Zen and the Art of Buzzer Maintenance: Greenpoint Style

August 17, 2007 ·
Filed under: Area 51, Greenpoint Magic 

Today’s moment of Zen comes to you courtesy of Mary Meyer from apartment “G24”.

Mary Meyer

Not only is this buzzer system more attractive than the one which (dis)graces my building, it probably works better too.

Miss Heather

Yard Gallery

August 17, 2007 ·
Filed under: Area 51 

Yard Gallery Sign

I came across the above sign on Java Street when I was checking on the progress of the latest Belvedere to grace our neighborhood this week. A flyer posted nearby provides more details.

Yard Gallery Flyer

Looks interesting. Given the sheer number of artists who live in north Greenpoint (myself included), a gallery/art space is long, LONG overdue.

Miss Heather

Touched by an Anal (Probe)

August 17, 2007 ·
Filed under: Crazy People, Greenpoint Magic 

New York City is a strange place. Contrary to what most Manhattanites will tell you, Greenpoint is part of New York City. What’s more, Greenpoint is a stranger part of New York City than most.

Yesterday evening I needed to the grocery store. It was 7:00 p.m. On Manhattan Avenue I heard shouting. I turned to my husband and said:

I bet it’s that guy who was shouting about Rene’s husband screwing his wife last Saturday night. He’s been pretty active lately.

It wasn’t. It was this guy.

Man in Black

As this guy crossed Huron Street, even Vito (a gent who happens to be mentally retarded) picked up on the strange mojo he was giving off. He grabbed his (presumably non-retarded) companion, pointed at this chap and uttered “vato loco”.

That’s when the man in black started shouting again:

HARRY POTTER, F.B.I., INCOMPETENT CUNT!!!

Immediately thereafter he ducked into the subway entrance for the Queens-bound G train. Everyone just stood there. I turned to the man behind me, gave him my best “what the fuck” face and said:

Hey, at least he got on the G train to Queens, he’s their problem now.

To wit he replied:

Yup, that Citibank tower is coming down.

“Maybe he’ll take out some of those awful high rise towers while he’s at it.” I opined and then continued my trek to the grocery store. When I entered The Garden “Metal Health” was playing by Quiet Riot. It was a fitting denouement to a very strange situation.

Miss Heather

A Humble Request From The Owner of 141 Green Street

August 16, 2007 ·
Filed under: Crazy People, Greenpoint Magic 

As I was wandering down to the Franklin Corner Store to get a beverage this afternoon I noticed a new sign had been posted at 141 Green Street.

141 Green Street

Intrigued, I went in for a closer look. Boy am I glad I did!

Please…

This has got to be one of the finest examples of Greenpoint signage I have ever beheld. Seriously. I am fucking speechless.

Miss Heather

A couple more things to do this weekend!

August 16, 2007 ·
Filed under: Area 51 

Last night my pal over at Brooklyn11211 brought two walking tours of Greenpoint and Williamsburg to my attention. Per the Waterfront Preseravtion Alliance web site:

This weekend, WPA members Ward Dennis and Mary Habstritt will be leading a walking tour of Williamsburg & Greenpoint’s Industrial Heritage for the Roebling Chapter of the Society for Industrial Archaeology. And, as these things happen, the Francis Morrone is also leading a tour of Williamsburg & Greenpoint for the Municipal Art Society immediately afterwards. So this Sunday you can double your Williamsburg & Greenpoint historic pleasure!

Williamsburg & Greenpoint’s Industrial Heritage Walking Tour
Sunday, August 19, 1:00 – 4:00 pm.
This neighborhood’s industrial and social history, as well as recent efforts to preserve its historic buildings, will be explored on this tour led by Mary Habstritt, Preservation Committee Chair, and Ward Dennis, historian and member of the Waterfront Preservation Alliance of Greenpoint & Williamsburg. Sites along the way will include the Williamsburg Bridge, Domino Sugar, the Austin, Nichols & Co. Warehouse, remnants of American Manufacturing Co., once the world’s largest rope factory (aka Greenpoint Terminal Market), and Eberhard Faber’s pencil plant.

Meet at the HSBC/Williamsburg Savings Bank, at 175 Broadway (corner of Driggs). Take the J,M,Z subway to Marcy Av. and walk west (toward the East River) on Broadway to the bank.

Greenpoint and Williamsburg — Endangered Waterfront Tour
Date: Sunday, August 19
Time: 4:30 PM
Location: Meet at Manhattan and Greenpoint avenues, by the Greenpoint Ave. station of the G train, Brooklyn
Reservations: Not required
Tour fee: $15, $12 MAS members
For more information: http://www.mas.org, 212-935-2075

These once-bustling working waterfronts lost most of their shipping and manufacturing after World War II, and now even the ghostly remnants of days gone by are being swept aside by a ferocious tide of gentrification, rezoning, and rebuilding as developers reshape these historic waterfronts into enclaves of posh housing. This tour, sponsored by the Municipal Art Society, will look at the current and future redevelopment, and search for the bits left over from the past–some deserving of landmark status. Leader: Francis Morrone, architectural historian.

This is an excellent opportunity to learn more about the historic richness of the north Brooklyn waterfront and why it should be protected. On that note, I would be remiss if I didn’t point out an EXCELLENT piece of writing by Norman Oder (of the Atlantic Yards Report) regarding the recent Domino Sugar Factory shenanigans. Please take the time to read it. It is time well spent.

Miss Heather

This is scary folks!

August 16, 2007 ·
Filed under: Crazy People, Greenpoint Magic 

Yesterday I was knocking around Franklin Street when I found a page from Monday’s edition of the New York Post lying on the sidewalk. It was an article about David Gest. I stopped and read it. I have been having night terrors and fits of bed-wetting ever since.

Billy Mays?

Aside from looking like a demented knock-off of Billy Mays (the Oxi Clean guy) Mr. Gest made known his love for Amy Winehouse. He went on the record and stated:

I’d like to lick the inside of her hair.

Jesus

H.

CHRIST!

Miss Heather

Box Lunch on Bedford Avenue

August 15, 2007 ·
Filed under: Crazy People, Williamsburg 

Lest the promise of a hot dog and a hand job are not sufficient enticements to motivate you Manhattanites to cross the East River, today I present to you the Bedford Avenue Bagel!

Bedford Avenue Bagel with LOX

I came across this delectable and delicious item at the intersection North 3rd Street and (DUH) Bedford Avenue. Initially I thought this baked good was cradled in a B-cup. Upon further inspection I deduced it wasn’t. Silly me.

Gusset

Bagel, lox and fanny floss: it’s what’s for lunch.

A box lunch, that is.

Miss Heather

2007 Coney Island Rockabilly Festival

August 15, 2007 ·
Filed under: Area 51 

I recently received an email regarding this event. My Internet access has been more than a little wonky the last five weeks. But it seems to be working at the moment, so I can finally pass the deets along to you, dear readers. Here is a condensed (and heavily copy-edited) version of their press release:

Come One!! Come All!!

August 16, 2007

The ever-intoxicating Nell and Cockabilly Records presents The Holy Roller Sideshow & Burlesque Revue!!! Rockabilly!! Surf!! Burlesque!! Sideshow!!
9:00 p.m. – 2:00 a.m.: Otto’s Shrunken Head NYC!! Free!!

August 17, 2007
6:00 p.m. – 4:00 a.m.: Cha Cha’s On The Boardwalk’s Big Burlesque Blow Out featuring Burlesque performers from all over the United States, North America and Europe!!!
Over 50 acts!!! Live Surf and Rockabilly With The Holy Roller Sideshow!!!
Main Stage, Cages, Poles, Side Stage With Sideshow And A Brooklyn Rooftop All On The Boardwalk By The Sea And Under The Stars!!! Don’t Miss It!!!

August 18, 2007
The 2007 Coney Island Rockabilly Festival !!!!
Sasquatch and the Sickabillys!! Fury 3!! Tombstone Brawlers!! Jason James and The Bay State House Rockers!! Susquehanna Industrial Tool & Die Co.!! Fisherman Orchestra!! Sean Kershaw and The New Jack Ramblers!!
Outside on the Boardwalk 12:00 p.m. – 8:00 p.m.!!! Free!!!

9:00 p.m.-4:00 a.m.: The 2007 Coney Island Rockabilly Festival After Party and Roller Derby Rumble!!! The Holy Roller Sideshow featuring El Jefe vs. Demons!!
Sideshow and Burlesque!!! And Chicks Beating The Crap Out Of Each Other For Fun!!! (!— Ed. Note) $5.00

August 19, 2007
12:00 p.m. – 2:00 a.m.:
The 2007 Miss Pin Up Coney Island Contest!!! $500 cash prize for the winner!!! Instant Fame and International Notoriety !!!! Come see who Cha Cha will crown Miss Pin Up Coney Island!!! $5.00

For more details check out their MySpace page or shoot them an email at: coneyislandrockabillyfestival (at) hotmail (dot) com.

Miss Heather

Happenings on Franklin Street

August 15, 2007 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Here is a smattering of what’s shaking on Franklin Street. There’s a little something for everybody. Even freaks like me, as you will see.

Fetty Invite

Tomorrow, August 16, from 7:00 – 10:00 p.m. Alter will be having a sample sale of jewelry made by Greenpointer (born and raised!) Fetty of Brooklyn.

Fetty Jewelry

Per Tommy, the co-proprietor of Alter, “…amazing prices (from $20-$100) and fierce selection of brass, sterling silver and even some gold jewelry” are in the offering. I have checked out Fetty’s web site and I gotta tell you that he (or she) has a pretty wicked sense of humor. “Lizzie’s Love”, a necklace graced with an ax and a heart with a significant piece of it missing, is particularly piquant.

Stop in after work and check it out. I have been told champagne will be served. (!)

ALTER
109 Franklin St.
Brooklyn, NY 11222
(718) 784-8818
www.alterbrooklyn.com

August 17 (a Friday) through Sunday, August 19 Dalaga NYC will be having their end of summer sale. An extra 10% off will be taken off all sale items. If you happen to be on their mailing list (as I am) you get an extra 10% off on top of that!

Their newest shipment of merchandise includes:

  • Higher rise jeans in every fit. Starting at $68! (Thank GOD! No more whale tail! —Ed. Note)
  • New Perfectly Plaid & Leather Tote bags by PINK
  • Glamourous fall wrap dresses
  • Lovely Long & Lean Sweater Sets by Beau Bois

Dalaga NYC
150 Franklin St.
Brooklyn, NY 11222
(877) 287 8395
info@Dalaganyc.com

Starting this September Word Books will be hosting a book club. For more details, swing by their shop, give them a call or shoot them an email at…

Word Books
146 Franklin Street
Brooklyn, NY 11222
info@wordbrooklyn.com
(718) 383-0096

Lastly…

Night of the Living Zedd

Yeah, this is a ways off but let me tell you something: Rev Jen has been a major influence on yours truly. In fact, if it wasn’t for reading her pithy tomes (my favorite being an essay about Budweiser) New York Shitty probably would not exist. Seriously.

This sex symbol for the insane is not only the proprietress of The Lower East Side Troll Museum, but is also responsible for the fine cinematic masterpiece Lord of the Cockrings (about which she later noted she was not only the film’s director, but also its fluffer!), elfpanties.com (no longer extant) and Doo-Doo the fifth Teletubbie. I can’t wait to see what she and Nick Zedd have cooked up. Per their web site, East Coast Aliens says this will be the first of a monthly series of his films!

NIGHT OF THE LIVING ZEDD
East Coast Aliens

216 Franklin Street
Brooklyn, NY 11222
www.eastcoastaliens.com

Be there or be square!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint is for Lovers

August 14, 2007 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Long Island City 

Greenpoint is for Lovers

A week ago I strolled down to the northern terminus of Manhattan Avenue to see how the new park is coming along.

Manhattan Avenue Park Facing East

Although you cannot tell from this photo, it looks pretty close to completion. I am really jazzed about this park. I can hardly wait to hang out there and check out the scenic views of Manhattan, Newtown Creek and lest we forget…

Manhattan Avenue Park

I have often cast my gaze across the fragrant thoroughfare that is Newtown Creek and asked myself:

I wonder what those Long Island City slickers think of us humble Greenpointers?

Well today I got my answer courtesy of Licnyc.com’s Online Forum. They think we’re HOT!

“BrandonZ” raves:

If I can just be completely frank… Seriously, I walk over the Pulaski and there are attractive, stylish young women everywhere. I mean, everywhere. It kills me.

Hardly ever on this side of the Creek. What gives? I suppose there’s hardly anyone in general on this side of the Creek, comparatively, so maybe there’s my answer.

The price I pay to be contrarian (and have more transit access) and live in Queens…

Aw shucks Brandon, you just made me blush! I’ll be sure to blow kisses at you as I’m pick-a-nicking and swilling Cabernet at my new park.

Toodles!

Miss Heather

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