Urban Artifact: Wish Fulfillment!

CBS screencapSo over the last week we have had:

1. Time Warner employee sex at the Newtown Creek Nature Walk.*

2. Some blue chip public urination at Graham Avenue’s B43 bus stop thrown in for good measure

3. Indecent exposure (as seen at left) on our very Crosstown Local.

Yes, gentle readers, I’d say things are hoppin’.  So much so I lament not seeing my share of the action. Obviously I have been not at the wrong place at the right time. I shared my disappointment with my public urination tipster. To wit, he/she replied:

Awwww Heather. I just know there’s an exposed penis out there for you too. And I bet when you see it, it’ll be the longest one of all. :)

Today it finally happened— in a manner of speaking. Thankfully it did not involve lewd public acts and I actually had the choice of looking— or not. Read on!

371 Stagg Street nys

Ever had the feeling you’re being watched? Today while strolling along Stagg Street I did.

Stagg Street Art Object nys

Sure enough I was right. So help me, but I can swear this fellow was beckoning me to come closer.

Big Head nys

So I did.

Pitching a tent nys

As you can see my new friend is, to use vulgar parlance, “pitching a tent”. Let’s go in!

Little Head nys

What a piece of work is a man! How noble in reason, how infinite in faculty! In form and moving how express and admirable! In action how like an Angel! in apprehension HOW LIKE A GOD!

— William Shakespeare, emphasis mine— Ed. Note.

I can only imagine what the provenance of this item is. A remnant of some hitherto unknown bacchanalian Industrial Business Zone ritual, perhaps?

Heres looking at you kid nys

Here’s looking at you, kid…

Closing on a somewhat related note, your’s truly discovered and acquired a most fascinating product recently. I present without further ado, Peni Fresh!

The FRESHMAKER nys

soapActually I acquired a few bars— much to the amusement of the staff at said deli/grocery. One was a birthday present (said birthday boy was present), the others will be stocking stuffers. The holiday season will be upon us soon enough and let’s face facts: nothing says “Good will toward your fellow man” quite like telling them, however subtly, that they need to wash their tackle. I have yet to discern exactly what is meant by “TUTTI-FRUITTI” flavor. Methinks I’ll leave that task to Ralphie. Those of you who want to upgrade your mere dingus to a dicksicle, methinks I have found the product to make it happen. Cheers!

Peni Fresh: the Freshmaker!

*surveillance footage of which was requested by and is apparently making the rounds through the Newtown Creek Monitoring Committee!

The Word On The Street: Point/Counterpoint

Thames Street

thames

George Street

OK

Stagg Street

nofuture

St Mark’s Place

stmarks

 

 

East Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: Urban Jungle

January 28, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11206, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Street Art 

staggstreet

From Stagg Street.

New York Shitty Day Starter: Stagg Street

October 26, 2012 ·
Filed under: 11206, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Street Art 

Taken October 25, 2012.

New York Shitty Day Starter: From East Williamsburg With Love

Stagg Street

White Street

Evergreen Place

(All photos taken September 6, 2012)

The Word On The Street, Part III: Stagg Street

Taken September 6, 2012.

East Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: Smile!

August 4, 2012 ·
Filed under: 11206, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn 

From Stagg Street.

East Williamsburg Photos Du Jour: Stagg Street

Taken July 25, 2012.

The Word On The Street, Part II: Stagg Street Trifecta

Taken June 27, 2012.

New York Shitty Street Seating du Jour: Special Occupy Stagg Street Edition

February 13, 2012 ·
Filed under: 11206, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Street Furniture 

Taken February 13, 2012.

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