Greenpoint
Lorven Pharmacy
Culture on the Cheap
From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: MTA Sucks
This priceless exchange (which hails from the 23rd – Ely Avenue subway station in Queens) comes courtesy of Victoria Belanger. Great catch!
Miss Heather
Fedders Friday Long Island City Style: The People Have Spoken!
Filed under: Abjectecture, Articles of Fedderization, Fedders Friday, Long Island City, Queens
On Tuesday, March 3, 2009 I wrote:
No matter how hard I try my wit, gift for gab, whatever-you-want-to-call-it is not doing this stellar example of Fedderism justice. To this end I need your help. Although I realize this has been done before I am proposing the following: you, dear readers, tender LOL speak captions for this masterpiece. These can be left in the comments below or sent via email at: missheather (at) newyorkshitty (dot) com.
If I like what I see I’ll publish the pick of the litter right here on New York Shitty later this week.
Well, things got a little chaotic for me that week so this had to be tabled. But this is not to suggest I didn’t have 49-16 11 Street on my mind. I most certainly did. Among other things I wondered to myself:
Is this building as craptastic in day light as it is at night.
I did a little field research and found the answer.
Abso-FUCKING-lutely YES.
Now, without further ado I offer for your Friday morning entertainment piquant observations about this stellar structure from you, the readers.* Enjoy!
AMOJA wrote:
…I think I may start calling this building the Triple Nipple. Those studs are…well…they’re there.
This is the most effort I’ve ever seen put into a Friedrich box.
Nah…that’s a cesspool on the roof.
The builder is just too cheap to pay for a hook up to NYC’s sewer system!
Okay, so we have heard about the builder. What about the architect? Another anonymous offers up his theory as to who is responsible for this turd:
Design by Helen Keller.
And last, but hardly least I want to give special props to lylet (who actually followed my directions for this project). He mused:
I drive over the Pulaski every day – and this building has been testing my gag reflex for months now. While many don’t like the new building across the bridge, at least is qualifies as some sort of ‘architecture’ (and I actually happen to like it). This, however, looks like a Belvedere made babies with a Fedders Special – and out came this cheapo be-nippled eyesore. And did they build the elevator shaft for a few extra floors that never materialized?…
Indeed.
Miss Heather
*And a whole lotta help from Queens Crap!
Reader Participation Time: Snarkitecture
The Mister and I do not make it to Long Island City as much as we used to. There are a number of reasons for this. Among them:
- The weather. It’s been too cold to venture out.
- We have taken to going to Sunnyside and Jackson Heights instead. This is because…
- quite frankly we find Long Island City kind of depressing.
Ever since they demolished that beautiful old building at 10-62 Jackson Avenue and replaced it with a shiv-like structure we cannot cross the Pulaski Bridge without wincing. Luckily we had a craving for Italian food this weekend and decided to go to Manettas. As we made our way down the bridge we were presented with a most unexpected treat: 49-16 11 Street.
This stunning example of Strip Mall Italian (replete with a Donald Judd-esque elevator shaft) sent us into fits of uncontrollable laughter.
Where do you start with this? Hell, where do you finish for that matter?
For starters you have the lovely Juliet style balconies overlooking the on ramp of the Pulaski Bridge.
Just a beer bottle’s throw away from traffic (and perhaps the odd pedestrian or bicyclist).
Some attempt at symmetry has been made… but not quite enough. I christen this daring new style Art Sucko.
But no expense has been spared on Friedrichs boxes. This is a good thing. When the dull roar of truck traffic (at all hours) gets to be too much for our intrepid 49-16ers they can crank up the air conditioner to drown out the din.
The last time I saw something with this many studs on it was in the West Village. (WARNING: previous link is NSFW.)
No matter how hard I try my wit, gift for gab, whatever-you-want-to-call-it is not doing this stellar example of Fedderism justice. To this end I need your help. Although I realize this has been done before I am proposing the following: you, dear readers, tender LOL speak captions for this masterpiece. These can be left in the comments below or sent via email at: missheather (at) newyorkshitty (dot) com.
If I like what I see I’ll publish the pick of the litter right here on New York Shitty later this week.
Your immediate attention to this matter is greatly appreciated.
Happy snarking!
Miss Heather
Morning Photos Du Jour: Shadows
Leonard Street, Greenpoint.
Meserole Avenue, Greenpoint.
Driggs Avenue, Williamsburg.
Jackson Avenue, Long Island City.
Miss Heather
Subway Video Du Jour: The G Train Strut
As mentioned in this post, the Mister and I ventured to Long Island City for dinner last weekend. It was delicious (La Vuelta has yet to disappoint). But as with all things in life— be they good or bad— our evening came to an end. We needed to go home. This of course entailed taking the Crosstown Local. The G train. The “Gee, where is it”? The “Go nowhere” train. Call it what thou whilst.
Unlike many I do not take issue with the Crosstown’s lack of punctuality. In fact I am grateful for it’s zen-like service as it has worked wonders for taming my Type A personality. I was once an impatient and impetuous public transportation novice but the Jedi masters behind this line have seen fit to teach me a most valuable gift: patience. I take things a little slower and savor the little things in life nowadays. Like this guy.
(TIP: listen to “Jimmy James” or “No Sleep Til Brooklyn” by the Beastie Boys while watching the following.)
The Mister could not understand my fascination with this chap. He wanted to get home fast and was upset I was lagging behind. It ended up making no difference: shortly after this chap descended the stairwell our train was ready to go. It was as if the G waiting for him (and maybe it was— after all, this dude is cool beyond compare).
It just goes to show that some of us bear no shame whatsoever for being patrons of the Crosstown Local. Sure, we pretty much have to transfer to get anywhere— but it also gives us the opportunity to hold our heads up and roll out a most badass strut.
Bravo!
Miss Heather
Subway Photos Du Jour
From the Queens bound platform of the Crosstown Local at Metropolitan Avenue.
From the Smith – 9th bound platform of the Crosstown Local at Metropolitan Avenue.
From The Queens bound platform at 21st Street.
From the Manhattan bound platform of the E/V at 23rd Street – Ely Avenue.
Miss Heather
Long Island City Photo Du Jour: Baracked?
The Mister and I passed this tonight while walking to La Vuelta* for dinner. I say it’s Barack Obama. He says it isn’t. Draw your own conclusions.
Miss Heather
*Who, it should be mentioned, DOES deliver to Greenpoint!
Citypoint Photos Du Jour: From Newtown Creek With Love
From north Brooklyn’s (or southwestern Queens’s) Seine.
When I look westward to Manhattan I do not see a pretty skyline. Rather, I envision an infinite number of bowel movements, vomit and detritus that will soon find their way two blocks from my home.
Stand up and be counted, Greenpoint, for the shit you are about to receive!
Nobel prize winners, diplomats— PRESIDENTS— and Joey Arak* have graced my neighborhood with the by-products of their respective genius. Maybe I’ll pick up a fraction of their gifts via schnozmosis? I can only hope so. It’s been especially stanktastic of late.
The bigger the stench = the bigger the brain?
Miss Heather
*This is not necessarily sarcasm.
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