New & Noteworthy: Neither More Nor Less

May 7, 2009 ·
Filed under: Manhattan 

nmnlbobarihood

What I love about this blog (which hails from the East Village) is encapsulated by the above photograph. Before you, dear readers, get your self-righteous feathers in a ruffle you best look at the entire post. This site isn’t about vilifying or making fun of the homeless.

nmnlbobarihood2

Neither Nor More Less showcases the disparity between the “New York City” run by and for the affluent and, well, the less photogenic people who actually live here. In the above example we see a well-to-do couple laughing while seemingly oblivious to a man pissing himself. The previous scenario is not dissimilar to what I see in Greenpoint or Williamsburg on any given day. What is transpiring in the East Village will and is happening in Greenpoint. Not that most of the people reading this will be around to see it. We’ll be “priced out”.

38-india-street

My question is how long can we afford to ignore them? Whether our (se)lected officials care to admit it the growing homeless population in our city deserves our attention and compassion. True civilization in my book is how we, as a people, care for those who cannot fend themselves. Be they two or four legged. In this regard our city has failed. Miserably.

Miss Heather

More People In My Neighborhood: Springtime Edition

May 7, 2009 ·
Filed under: Advanced Life Forms, Greenpoint Magic 

Now that the family has come and gone I am left with the daunting task of sorting all the photographs I have taken over the last week. Follows are a few select shots of my fellow Greenpointers. Enjoy!

grannyongreenpoint

A Greenpoint Avenue grandma for lunch.

herion

Nodding off in front of Mickey D’s.

gg

Waiting for the bus with a smile and a song!

roverbarrellove

Love, Kent Street style.

naptimeatjava

Nap time at Java Car Service.

tommystavern

Picking a winner at Tommy’s Tavern.

dupontstlove

Grabbing a handful at Dupont Street.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: CONFIRMED!

May 6, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

37commercialst

Remember the post I wrote this weekend about 37 Commercial Street possibly being the site of a film shoot? This afternoon I received another inquiry about it from a reader we’ll call Christo (who took the above photograph). He writes:

Water feed. Building site? Movie set?

Most decidedly the latter! On a lark (and wishing to put the speculation to rest once and for all) I popped over to the Department of Buildings web site. Here’s what I found.

37-commercial-st-permit

Yes folks it would appear the rumors are in fact true. HBO will filming what I would presume to be the upcoming miniseries Boardwalk Empire right here in Greenpoint. What’s more they will be building a boardwalk. Perhaps we should entrust these folks with building the manifold number of other “waterfront spaces” we have been promised? I’d wager they’ll get ’em knocked out faster than our city will!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: What Is Wrong With This Picture?

May 6, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

During his stay at Chez Shitty my father got to witness firsthand the hilarity that is life in Greenpoint. Upon arriving he beheld the barricaded glory that is 110 Green Street and, appropriately enough, shortly before he departed we got a few chuckles courtesy of the following.

greenst1

What is wrong with this picture? If you guessed the giant nondo to the left you are only half correct. If you look a little more closely you’ll notice…

greenst2

this traffic sign. Note the direction the of the cars parked on this block. Now note the orientation of this sign. Now factor in that Green is a one way street and you get the idea.

greenst3

For those of you who are not in the know there is a stop sign located on this block within eyeshot of the above-depicted sign.

greenst4

Unfortunately it is located in the opposite direction. Whoops. It just goes to show there is no job, however small, this city cannot manage to bungle. Given that our municipal guardians had a 50/50 chance of getting it right this is no small feat. Way to go guys.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: The Horror Of 200 Franklin Street

May 6, 2009 ·
Filed under: Abjectecture, Greenpoint Magic 

Many of you who have read this blog over the years are all too familiar with my fixation on an architect named Karl Fischer. There reasons for this are manifold but they all essentially boil down to the fact he is responsible for some of the more hideous (and enormous) structures that now pollute north Brooklyn’s landscape. Enough so that my good friend Bob Guskind named a strip of Bayard Street (which features a number of his “creations”) Karl Fischer Row.

Unfortunately what some seem to have overlooked is Mr. Fischer has also left an indelible imprint upon Williamsburg’s less famous sister: Greenpoint. 305 McGuinness Boulevard and 130 Diamond Street are two of the better known pieces of Karl’s handiwork to be found here. And then of course you have 200 Franklin Street.

198 Franklin Street Shitty

When completed this— one of the most woeful examples of modification permit abuse and one of the ugliest things mankind has ever concocted— will be what the residents of the Astral, a landmark building, will have to look at every day. Lest I have not made myself perfectly clear already: I loathe this building. And this morning as I perused my inbox I learned I am not alone.

200-frkln-demise-web

What’s more he (or she) decided to make his/her feelings known to this building’s creators.

Odin writes:

Dear Miss Heather,

I thought I would share something of my own pursuits as it is particularly relevant to the Franklin St. development discussion. Attached are images of a poster I made in response to the building going up at 200 Franklin St. It is disheartening that something even more gargantuan could be erected at 60 Commercial St which is now such a tranquil post industrial setting.

The screen printed posters were not received well and were quickly painted over. Not as many people saw them as I had hoped, but I may do a second run.

Your fellow neighbor

Follows is what the folks at 200 Franklin Street did not want you to see.

200 Franklin

It came… a lurking twelve story behemoth that sought to devour the surrounding skyline. Can any force keep this monstrous edifice from casting its shadowy pall over the neighborhood or will this building become another…

ARCHITECTURAL DISASTER!!!

Excellent question, Odin. You can read more about how this poster came into being by clicking here.

Miss Heather

This Is Why I Like Teenagers

May 6, 2009 ·
Filed under: Crosstown Local, Greenpoint Magic 

(Or, The G Train Strikes Back)

This morning my parents made their return to the Land of Enchantment. Our week long vacation seeing the sights of this fair city  (the fun stuff, not the offal shilled in travel brochures) was pretty uneventful. That is until we decided to go to Manducatis last night for dinner. Or more accurately when we decided to come home via (you guessed it) the G train. For a Tuesday evening the train was curiously crowded. Mostly with teenagers in a very lively mood. I chose to sit next to them. My parents— not being acclimatized to such shenanigans (as are most retirees)— kept their distance. In hindsight this was an excellent decision on their part, as you will learn.

After we got off at Greenpoint Avenue we dropped by the local wine store and headed home. It was as I was headed up the stairs of our apartment building that the Mister spied something nested in the hood of my jacket. Upon closer inspection he told me what it was. Follows is my reply:

You’re kidding, right?

No. He wasn’t.

condom

After we established that the prophylactic in question was indeed unused I ceased to care. My mother (who can be seen recoiling in horror in the background of the above photograph which was taken by Mister Heather*) felt differently. Now that I have had time to think about it, it isn’t so much the fact that someone saw fit to use me as some kind of walking advertisement for safe sex that troubles me. I’ve had lit cigarettes flung at my person with amazing accuracy. And worse. Public humiliation no longer fazes me. Rather, it’s the fact that I walked 2-3 city blocks with this hilarious item in tow and no one seemed to notice. Or care.

In closing I’d like to give a heaping helping of New York Shitty gratitude to those mischievous youths on the Smith – 9th bound G train. You gave my parents the quintessential Crosstown Local experience. Thanks guys!

Miss Heather

*Who then proceeded to tell my parents:

She comes home with condoms stuck to her all the time.

Crosstown Local Photos Du Jour: What A Piece Of Work Is The Crosstown Local

May 5, 2009 ·
Filed under: Crazy People, Crosstown Local, Greenpoint Magic 

Nassau Avenue

shakespeareonnassau

O Wonder!

How many goodly creatures are there here!
How beauteous mankind is! O Brave new world
That has such people in it!

Greenpoint Avenue

bedbugsareback

What piece of work is a man the G train! how noble in reason! how infinite in faculty! in form and moving how express and admirable! in action how like an angel! In apprehension how like a god! the beauty of the world! the paragon of animals! And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust? man delights not me: no, nor woman neither, though by your smiling you seem to say so. — William Shakespeare, Hamlet, Act II, Scene II

Miss Heather

East Village Photo Du Jour: Shit Happens East 8 Street

May 5, 2009 ·
Filed under: Manhattan 

shitiscoming

Judging from what I see in this here picture I’d say (sh)it has already arrived.

Miss Heather

Williamspoint Photos Du Jour: A Splash Of Color

May 4, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

Today the “Heather Clan” made the obligatory trip to Chinatown and the East Village. Not only did I have a great time (Miss Heather loves her some Chinatown!), but I took a number of photographs which I will share with you soon. In the meantime here is a pair of absolutely stunning images from a little closer to home courtesy of mugsniffer. Enjoy!

blendmugsniffer

South 2nd Street, 11211

sidingmugsniffer

Russell Street, 11222

Miss Heather

Chinatown Photo Du Jour: Pest Control

May 4, 2009 ·
Filed under: Manhattan 

warning

From East Broadway.

Miss Heather

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