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Culture on the Cheap
My Trip Up Shit Creek: Part Deux
Filed under: Asshole, Dung of the Day, Greenpoint Magic, Long Island City, Other Shit, Queens, Williamsburg
I learned a funny thing yesterday. A “friend” will invite you on a boat ride of Newtown Creek. He will later even laud the photographs and the footage you shot. That is, until some person at Channel 13 (who hired said boat and seems to think all the intellectual/creative property gathered from it is his) raises a stink:
Hey Heather,
I’m glad you enjoyed the trip on Newtown Creek the other day. I’m not sure if we officially met but I know you talked to my associate Daniel. I’m writing because I was checking out your blog and I noticed you’d posted several videos of the trip. I don’t mean to be any sort of stickler but it makes me a little uncomfortable to have other people reporting on the same thing which I hired a boat to capture. I don’t have any problem with you posting photos or stories about the trip but the video just happens to be exactly why we were there and sort of crosses lines of exclusivity. So, let me profusely apologize for having to ask but I would really appreciate it if you would take the videos down.
So, my other question would be how you knew about the trip. I didn’t have any problem with people coming out with us as long as they were out of the way but no one told me we should be expecting guests so I don’t really know how that came about.
Anyway, sorry again. If you’d like to chat about it, feel free to give me a call or email back.
Thanks much,
-t
I’m not a chatty kind of gal. Just ask my parents. I rarely answer the phone, much less pick it up and call some condescending chap who wants to “chat” about why my seven minutes of film footage does not undermine his “vision”.
Dear old dad taught me a few things about anger management, albeit accidentally. One of them was I can channel anger in a constructive manner whose effect, in turn, is actually quite the opposite: destructive. Call what I am about to do passive/aggressive or one of life’s little ethical loopholes and/or gray areas. Call it whatever you want. Sure, I yanked the “video” showcasing said “exclusive material” —and I replaced it with another one. This. Now I am bringing back the original.
Pa Heather, this one goes out to you. You know better than anyone that no one can make me shut up.
Miss Heather
P.S.: I’m not taking this one down. If the peeps at Channel 13 have some special interest in publicly humiliating my husband (or training him to recycle correctly) I want a piece of the action. Simple as that.
Urban Artifact: Manhattan Avenue
I strongly suspect this will become a regular feature on New York Shitty. “This” being my predilection for picking up weird crap off the street and taking it home. That said, here’s urban artifact #1:
Someone is going to live.
With a little help from 100 disposable vinyl gloves.
Miss Heather
Furman Island Isn’t What It Used To Be
One thing a lot of people do not seem to know is Newtown Creek once had a number of islands. What you are seeing in the above photograph is the vestige of one of them: Furman Island. It is now a part of Queens, but if one looks through the online archives of the Brooklyn Daily Eagle (as I have) one will quickly discern it was a vibrant part of this largely industrial (and very aromatic) waterway.
Did you know that Furman Island even helped to prevent a malaria outbreak?!? I didn’t until I read an article from the August 2, 1894 edition of the Brooklyn Daily Eagle entitled Calls It Cologne Gulch: Vivid Portrayal Of The Evils Along Newtown Creek. In this piece an intrepid reporter from none other than Harper’s Weekly goes to Newtown Creek to get the scoop on the poop from a local. Here is an excerpt:
Those of you who have the time really should read this lengthy (4000+ words) article in its entirety. My favorite part is about the “egg factory”. What was the egg factory, you ask? Click here and read for yourself! Be advised you may not want to do so over lunch…
Crosstown Local Photo du Jour: Death By Cell Phone
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
From the Queens-bound platform of the G at Greenpoint Avenue.
Miss Heather
My Trip Up Shit Creek
I was invited at the last minute to tag along on a boat trip along Greenpoint’s very own Riviera: none other than Newtown Creek! Channel 13 needed to shoot some footage of it yesterday for some online project/pilot they are working on. I was advised to keep quiet —and for the most part I did —except when my enthusiasm got the better of me. As you will see in this little film/slide show I made for your entertainment. Enjoy!
Between the Mister and I we took approximately 500 photographs. You can look forward to seeing highlights of our stygian journey up shit creek on Flickr** in a day or two. Now if you don’t mind, I have a mild sunburn to salve. Ouch!
Miss Hater Heather***
*August 19, 2008: I have been asked by the “friend” who invited me on this boat ride and some imperial wizard from Channel 13 (online) to remove my video from You Tube. The latter writes:
…it makes me a little uncomfortable to have other people reporting on the same thing which I hired a boat to capture. I don’t have any problem with you posting photos or stories about the trip but the video just happens to be exactly why we were there and sort of crosses lines of exclusivity.
I never knew Newtown Creek was so exclusive. I just thought it stank like hell. And got a lot of publicity of late because Senator Clinton jumped on the Superfund bandwagon. But what would I know? I’ve only lived here for eight years and get giddy when I see used condoms floating on Greenpoint’s Gold Coast!
Here’s a revised version of my movie:
**You can see photographs from my trip by clicking here.
***It would appear that I have made a friend (or two) in Jackson Heights. For the record, I really liked this neighborhood and plan to go back there more often. I happen to be a BIG fan of Mohammed Rafi and Bollywood music in general; I cannot wait to haunt their music shops! Sure “Jack Heights” doesn’t have Coney Island White Fish, but I am willing to overlook that. I see plenty of those here at home. 😉
Greenpoint Photo du Jour: Nessie
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Lest the chartreuse water is not a dead giveaway, this photograph was taken on Newtown Creek. While many of you were lounging in the park, eating brunch, nursing a hangover or doing whatever people do in north Brooklyn on a Sunday morning I was on a boat cruising Greenpoint’s most (in)famous waterway. And as always it did not disappoint. You can look forward to reading more about my journey (including film footage) later today!
Miss Heather
Greenpoint Fashion Watch
Filed under: 11222, Advanced Life Forms, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic
The last twenty four hours my inbox has been abuzz with fashion. More specifically the stylings of a certain physician whose office is on Greenpoint Avenue between Manhattan Avenue and Franklin Street.
Bitchcakes writes:
Walking up Greenpoint Ave yesterday (from Franklin going towards Manhattan Ave), Matt and I noticed this advertisement in a window (attached). It was just screaming your name, so I had to make sure you saw it.
Mike writes:
My name is Mike, I’m one of the writers of the NAG blog– thanks for the bloggy love- we got a lot of hits from you.
This isn’t NAG blog material, but totally up your alley…
The attached picture is of a poster is in one of the newly-renovated buildings on the south side of Greenpoint Ave b/t Manhattan and Franklin. Everything about it says “please don’t let this man touch your privates, even in a medical context.”
What is all the Garden Spot fuss about, you ask?
This guy.
Nice bow tie.
Miss Heather
TODAY: Boids. Dirty Stinking Boids.
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Today at Word Books Courtney Humphries, the author of Superdove: How Pigeons Took Manhattan…and the World will give a presentation and talk about how:
…the lowly rock dove became the pigeon, a bird ubiquitous and annoying enough to be reviled as a rat with wings, but one that has also inspired rapturous artistry and fetishistic devotion from breeders, eaters and racers, and has managed to thrive just about anywhere humans have trod.
I’ve had one of these buggers shit on my head once. In the middle of summer. It is not an experience I will soon forget. Nonetheless a great number of people fancy New York Shitty’s bird of infamy (Franz Liebkind included), for those of you out there (and you know who you are) who love pigeons or wish to learn more about them here are the deets.
What: Courtney Humphries talks about pigeons
Where: Word Books
126 Franklin Street
Brooklyn, New York 11222
When: August 17, 2008; 2:00 p.m.
Why: Because pigeons are interesting, if disgusting.
How: The Greenpoint Avenue stop of the G or the B61, B43 or B24 bus.
My advice: wear a hat.
Miss Heather
More Fun At The Nature Walk
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic
Laura Hofmann writes:
Mike & I went back to the DEP Nature Walk today to check on the oil situation. Only at the DEP Nature Walk steps can you find treasures like this! I’m trying to figure out where he came from since we did find dead crabs (including a horseshoe crab) there last week. He’s got some markings on him. Makes me think that he’s a decoy that may have been used to track waterfowl … perhaps pesticides? Poor guy, didn’t make it through the experiment I guess!
Now there’s a piece of home decor you won’t find at Ikea!
Miss Heather
TOMORROW: Burlesque At The L.E.S.
Tomorrow a fellow Greenpointer, Dizzy Swank, will be having a birthday burlesque blow-out at the Slipper Room. Tickets cost only $5.00! So if you happen to be knocking around the Lower East Side tomorrow why not swing by, check it out and wish a neighbor a happy birthday? You’ll have a lot of fun!
Burlesque Birthday Show
167 Orchard Street
New York, New York 10002
Miss Heather
NYS Flickr Pool
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