The Word On The Street: Presenting “Fuck You” Friday

It’s been a pretty busy week for yours truly. Today, however, I was able to take a day off to do a few things I wanted to do (versus stuff I have to do). I have had a lot of “have to dos” lately.

Upon disembarking the L at First Avenue in the East Village I, courtesy of LinkNYC, was presented with this self-care “tip”: call a friend.

No, no sir (or madam) this is simply not how it works here”, I thought to myself. “Telling someone to fuck off IS self-care.”

Believe you me, I want to tell quite a few folks to do just that nowadays. However, “punching up” could get me in (more) trouble. “Punching down” is not my style. “Punching laterally”, however, is fair game in my opinion.

If you need it— “it” being anything imaginable and beyond— New York City not only has it but will deliver it.

Right.
To.
Your.
Proverbial.
Fucking.
Doorstep.

We pay top dollar for this amenity. This is something outsiders do not understand. The freedom, the mental health benefits, which come with letting it all out in public. Fellow New Yorkers let you do it. We take it in turns. It’s an understood thing.

Sure enough, I was presented with such an opportunity today. Here’s how I put it on Twitter:

Then it occurred to me:

Why not roll out a compendium of “Fuck Yous” in their manifold forms as I see them?

There’s no more replenishable, locally-sourced resource as “Fuck You” in New York City.

So here we go!

First Avenue, East Village
First Avenue, East Village
Delancey Street, Lower East Side
Houston Street, Lower East Side
Manhattan Avenue, Greenpoint
Freeman Street, Greenpoint

And last, but hardly least, this contender from none other than Clay Street, Greenpoint, U.S.A. While “Fuck You” is not explicitly stated, the sentiment is there.

That’s the whole trouble. You can’t ever find a place that’s nice and peaceful, because there isn’t any. You may think there is, but once you get there, when you’re not looking, somebody’ll sneak up and write “Fuck you” right under your nose. Try it sometime. I think, even, if I ever die, and they stick me in a cemetery, and I have a tombstone and all, it’ll say “Holden Caulfield” on it, and then what year I was born and what year I died, and then right under that it’ll say “Fuck you.” I’m positive, in fact.*

— J.D. Salinger, “Catcher in the Rye”

*I am totally amenable to “Fuck You” being inscribed on my tombstone. The more the merrier. A person is defined by his— or her— enemies.

The Word On The Street: Season’s Greetings From Second Avenue

Second Avenue at East 5 Street nys

As spotted today just around the corner from the premises of the 9th Precinct. Closing on a related note…

  • Free Williamsburg has seen fit to publish a handy map of the establishments in Williamsburg which will be participating in this year’s SantaCon event. One establishment offers mechanical bull rides. Drunk Santa Testosteronathon + mechanical bull rides = culling the herd.
  • E.V. Grieve has excellent coverage regarding the “back and forth” between a number of elected officials and Norman Seigel, SantaCon’s hired attorney. I encourage any/all north Brooklyn residents to give it a read as I for one found the coalition of elected officials who saw fit to sign this letter almost as interesting as the ones who did not. Inasmuch as I can tell (and by all means correct me if I am wrong), the only signee who represents north Brooklyn (READ: Greenpoint/Williamsburg) is Daniel Squadron. This of course begs a number of questions. It should be noted the Brooklyn Borough President’s name is not to be found either. Not that I find this surprising, mind you. I don’t.



New York Shitty Pay Phone Du Jour: Al Fresco Hot Desking edition

December 10, 2015 ·
Filed under: 10009, 10012, East Village, East Village Manhattan, Street Furniture 

Al fresco office nys

Pay Phone Broadway at East 13 Street nys

Taken December 10, 2015.


From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: Howloween

Oscar Madison NYC Mobile Sever Farm at your service

Taken by C Ceres Merry.

New York Shitty Photo Du Jour: The Word On The Street

The Bowery NYS

Taken September 25, 2015.

The Word On The Street: Information

August 18, 2015 ·
Filed under: 10003, East Village, East Village Manhattan, The Word On The Street 

The Age of Information nys

From East 4 Street.

The Word On The Street: Astor Place

Astor Place 8152015 nys

Taken August 15, 2015.

New York Shitty Feral Mattress Watch: Peretz Square

Peretz Square nys

Taken August 3, 2015.

The Word On The Street: Special Bond Street Edition

Honesty nys

Taken June 6, 2015.

The Word On The Street, Part I: Bowery

bowery nys

Taken March 26, 2015.

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