From The New York Shitty Inbox: A Bar Cometh To 200 Franklin?

May 11, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

This item comes courtesy of a chap named Charles. He writes:

Saw this on my everyblock – looks like that (Dandelion-owned?) wine bar may come true! But, it certainly looks like it’s at 200 Franklin, under that weird wedding cake douchebox, Not at Van Gogh’s Radio as had been speculated.

Very interesting indeed! While I know that someone (not Lily) has voiced interest in operating an eating and drinking establishment at Van Gogh’s old space (and to this end has taken measures to file an application for a liquor license) I did not know she had something  like this up her sleeve! I will have to ask her about this the next time I see her. In the meantime if anyone has the 411 on “Wyne A But” please leave a comment or shoot me an email at: missheather (at) thatgreenpointblog (dot) com. Thanks!

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: A Bar At 200 Franklin?

March 28, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

M writes:

Hello Miss Heather,

I have a question I was hoping you might be able to help provide some insight on, seeing as you are generally my go to source for Greenpoint related news. I live on the corner of Franklin and Huron and for the past 2 years have learned to ignore the monstrosity being built down the block from me. However, I might have accidentally warmed up to it a little bit, if only because the construction workers were extremely polite and cordial-to the point where I actually looked forward to seeing them in the morning and evening as I went on my commute.  Anyway, I’ve started to notice some activity in the ground floor store fronts and am curious as to what is going in. I didn’t see any signs posted that might provide answers, but in the store front right on the corner of Franklin and India I saw the potential for a coffee shop/restaurant. Mainly some chairs, maybe a fridge, a chalkboard menu with was I think was “English Breakfast” and reasonable prices.  Is there any chance the Greenpoint Coffee House might have found a new home? Or am I just projecting my owns dreams and desires into this store front?

Here’s what I know:

  1. The last day the Greenpoint Coffee House was open there was a liquor license petition for a tavern serving “light fare” to be located this address.
  2. I have heard rumors— and that’s just what they are, rumors— that some folks from the Greenpoint Coffee House are behind this endeavor.

In any case, it certainly appears a bar will be taking this space. The buzz I have heard affirms this.

On a related note, you might be interested to know the Garden Spot Cafe (which will be taking over the Greenpoint Coffee House’s old space and is purported to open this spring) has applied for and been awarded a liquor license. In closing, I’s like to pass along this liquor license application I found while poking around Community Board 1’s web site:

Lest you are wondering where 1110 Manhattan Avenue is located, it is directly across the street from the place formerly known as the Greenpoint Hotel.

Miss Heather

P.S.: Here’s one last piece of tantalizing neighborhood gossip.

It is rumored the people behind 7A are behind the restaurant slated to grace Casa Mon Amour’s old space at 162 Franklin Street.

Quicklink: The Great Greenpoint Ugly-Off!

February 9, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

My buddy Joey over at Curbed was kind enough to bring this fugfest featuring two buildings from none other than the Garden Spot of the Universe to my attention. So which excrescence do YOU think is worse: 200 Franklin Street or 524 Manhattan Avenue? Personally (and I write this as the “tipster” mentioned in the photo credits) I lean towards 200 Franklin. It looks like am ionic air purifier date-raped a butt plug. Or as one commenter, Restless, puts it all too eloquently:

I’d be ashamed to be seen entering either one, but have to give the Eye Damage Award to 524 Manhattan — because it looks like Harry was serious, while we all know Karl scribbles his designs in his sleep, as therapy, hoping to transfer his nightmares to the world at large.

I couldn’t have said it any better myself. Point, click and vote fellow Greenpointers!

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: Last Stop On Franklin

February 8, 2010 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic 

Greenpoint Coffee House: 2003 – 2010

Miss Heather

P.S.: On a related note, does anyone have the 411 about the petition (as seen in the foreground of the above photograph) that  a “tavern” serving light fare should be allowed at 200 Franklin Street (AKA: Karl’s latest piece of krap)? My curiousity is seriously piqued.

New York Shitty Day Starter: Separated At Birth…

or would that be death?

Colleen writes: not to take away from your own adventures in shit condos, thought you’d enjoy this.


Enjoy it I did (although Cheapshit failed to mention vibramassage beds in the above post). I laughed my ass off. Here’s another corker.


Cheapshit writes:

From their website

The Cobrizo @ Lake Union, combines affordability with spectacular views of Lake Union. The buildings trendy industrial exterior flows into the interior where interesting colors, angles and transitions between rooms emulate an active urban lifestyle.

WTF are they talking about?!?

By “emulate an active urban lifestyle” they must mean living directly on one of Seattle’s biggest highways, Aurora. Do not actively run across the highway in front, you will die…

I take issue with this. At least the Cobrizo has nice cement barriers to prevent some hapless idiot from driving into some other hapless idiot’s living room.

another view of the sceneNYS

Last month in Greenpoint, Brooklyn U.S.A. a traffic light and one of Mayor Mike’s 1,000,000 trees “took one for the team”.

Welcome to Huron Street!nys

This little mishap blocked McGuinness Boulevard for hours. I have no idea how the chair factors into this. It has four legs; it could have, should have run. Maybe it did? In any case it does not appear to be very happy.


The “305 Lofts” were planned as condominiums but have since been dumped into rental propertywith a few hilarious bumps along the way. I suspect the proximity to McGuinness Boulevard and being located one block away from the east coast’s largest waste treatment plant might have something to do with this. But I digress. Let’s proceed to the supreme grotesque— the purpose of this post.


In regards to the latter Cheapshit writes:

In these days of Seattle condo market freefall, we don’t build new condos. We almost tear down old buildings that were perfectly livable and leave them undemolished while making web sites about the fancy condo towers that we might build. This near pile of rubble one year later is the site of the “Seneca Towers”. The developer Levin Menzies, living in California, seems to have lost interest in this project. This is also what happens when you let developers run your city.


Same goes in New York Shitty. Who needs history or character when condos beckon?


Different coast, same story.


I am certain when the time comes the “Toch” facade will be lavished the same attention to historic and stylistic detail as this Karl Fischer masterpiece on Richardson Street.


Or this, his latest turd, 200 Franklin Street.

200 franklin

Both of the previous abominations were built by virtue of “modification” permits that are doled out New York City’s very own Department of Buildings regularly. Slapping obnoxious residential towers atop industrial properties is Karl’s forte. He is a one man race to the bottom.

This is what happens when developers run your city.

Miss Heather

Cheapshit, Queens Crap and I should do a bi-coastal critique of condo crap. It could be fun.

A Modest Proposal

May 28, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

flierthumbYesterday my buddy down at Brooklyn11211 wrote (in regards to this post):

Heather found these fliers posted on a telephone pole on Dupont Street. The flyer is right – these zoning changes should have happened three to four years ago. But since there are still a lot of horses in the barn, better than never closing the barn door now.

What my friend down south fails to mention is the reason for this “new” zoning: to redress the abuse and excesses of the now infamous 2005 re-zoning. Had the previous been better thought out, more appreciative of community input and “loop-hole” proof there would be no proverbial “barn door” left open to close. The previous having been written my opinion about the new “down-zone” is as follows:

Too little, too late.

Nonetheless I have little doubt it will be passed. The shoddy economy has done its part to slow— if not halt— the construction of super-sized luxuriana in Greenpoint for the time being. This measure is nothing more than a convenient rubber stamp that attests to what the market has already made all too clear: there are too many “developments” in north Brooklyn no one can (or cares to) afford. What’s more, nowadays the developers can’t afford them either.

  1. 110 Green (AKA: The Viridian) has declared bankruptcy and has been put on the market for— get this— $65,000,000!
  2. The Pencil Lofts recently halted work because the developer, one Baruch Singer of slumlord fame, defaulted on the loan.
  3. And now we have Warehouse 11. Built atop what my good friend Bob Guskind called the “Roebling Oil Field” this super-sized development defaulted on its mortgage and is now in the process of foreclosure.

Call me cynical, but given:

  1. The implications of the new zoning measure and
  2. the substantial number of vacant lots and half-built “nondos” in Greenpoint

I cannot help but ask the question:

What about 200 Franklin Street?


Will it become a nondo or be lanced by rezoning? Only time will tell. Either way it will probably look worse than its designer, Greenpoint’s good friend Karl Fischer, ever imagined. Taking into account that the original design looks something like a cross between an ionic air purifier and a butt plug that’s pretty damned ugly! All I ask— as a humble citizen— is this: if we have to live with an architectural behemoth sorely out of context with its surroundings could it at least be interesting?

Which brings me back community input— and my modest (and admittedly haphazardly Photoshopped) proposal for 200 Franklin Street: cap it and tap it.


To give credit where credit is due Mister Heather got the ball rolling on this one. He suggested a pagoda be placed atop the existing structure at 200 Franklin Street. I told him it was the best idea he ever had. While flattered, the Mister was slightly disturbed at the thought that I thought this was the best idea he ever had. But it is! Just use your imagination.

Instead of retail space and luxury condos— of which Greenpoint has too many already— why not have mixed use hepa filter/Buddhist Monastery? By exploiting the various and sundry petroleum products under our own feet we could fuel an air freshener like no other. Toss in a few monks chanting, some sandalwood burning and Greenpoint will smell good in no time! Not only will we clean our air, but we’ll also cleanse our karma. Fuck 421a, this is the ultimate added value!

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: The Horror Of 200 Franklin Street

May 6, 2009 ·
Filed under: Abjectecture, Greenpoint Magic 

Many of you who have read this blog over the years are all too familiar with my fixation on an architect named Karl Fischer. There reasons for this are manifold but they all essentially boil down to the fact he is responsible for some of the more hideous (and enormous) structures that now pollute north Brooklyn’s landscape. Enough so that my good friend Bob Guskind named a strip of Bayard Street (which features a number of his “creations”) Karl Fischer Row.

Unfortunately what some seem to have overlooked is Mr. Fischer has also left an indelible imprint upon Williamsburg’s less famous sister: Greenpoint. 305 McGuinness Boulevard and 130 Diamond Street are two of the better known pieces of Karl’s handiwork to be found here. And then of course you have 200 Franklin Street.

198 Franklin Street Shitty

When completed this— one of the most woeful examples of modification permit abuse and one of the ugliest things mankind has ever concocted— will be what the residents of the Astral, a landmark building, will have to look at every day. Lest I have not made myself perfectly clear already: I loathe this building. And this morning as I perused my inbox I learned I am not alone.


What’s more he (or she) decided to make his/her feelings known to this building’s creators.

Odin writes:

Dear Miss Heather,

I thought I would share something of my own pursuits as it is particularly relevant to the Franklin St. development discussion. Attached are images of a poster I made in response to the building going up at 200 Franklin St. It is disheartening that something even more gargantuan could be erected at 60 Commercial St which is now such a tranquil post industrial setting.

The screen printed posters were not received well and were quickly painted over. Not as many people saw them as I had hoped, but I may do a second run.

Your fellow neighbor

Follows is what the folks at 200 Franklin Street did not want you to see.

200 Franklin

It came… a lurking twelve story behemoth that sought to devour the surrounding skyline. Can any force keep this monstrous edifice from casting its shadowy pall over the neighborhood or will this building become another…


Excellent question, Odin. You can read more about how this poster came into being by clicking here.

Miss Heather

Spring Has Sprung In North Brooklyn!

Yes folks, you can literally smell it in the air: springtime has finally come to north Brooklyn.


The winteriana has been packed away and replaced with more springtimey fare— such as this deliciously terrifying rabbit from India Street. And not unlike the mighty Monarch butterfly, a number of construction projects have emerged from their respective chrysalises to display their new found glory for all to enjoy.


This humdrum specimen hails from 916 Manhattan Avenue. As you can see it sports some seriously fierce asphalt siding.  No more.  After a couple of modification permits (and a little Greenpoint magic) it has been…



Of course what would any discourse about abjectecture be without a mention of my good friend Karl Fischer?


Holy 311 calls! It would appear the scaffolding has begun to come down at 200 Franklin Street…


and what a magnificent sight it is!


A number of images come to mind when people use words like “craftsmanship” “luxury” or “quality”. This is not one of them.

And last, but hardly least, what would a revue of north Brooklyn abjectecture be without a Belvedere? Good news kids: thanks to the wizards at Belvedere/Bridge Realty North 9 Street Williamsburg can now claim one of their very own!


Or should I make that XXVI?*


Congratulations northside Williamsburg you’ve just joined the club!


Too bad this sign doesn’t apply to architecture.

Miss Heather

*Not to let them have a monopoly on all the fun. Behold: Belvedere X of Eckford Street!


Nice balconies.

A Very Curious Phenomenon

January 27, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

(Or: The Franklin Street Lending Library)


Anyone who lives on Franklin Street near India  and has eyes (or ears) probably knows the story of this place. It used to be a garage but thanks to Karl Fischer (and the stringent criteria used for the issuance of modification permits) it is being “modified” GUTTED into a ten story luxury apartment building replete with professional office space. But the purpose of this post is not to malign this development (although it richly deserves it). Rather it is about a certain bicycle parked in the premises.


This bike, to be precise. Over the last month I have noticed a very curious phenomenon: people are leaving (exchanging?) books via its basket. Follow are a few visual aids (in chronological order) to give you a better idea what I’m talking about.


Three poetry books.


One book on web design.


My husband is a big fan of Neal Stephenson so after I took  the above photograph he nabbed this tome.


A how-to book about knitting and a book about contemporary American women artists.


The top book in this assortment is about pirates. It should be noted that took the above photograph at 8:00 p.m. When walked back by later (11:00 p.m.) the books were gone. Anyone know what’s going on here? If so, please share. My curiosity is driving me crazy!

Miss Heather

Retail Space For Rent On Franklin Street!

December 1, 2008 ·
Filed under: Abjectecture, Greenpoint Magic, Vomit 

WOW. 500 -3,400 square feet sounds pretty phat. As does 1,400 – 5,200 square feet of “professional space”. But there’s one hitch…

it hasn’t been built yet.

Here’s a photograph of floor one of Karl Fischer’s 200 Franklin Street Frankenfinger . It was taken November 27, 2008. Do you honestly think these clowns are going to have this floor (much less a second floor of “professional space” and the heap of crap above it) completed by February 2009? Really?

But I suppose hope GREED springs eternal.

Miss Heather

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