New York Shitty Street Seating du Jour: Greenpoint Selections

August 23, 2011 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Street Furniture 

Dupont Street

Eagle Street

Java Street

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Street Seating du Jour: McCarren Park

Taken June 1, 2011.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Photo Pool, Part II: Nothing Really Mattress

May 16, 2011 ·
Filed under: 10002, Chinatown, Chinatown Manhattan, Feral Furniture 


Taken by chudko.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: 37 Days Later

Today was full of surprises for yours truly. For starters, I received a phone call around noon from my buddy Mitch from the Newtown Pentacle. This conversation started (more or less) as follows:

Hey, this is Mitch. Want to go for a walk?

Me: Sure, when?

Mitch: I’m outside your building.

Needless to say I tossed on some clothes and off we went. As is my habit I showed him the finer points of all things north Greenpoint. This of course included the “Fuck Me” chair. Be they college students interviewing me for their assignments, friends who have not learned the good news about the curious phenomenon or otherwise I always make it a point to show them this piece of Greenpointiana. This item is, in my humble opinion, an example of what makes my community so special.

As we approached I thought I was in for another surprise. One which was not so pleasant.

Oh my god! I… I… think it is gone, Mitch!

I exclaimed. Fortunately this turned out not to be the case. As you will see.

Here’s looking at you, kid!

Miss Heather

Southside Feral Furniture Watch: WTF

From Keap Street & South 5 Street.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Street Seating Watch: 30 Days Later

Taken May 1, 2011.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Street Seating Watch: 25 Days Later

Earlier this week I had the pleasure of playing tour guide for a New School student who is studying our fair burgh. I concluded our jaunt around the Garden Spot with a visit to yours truly’s favorite piece of street seating. As you can see it has been, um, marked.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Street Seating Watch: 23 Days Later

Now we’ve lost a letter…

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Street Seating Watch: 19 Days Later

It would appear someone has gotten a little rough with our intrepid (and lewd) piece of street seating. One can only imagine what led up to this…

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Bye, Bye Beamer

The above images were shot by Jay Lombard, who writes:

I was driving on mcguinness when I spotted the tow truck with NYPD escort. Our little wayward Beamer buddy from NH got dragged out of Greenpoint in grand fashion! Thanks for calling attention to this hunk o’ junk.

I have a confession to make: I feel a certain sense of loss. I mean, I am happy to see this eyesore being towed but I did find the detritus it was attracting downright fascinating from an anthropological stand-point. My conclusions are as follows:

  1. Someone in the surrounding environs really likes bananas.
  2. Someone in the surrounding environs keeps a bag of cat shit handy for such occasions. Or at least this is what I am envisioning/hoping: a Garden Spot Johnny Appleseed of sorts, if you will. But instead of marking his territory with fruit-bearing horticulture he his medium/message of choice is cat shit.

UPDATE, 4:45 p.m.: I just got off the phone with D.I. Hurson of the 94th Precinct. He gave me the skinny on what happened. VERY simply put, the plates placed on this car did not match the registration sticker on the dashboard. Apparently this is a fairly commonplace practice when someone wants to avoid registering cars in our fair state. Anyway, New York State tags and registration are easy to cross-reference at a glance because they will have matching numbers. In this case they had to do some cross-referencing in order to deduce this vehicle was (in all probability) abandoned. So there you go!

Miss Heather

P.S.: For what it is worth, the Banker Street comfy chair is still with us.

Someone has even gone to the trouble to move it so as to conceal the objectionable “language”. Nice.


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