THIS WEEK: Mixtape & Street Crush

February 9, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Today’s offerings of artistic goodness this upcoming Friday come courtesy of Jason who is not only a New York Shitty reader, but is also a featured artist in both of the following events. Mazel tov!

mixtapenys

First up, 717 Studio will be  having an opening this Friday, February 13, for Mixtape: Music Spurred By Music & Light. Here’s the 411 as to what this show is about from their press release:

Through the curatorial efforts of Laina Karavani, Graham Slick, and Raquel Lauren, 717 Studio brings you “Mixtape.” Much like a well selected hour -long mix of music, this showing satisfies the desire for everything from the visual to the tactile with sculpture, painting, light, color, and materials from familiar to questionable. We have found the ultimate blend of creativity by contribution of the artists, each arranging a  music set to accompany the expressive works.

As you can see the list of artists is pretty extensive —at least enough so to preclude me listing and linking to each of them here. However, if you click here you can will get a fairly comprehensive list of their web sites featuring their work your perusal.

Mixtape
February 13, 2009 7:00 – 10:00 p.m.
717 Studio
717 Manhattan Avenue, #2A
Brooklyn, New York 11222

streetcrush

The very same night the Alphabeta boys will be throwing a pre-Valentine’s Day blow out featuring some of the biggest names in street art out there (like Poster Boy!), a kissing booth and burlesque from the likes of Nasty Canasta (should there be any other kind?) and Clams Casino; and music courtesy of MC Tigger. The suggested donation for this event is $8.00 and things are scheduled to kick off at 7:00 p.m. For more information about this event you can click on the above flier or check out Brooklyn Street Art’s web site.

Street Crush
February 13, 2009, 7:00 p.m. – 12:00 a.m.
Alphabeta
70 Greenpoint Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11222

Be advised there will be an after party next door at CoCo 68 too!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Caveat

February 9, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

planc

This public service announcement comes courtesy of the Polish-American Pharmacy on Leonard Street. Be sure to use protection this upcoming Valentine’s Day weekend. Not only is this the responsible thing to do but it will prevent you from learning what “Plan C” is nine months later.

Miss Heather

Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: Street Cat

February 9, 2009 ·
Filed under: Crazy Cat Lady, Street Art, Williamsburg 

streetcatnys

From Lorimer Street.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Mattress Watch

February 9, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

greenpoint-ave-mattressnys

Some of you might remember the above image. I posted it a week ago today in a post entitled “Food For Thought”. Well, it’s one week later and I am pleased to announce this convenient bit of street furniture is not only still there…

gptavemattress

but someone has seen fit to appoint it with a heaping helping of Halite…

whitepages

and the latest edition of the Verizon White Pages. You know, lest you awaken with the utmost desire to reach out and touch someone.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox

February 9, 2009 ·
Filed under: Area 51, Greenpoint Magic 

monologuemachineAs some of you can probably imagine I, the proprietress of New York Shitty, get some pretty interesting emails on occasion. Some would say this is due to the “Law of Attraction”. I disagree: the Internet in and of itself is a haven for cranks of all stripes. Thankfully the following missive (which I received Saturday night) is not of the cranky variety; it is a business proposition and a damned compelling one at that. Lee writes (in an email entitled Monologue Machines and Shitfone):

I love your photos and writing. I have this software project I’m working on

It was inspired by your photos, one of which I would like to be the background for the application’s user interface. Would you be down with that? I promise it’ll do your work justice.

After some consideration (and consultation with the Mister) I acquiesced:

Dear Mr. or Ms. (excised):

Before I get to down to business I have to say this is one of the oddest emails I have received to date (and believe you me, I have gotten some real DOOZIES). This is not to suggest I am off-put by your request. I am not. I am strangely touched by it— if for no other reason than to know someone else out there enjoys the manifold ways people in this fine city see fit to desecrate public pay phones.

The previous having been said I am tentatively amenable to you using my image(s). I say “tentative” because here’s what I suggest to/ask of you in return:

1. If you need higher resolution images (which I suspect you might) let me know so I can hunt them down and forward them to you.
2. The Greenpoint monologue machine: if my memory serves me correctly it has accumulated even more detritus (beer bottles, cigarette packs, etc.). I can send you a newer image if you wish.
3. I am given credit for my images.
4. (most importantly) If you make a shit load of money off this software I want stock. This Greenpoint gal is always looking for a golden parachute. Taking photographs of fucked up pay phones— while enjoyable— doesn’t pay for shit. Perhaps some day I can cash ’em out and buy one of those fancy condos they’re building on McGuinness Boulevard.

Let me know— and thanks for your inquiry! It made my day.

Inspired by the prospect of becoming software mogul (and having a rooftop terrace overlooking our very own Shit Tits) I paid the Monologue Machine a visit yesterday. Not only is the owner of the bodega (where this item is located) a big fan of this retro-fitted anti-communication device, but he told me a great many people have stopped by and taken pictures of it. Who knew? Maybe the time for Shitfone has, indeed, come?

Miss Heather

Williamspoint Photos Du Jour: Special Valentine’s Day Edition

February 9, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

Since Valentine’s Day is just around the corner I am going to kick off today’s offerings with a few photographs to help get my fellow north Brooklynites in that lovin’ state of mind. Enjoy!

falloutshelter

From Kingsland Avenue.

loveme

From Metropolitan Avenue.

ilovegod

From Graham Avenue.

iloveyou

poopnbutt

From Newel Street.

Miss Heather

Bushwick Photo Du Jour: Bunny

February 8, 2009 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Williamsburg 

bunnynys

From Flushing Avenue.

Miss Heather

Williamsburg Photo Du Jour: Of Peace & Progress

February 8, 2009 ·
Filed under: Williamsburg 

peaceandprogressnys

From Wythe Avenue.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: No Dogs Allowed

February 8, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

wishbonerevnys

Yes, I know you shouldn’t leave your pup unattended nowadays for fear of having him (or her) dognapped for reward money. But sometimes a woman needs a canine to stand watch over her Stayfrees while picking up a bottle of milk (and a candy bar or two). This one goes out to you, Wishbone. You’re a damned good (and most cute) protector of feminine hygiene products!

Miss Heather

Citypoint Photos Du Jour: From Newtown Creek With Love

February 7, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Long Island City, Newtown Creek 

redpoint2nys1

redpointnys1

From north Brooklyn’s (or southwestern Queens’s) Seine.

When I look westward to Manhattan I do not see a pretty skyline. Rather, I envision an infinite number of bowel movements, vomit and detritus that will soon find their way two blocks from my home.

Stand up and be counted, Greenpoint, for the shit you are about to receive!

Nobel prize winners, diplomats— PRESIDENTS— and Joey Arak* have graced my neighborhood with the by-products of their respective genius. Maybe I’ll pick up a fraction of their gifts via schnozmosis? I can only hope so. It’s been especially stanktastic of late.

The bigger the stench = the bigger the brain?

Miss Heather

*This is not necessarily sarcasm.