New York Shitty Day Ender: Never Forget

August 21, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Taken August 21, 2011.

Miss Heather

Spotted On Bedford Avenue: Absolut Brooklyn

It has come to my attention that the folks at Brownstoner have been speculating as to where the photograph for this heavily Photoshopped advertisement (as seen here gracing the Crosstown Local) was taken. Well, today dear readers, I am pleased to announce I have the answer!

I spied this chap painting an advertisement for this “Spike Lee Collaboration” this afternoon on Bedford Avenue. I struck up a conversation with him. I knew exactly how to break the ice.

Excuse me, but are you going to paint in the street numbers for these two houses?

I inquired.

I don’t know. The type is awfully small.

He replied, while looking at the print out he was working from.

Well, the one on the left is “400” and the one on the right is “387”.

I helpfully offered.

Did you work on this campaign?

He asked.

“No I didn’t”, I replied and went on to opine:

This discrepancy was brought to my attention while waiting for the G train. Someone circled the addresses and wrote “WHAT”¬† in all caps. When one has to wait 15-20 minutes on a subway platform he (or she) tends to notice such things. In any case you might want to fix that. May I suggest you make the building on the right “398”?

My new friend found this tremendously entertaining and went on the spill the beans about the provenance/fabrication of this image:

  1. The block in question is located in Crown Heights.
  2. The buildings (some of them anyway, including “387”) were originally three stories in height. They were shaved down to two so more sky would be visible.
  3. All the trees were added via Photoshop.

So there have you.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: Absolutly Zero Proof(read)

Today as I was shutter-bugging during Forgotten New York’s tour of Bushwick a gentleman apologized to me for walking in front of my lens.

I wouldn’t want to interfere with Miss Heather taking pictures.

He said. After getting over the initial shock of being “recognized” I replied:

Don’t apologize at all. I’m patient. I can wait.

I mention this anecdote because I have been patiently waiting for my fellow Garden Spotters to tender their two cents on one of the many Absolut Brooklyn subway posters gracing the Crosstown Local.

Today my waiting came to an end. And, quite frankly, I was impressed. Given the high esteem and expectations I have of my fellow Greenpointers this is noteworthy.

What first caught my eye was the giant penis inscribed upon the above gent with chiseled pecs walking his bull dog. That, in turn, drew my attention to this.

Follows are the street numbers for the above depicted (and to reiterate: adjacent) row houses.

400

387

I have on occasion seen street numbers “jump” but I have never to my recollection seen odd and even numbered houses on the same side of the street. Although I had my suspicions I decided to consult the expert; after the Forgotten-NY tour of Bushwick (and dinner) I took Kevin Walsh on a tour of the Queens-bound platform of the Crosstown Local at Metropolitan Avenue. I pointed out to him my eagle-eyed (and anonymous) neighbor’s discovery. Kevin concurred: odd and even-numbered houses are not adjacent to each other.

So there have you. It would appear that this idyllic block only exists in the world of Photoshop, not reality. (As if the attractive, young people gracing this advertisement were not sufficient evidence. People sit on stoops and walk their dogs in Greenpoint. Some gents here, in fact, have moobs— but they are not the result of hitting the gym.). One would think Absolut Brooklyn, which not only had the money to thoroughly inundate¬† our subway system with these advertisements, sponsor Brooklyn Blogfest V and give out swag in return for blog posts would hire an ad agency that would notice this kind of thing. I guess not. Maybe next time they should hire this anonymous Greenpointer— or Kevin— as a consultant?

Miss Heather

Quicklink: Shillfest? Absolutly!

June 8, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11205, Bed-Stuy, Bed-Stuy Brooklyn, Brooklyn, Clinton Hill 

This item comes courtesy of Atlantic Yards Report. Speaking as someone who has:

1. received the press release about Absolut’s generous donation of $50,000 to Habitat For Humanity (which is chump change, I can assure you) and 2. lives in a community which rates among the city’s highest for alcoholism I found their critique of this company’s cynical exploitation of the sad state of affordable housing in north Brooklyn— and the Brooklyn blogosphere in general— rather compelling. You can read AYR’s tome by clicking here.

Miss Heather

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