Something I Really Didn’t Need To Know

Anyone who is married will tell you the institution is all about sharing. Sharing a home, sharing a life, sharing the stomach flu, and so forth. This mutually agreed upon bond also entails learning things about one’s partner you may very well prefer not to know. Case in point:

Miss Heather: She is a really beautiful woman. This is really saying something given she is green.
Mr. Heather: Green women can be sexy. Haven’t you ever seen that Star Trek episode?
(Miss Heather swivels around in her office chair, stares at Mr. Heather)
Miss Heather: You should be SO happy Overheard in New York won’t accept submissions from conversations you are involved in.

Yes, my husband is a colossal dork. MY DORK until death do us part. Lucky me.

Miss Heather

Crosstown Local Photo du Jour: Pug & Fug

I cannot honestly say I am a big fan of Tori Spelling (although to be fair she was good in House of Yes). Had it not been for her famous (and now, deceased) father she would not blight our television screens once a week. Everyone knows this— and in all probability she does too. The previous having been said even I have to admit this is a bit harsh.

Ouch.

Miss Heather

Mildly Disturbing Image Of The Day: Intervention

I’m not terribly sure what led up to what you see in the above photograph and I sure as hell didn’t make it my business by asking. If I had to hazard a guess I’d say this is Larry da Junkman’s way of administering some tough love. In any case, this is not the first time I have seen a man bound, gagged and taped to a chair in Greenpoint —and I seriously doubt it will be the last.

Miss Heather

P.S.: No one was hurt or harmed in any way during the taking of this photograph. After being debriefed the above captive was released no worse for wear. In fact, he thanked Larry. The Thing is a junk shop, not Guantanamo Bay. Simple tomfoolery, nothing more. If it wasn’t I would have done something —like call the police.

Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh My!

From Franklin Street.

From Manhattan Avenue.

And lastly, this fearsome bear hails from Kent Street. The next time Dorothy and her dog Toto decide to go on a concussion-induced journey they should come to Greenpoint. The beasts who roam our urban jungle are quite cute!

Miss Heather

Poetry By Phil

Given that today is the Mermaid Parade (and I have no intention of missing it!) today’s offerings will be exceptionally lite. However, I want to take this opportunity to showcase the work of one of my favorite Greenpointers, none other than the tremendously fabulous Phil! The following piece is entitled Thief. Enjoy!

The dog is at my door.
It won’t be long now.
It always happens when people
talk, when you get careless
close, or desperate or
WEAK. And worst of all
Unafraid when you don’t
See your shadow anymore
that angel that walks
besides you, protects you
Vanishes like mist
your old man, and you got holes
in your pocket where dreams
and wishes slip away into
the gutters you sip wine
on. You’re afraid to blink
and the scars on your body
become medals.

If you see Phil on the street, why not give him a kind word for sharing his deeply personal work with us? If you do, you’ll learn he is a tremendously intelligent and very nice guy!

Miss Heather

REMINDER: Jason & The Argonauts

This is quick reminder before I call it a day that Ray Harryhausen’s amazing film, Jason and the Argonauts, will be screened this evening at the American Playground for your absolutely FREE viewing pleasure. The festivities start at 8:00 p.m. so grab those your lawn chairs, pack your picnic basket and check it out. I have no doubt the trailers will be fantastic!

Miss Heather