From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: In Like A Lion…

Taken by Robert S.

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: On The (C) Town

March 7, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11222, BAD ASS, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

(Or: Friday Night On Manhattan Avenue, Bitches!)

Taken March 7, 2014

This Is Just Plain Awesome…

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My buddy and all-around environmental BADASS Laura has taken up painting recently. Although her creations are all quite lovely and whimsical, this one (for obvious reasons)  is a stand-out. It simply had to be shared. About its creation she writes:

A walk to the Digester Eggs followed with some 60′s psychedelic music, incense and candles, topped with some community issues translates into this for me…

I give this piece two enthusiastic New York Shitty thumbs up!

Now For Rent In Ridgewood…

November 19, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11385, BAD ASS, Queens, Ridgewood, Ridgewood Queens, Wow, WTF 

Cl2bedroom

Living Room with neon and bar stools

Hall of mirrors

bitchin kitchen!

This. I have tried— and tried— to find the words to describe what you have just seen. Thankfully the owner of this apartment has been lavish with the photo-documentation. What these pictures have to say is way more than the proverbial 1,000 words. Note “the value-added” in the manner of a disco ball (and what appears to be laundry) hanging in the living room. Simply magnificent! Best to simply check out this listing check out the screengrabs and behold the, um, glory for yourself.  You will not be disappointed!

Special props go out to Diana Gee for stumbling upon this gem. Simply amazing.

UPDATE, 10:19 pm: For shits and giggles I emailed our landlord informing him that we were breaking our lease because we found our dream home in Ridgewood. Follows is his reply:

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Very astute observation. As you can plainly see, gentle readers, some landlords do have a sense of humor. Conclusion: if this apartment has a soundtrack (and a gnarly HiFI system is undoubtedly among its manifold amenities) it would be something by the Eagles. Or better yet this:

Honorable mention: the Miami Vice theme song.

UPDATE, November 20th, 2013: It has been brought to my attention that if one “Googles” the phone numbers listed on this advert, some mighty interesting results come up. Follows is yours truly’s personal favorite.

Millionaires Palace>

This listing truly is the gift that keeps on giving. Cheers!

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Horsecrap

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That, “Horsecrap”, the title of the email I received from an anonymous tipster. With a certain level of reluctance I opened it and, as you can see, what I beheld was beyond my wildest imagination (and I can imagine an awful lot). Sometimes one finds love—

horsecrap

or at least its, um, droppings— in the strangest of places. In this case McGuinness Boulevard just a stone’s throw from the Shit Tits. Well done, fellow Greenpointers (?). WELL DONE!

P.S.: I wish I had done this when I married my prince charming, the Mister, almost eight years ago. Of course our anniversary is coming up on Halloween. Hmm…

New York Shitty Video Du Jour: Live From The ULURP Review Meeting

Angry Panther

I am pleased to announce there was a terrific turn-out at this last evening’s proceedings. Not only did my fellow Greenpointers show up— but they SPOKE UP! So much so, I suspect I will be up quite late uploading all the footage. I cannot say I am exactly fond of pulling all-nighters. However, I realize a lot of concerned folks could not attend this hearing and would find the footage of interest. What’s more when bits Greenpoint glory are to be shared with the general public like this…

Best Public Speaker EVER from Miss Heather on Vimeo.

…well, then as far as I am concerned, it is totally time well spent. I will share everything in (hopefully) chronological order in two separate posts: one for 77 Commercial and one for Greenpoint Landing. For reasons which require no explanation I felt this citizen (who was speaking in regards to 77 Commercial) merited her own post— and a New York Shitty salute! It is both an honor and a privilege to call you a neighbor, Nancy.

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Manhattan Avenue

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I cannot think of a better way to while away a lovely Friday afternoon in the Garden Spot than, say, doing a dozen chin-ups courtesy of a crosswalk signal. Go out there and get ripped, Greenpoint!

New York Shitty Photos Du Jour: The Manhattan Avenue Wienerfest, Day Two

yesterday

 

As some of you might recall, yesterday I encountered the above installation while running a few errands. What you may not know is who is responsible for this chicanery. His name is Josef, and he is quite awesome. Which brings me to today…

installation1

 

He has added quite a bit of new material. Including:

umbrella

 

These two missives. He elaborated on the one to the right. It reads:

Everywhere. Everyday. We’re with you.

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This was gleaned from an advertisement for TD Bank. He explained to me that that DOMA being overturned made him quite happy because:

I do not care who you love— or who loves who.

Right on— but let’s continue.

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Here’s a rather lovely mirror graced by one of Josef’s paintings. He employed dried parsley, poppy seeds and mustard seeds so as to give it some “texture”.

portrait

 

This is portrait of himself “back in the day” with some blue paint thrown in for good measure.

NOKIELBASA

 

And a few slices of bread and a paint brush now accompany the kiwi fruit.

Where’s the kielbasa?

I inquired. His answer was somewhat hard to decipher. But here it goes:

  1. Ne noted it was fascinating how the sun seemed to cook it. I countered that given how hot it is, this is not surprising.
  2. Someone stole it. (To eat? Who knows.)
  3. Someone posted a picture of it on the Internet.

Was it you?

He added. I answered to the affirmative. He went on the explain that he could not afford kielbasa today, so slices of bread will have to do. I mulled this development over. ”Fuck it”, I thought to myself. “I may not be a Medici or a Guggenheim but I am going to do my part to patronize a local artist”.

Here’s five dollars. Go get some kielbasa and some lunch.

And went on my way.

When I came back home I stopped to see if Josef kept his word. Well, the following speaks for itself…

kielbasarestored

 

Alas he was not present. (I wanted to request he place a sign next to the meat stick stating “Weiner For Mayor”). However you can see both bread and kielbasa were procured. The latter has been hung (pun completely intended) for everyone’s edification.

pricetagandcards

What’s more, Josef left the price tag of his purchase (so as to ensure my donation was spent on sausage) AND he left business cards for the establishment from which he procured said meaty goodness: W-Nassau Meat Market. This makes for one of the most inspired low budget advertising campaigns in my humble opinion. Is it ideologically consistent for a vegetarian to enable this hooliganism? No, probably not. But it is awesome nonetheless. Viva Greenpoint!

New York Shitty Photo Du Jour: Fifth On Fifth

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Granted, the photo could have— should have— been better. But this gentleman’s apparel and stance is flawless. So there!

The Word On The Street, Part II: One Of Us!

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From Madison Street.