The Word On The Street: Presenting “Fuck You” Friday

It’s been a pretty busy week for yours truly. Today, however, I was able to take a day off to do a few things I wanted to do (versus stuff I have to do). I have had a lot of “have to dos” lately.

Upon disembarking the L at First Avenue in the East Village I, courtesy of LinkNYC, was presented with this self-care “tip”: call a friend.

No, no sir (or madam) this is simply not how it works here”, I thought to myself. “Telling someone to fuck off IS self-care.”

Believe you me, I want to tell quite a few folks to do just that nowadays. However, “punching up” could get me in (more) trouble. “Punching down” is not my style. “Punching laterally”, however, is fair game in my opinion.

If you need it— “it” being anything imaginable and beyond— New York City not only has it but will deliver it.

Right.
To.
Your.
Proverbial.
Fucking.
Doorstep.

We pay top dollar for this amenity. This is something outsiders do not understand. The freedom, the mental health benefits, which come with letting it all out in public. Fellow New Yorkers let you do it. We take it in turns. It’s an understood thing.

Sure enough, I was presented with such an opportunity today. Here’s how I put it on Twitter:

Then it occurred to me:

Why not roll out a compendium of “Fuck Yous” in their manifold forms as I see them?

There’s no more replenishable, locally-sourced resource as “Fuck You” in New York City.

So here we go!

First Avenue, East Village
First Avenue, East Village
Delancey Street, Lower East Side
Houston Street, Lower East Side
Manhattan Avenue, Greenpoint
Freeman Street, Greenpoint

And last, but hardly least, this contender from none other than Clay Street, Greenpoint, U.S.A. While “Fuck You” is not explicitly stated, the sentiment is there.

That’s the whole trouble. You can’t ever find a place that’s nice and peaceful, because there isn’t any. You may think there is, but once you get there, when you’re not looking, somebody’ll sneak up and write “Fuck you” right under your nose. Try it sometime. I think, even, if I ever die, and they stick me in a cemetery, and I have a tombstone and all, it’ll say “Holden Caulfield” on it, and then what year I was born and what year I died, and then right under that it’ll say “Fuck you.” I’m positive, in fact.*

— J.D. Salinger, “Catcher in the Rye”

*I am totally amenable to “Fuck You” being inscribed on my tombstone. The more the merrier. A person is defined by his— or her— enemies.

New York Shitty Photo Du Jour: Williamsburg Bridge

September 26, 2015 ·
Filed under: 10002, Lower East Side, Lower East Side Manhattan, Manhattan, New York City 

New York nys

I have grown to be a connoisseur of “street penises” over the years. Placement really is key. I would hazard to guess this person has spent a lot of time looking at penises. Possibly his own. I discern a measure of artistic training as well. The pubic hair is a nice touch. I don’t see that very often…

(Taken September 25, 2015.)


New York Shitty Photo Du Jour: The Word On The Street

The Bowery NYS

Taken September 25, 2015.


From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: Feral Furniture

August 10, 2015 ·
Filed under: 10002, 10003, Feral Furniture, Urban Artifact 

WeCanBeTogether

Taken by David Sierra.

New York Shitty Feral Mattress Watch: Peretz Square

Peretz Square nys

Taken August 3, 2015.

The Word On The Street, Part II: Houston Street

Houston Street nys

Taken May 7, 2015.

Reader Contribution Du Jour: What Is This?

January 19, 2015 ·
Filed under: 10002, BAD ASS, Lower East Side, Lower East Side Manhattan, Wow, WTF 

urbanassaultvehicle1 small

grill

UAV2nys

UAV3nys

This curiosity was found by a fellow Greenpoint resident we’ll call “S”. It presently resides under the Manhattan side of the Williamsburg(h) Bridge. About it she writes:

Double take: Giant flat black camper with window gates and fences chained on. The one of the door and window is worth a closer look…

Indeed it is.

Urban assault vehicle or Airbnb rental?

I am putting my money on both. Perhaps EVGrieve or Jeremiah can shed some light regarding this tenement on wheels? Anyone?

UPDATE: Someone was thoughtful enough to point out this looks like something from Escape From New York:

Great catch, John! The funny thing is this vehicle has New York state plates. However, I have spied and shot graffiti featuring Snake Plissken along the north Brooklyn waterfront. This one hails from Greenpoint.

SNAKE!

And this one hails from the Brooklyn side of the Williamsburg Bridge:

snakeplissken

Maybe they’re trying to escape from Brooklyn? Hmm…

New York Shitty Photo Du Jour: Spring Street

December 5, 2014 ·
Filed under: 10002, Lower East Side, Lower East Side Manhattan, Street Art 

Spring Street nys

Taken December 5, 2014.

New York Shitty Street Art Du Jour: The Word On The Street

Lottery nys

Taken December 5, 2014.

The Word On The Street, Part II: The Bowery

Spring Street nys

Taken September 24, 2014.

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