s) Seine.
When I look westward to Manhattan I do not see a pretty skyline. Rather, I envision an infinite number of bowel movements, vomit and detritus that will soon find their way two blocks from my home.
Stand up and be counted, Greenpoint, for the shit you are about to receive!
Nobel prize winners, diplomats— PRESIDENTS— and Joey Arak* have graced my neighborhood with the by-products of their respective genius. Maybe I’ll pick up a fraction of their gifts via schnozmosis? I can only hope so. It’s been especially stanktastic of late.
The bigger the stench = the bigger the brain?
Miss Heather
*This is not necessarily sarcasm.
Crosstown Local Photos Du Jour: January 18, 2009
From the Greenpoint Avenue & Court Square stops of the G train.
Miss Heather
Reader Contribution Du Jour: G Is For…
Filed under: Bum Shit, Crosstown Local, Dung of the Day, Greenpoint Magic, Long Island City, Other Shit
Gee, that’s REALLY FUCKING GROSS.
This evening I received a most curious email from a gentleman named Angel. It was entitled “A step up from Dog Shit, as seen on the G on Court Sq.” and it read as follows:
Here’s my 2 cents for NewYorkShitty.com before 08 comes to an end…
Me and my family saw this (and laughed hard as I took out the camera without hesitation) on our way into the first G car on Court Sq. (headed towards Greenpoint of course) First thing that came to my mind. “This is so NewYorkShitty.com material”
Intrigued, I clicked my way over to Gubatron’s flickr page. The following is what awaited my delectation.
I have to confess: this image gave me goosebumps. They were not of the warm and fuzzy “I just had my first kiss” variety. Rather, it was more like the onset of a case of stomach flu —which I suspect is what the person who left this, the most piquant and direct critique of Crosstown Local service I have ever beheld, was probably experiencing. What’s more, it is one of the most disgusting things I have ever seen on the G train. And for the record, that includes two subway masturbators and this.
WAY TO GO GUBATRON!
The next time, dear readers, you get angry because you didn’t get a seat while commuting on our very own G train think of the above image. Sometimes it’s just better to stand.
Miss Heather
Photo Credit: Gubatron
NYS Flickr Pool
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