Spotted At 230 Bogart Street: Vacate Order

December 22, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11206, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Wow, WTF 

Today, being the second day of winter and unseasonably warm, yours truly decided to go out for a bit. The original purpose was to secure foodstuffs for Christmas dinner. This did come to pass, albeit with a number of detours— and detours from the aforementioned detours.  I had a hankering to check out our local Industrial Business Zone. More specifically: I wanted to check in on my favorite feral feline: Callie. This I did, as you can see. The guys at SGI, Peter in particular, pamper this pussy to no end. I love those guys! But I digress.

En route I happened upon this curiosity.

It would appear that Christmas came early to 230 Bogart Street in the way of a Vacate Order. WAIT— make that a PEREMPTORY Vacate Order.

You know what they say:

Life is a cabaret!

Except when said cabaret is bereft of a permit and adequate fire protection— in an Industrial Business Zone in Brooklyn. Whoops.

Brooklyn Beast, the business which graced the first floor of this edifice, has posted a notice on the door…

and online. Yours truly is particularly intriqgued by the following (which dates from December 16th):

We are deeply saddened to announce that due to unforeseen circumstances we were forced to close our doors at 230 Bogart St. We have had an unbelievable year that changed all of our lives. The friends and families we’ve met over the year have continuously encouraged us to further spread our mission to inspire others through movement…

Families? This would suggest there were children on the premises. Nice. But the piece de resistance is this:

Special thanks goes out to Queens Crap for helping me research this. Ho! Ho! Ho!

This post is dedicated to the lovely ladies I had the pleasure of waiting— and waiting— at the B43 bus stop at Cook Street for ~40 minutes.

FBscB43bus

A bunch of pissed off “old” ladies with bags of groceries in tow and a ladder company of New York’s Bravest make for a heady mix.

Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Manhattan Avenue

December 20, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Urban Artifact, WTF 

Taken December 20, 2013.

Quicklink: DNA.info

December 18, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

dnainfoscChoice quote/teaser:

“I’ve had more people call to complain about the lights than people call about homeless people dying in the park,” said Jeff Mann, head of the Greenpoint Chamber of Commerce, referencing an ongoing issue facing the community. “It’s absolutely embarrassing and shameful that Greenpoint doesn’t have holiday lights.”

Um, and homeless people dying on our streets and parks is not embarrassing and shameful? You can’t make this shit up, folks. Otherwise, New York Shitty wishes to know why the Argentos/Broadway Stages have not stepped up to the plate and offered to make these lights happen. I mean, they own a company called Luna Lighting. Oh wait, that got busted by the Business Integrity Commission for operating an illegal trade waste business. Nevermind…

 

 

Quicklink: Pillars Of The Community

December 9, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Criminal Activity, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

BICscObservation: operating an illegal waste handling business (in Greenpoint no less) and having ~$1,000,000 in Federal tax liens are characteristics not generally associated with being a pillar of the community. Then again, we’re talking about north Brooklyn. NOTE: something my colleague Queens Crap fails to point out is Ms. Gina Argento-(Ciafone) is a member of our local Community Board. No Kidding.  Read it and weep…

I would be remiss if I did not remind everyone that in 2011 Mr. Argento offered a $5,000 reward for information leading to the arrest of a graffiti artist called BS (“Buttless Supreme”). Perhaps I am being petty, but quite frankly I find an allegation of illegal waste handing a mite bit more troubling. You can’t make this shit up folks. Start at 2:44 and see Tony Argento complain about graffiti “destroying the neighborhood” at this meeting of the 94th Precinct Community Council* for yourselves!

*The 94th Community Council (which is run but kick -ass ladies all) has given a plaque to Mr. Argento in appreciate of his contributions to the community. Of course this was before this Business Integrity Commission decisions was rendered. Whoops.

UPDATE, 10:38 p.m.: It has been brought to my attention that Gina Argento-Ciafone went on the record to none other than the New York Times about the graffiti problem here. This came to pass on August 9, 2013. Fascinating.

The Word On The Street: BK Love

November 26, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

BK Love

Norman Avenue 11262013

Holy Crap

From Norman Avenue.

Now For Rent In Ridgewood…

November 19, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11385, BAD ASS, Queens, Ridgewood, Ridgewood Queens, Wow, WTF 

Cl2bedroom

Living Room with neon and bar stools

Hall of mirrors

bitchin kitchen!

This. I have tried— and tried— to find the words to describe what you have just seen. Thankfully the owner of this apartment has been lavish with the photo-documentation. What these pictures have to say is way more than the proverbial 1,000 words. Note “the value-added” in the manner of a disco ball (and what appears to be laundry) hanging in the living room. Simply magnificent! Best to simply check out this listing check out the screengrabs and behold the, um, glory for yourself.  You will not be disappointed!

Special props go out to Diana Gee for stumbling upon this gem. Simply amazing.

UPDATE, 10:19 pm: For shits and giggles I emailed our landlord informing him that we were breaking our lease because we found our dream home in Ridgewood. Follows is his reply:

email

 

Very astute observation. As you can plainly see, gentle readers, some landlords do have a sense of humor. Conclusion: if this apartment has a soundtrack (and a gnarly HiFI system is undoubtedly among its manifold amenities) it would be something by the Eagles. Or better yet this:

Honorable mention: the Miami Vice theme song.

UPDATE, November 20th, 2013: It has been brought to my attention that if one “Googles” the phone numbers listed on this advert, some mighty interesting results come up. Follows is yours truly’s personal favorite.

Millionaires Palace>

This listing truly is the gift that keeps on giving. Cheers!

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: Java Street Pop-Up Park

November 3, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Criminal Activity, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

Geese

geese and barbed wire

Ever had one of those moments when a something— let’s say gut instinct— tells you:

Something has changed here.

Well, I had one such moment today while visiting the Java Street Pop-Up Park.

Java Street Pop-Up Park November 3 2013

No gentle readers, I am not making reference to the fence which has found its way into the East River. That came to my attention on October 8th. No, this is something else.

Something Is Missing

There used to be something here as I recall. A park bench, perhaps?

Park Bench

Why yes, that’s what was there!!! I wonder where it went?

Park Bench Taking A Dip

Oh, I see it has joined its friend the fence for a dip in the East River.

Man Overboard

Impressive. But of course, I doubt this would have been possible had the fence been repaired in a timely fashion. But it wasn’t—- so now we have this vision to greet visitors disembarking from the East River Ferry. I am certain it will work wonders for our burgeoning tourism industry.

gooseandfencecrop

I imagine it is only a matter of time before a goose gets hurt on the barbed wire on said fence. For all I know this may have happened already. It’s not like they have the ability to call 911…

From The New York Shitty Inbox: F*ck Them

October 30, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, BULLSHIT, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

Fuck MonstantoNYS

As some of you might recall I made a last minute announcement about a meeting regarding the future of Box Street Park. More specifically, there are some folks in our community who want to see this piece of public park space as a hang out and “chill” kind of place (“passive space”) as opposed to an athletic field. The latter is what has been proposed by the Parks Department.

martymaherQuite frankly, I had been— albeit slightly— leaning in favor of “passive space”. After being notified by a tipster that this park/athletic field will sport (as Marty Maher,  Brooklyn Parks Chief of Staff, as seen at left) stated that Chemgrass “may” be used I raised an eyebrow— and changed my mind. My tipster went on to opine that it sounded like something from the 1960’s. That is because, gentle readers, it IS from the 1960’s.

And our planet’s eco-terrorists good neighbors Monsanto, holds the patent for it.

chemgrass600dpi

Given the amount of environmental abuse this community has experienced— and continues to experience— presently, can we:

  1. Get a park with real grass in it?
  2. And not fill the coffers of a corporation that has no respect for the environment— or people— for that matter?

Then again:

Given the park space in question is the former MTA/Access-A-Ride depot at 65 Commercial Street…


View Larger Map

and contrary to prevailing real estate trends, was sold by our fair city to Clipper Equities…

(the developers behind 77 Commercial Street and its proposed “poor door”) at $8,000,000 (versus the original asking price of $12,000,000 back in 2008).

Should I really be surprised? Outraged (once again), yes! Surprised? No, not in the very least I am sad to say.

175 AMI: Or exactly WHAT constitutes "Low/Moderate/Middle" Income?

I mean, after all, what Greenpoint really needs is affordable housing at 175% AMI. Or at least Clipper Equities does— that way they can pass along the “charitable act” (more specifically its cost) of building this park (which, in return, they get to build a 40 story tower) onto their tenants— all of them.

Let them— or would that be us— eat cake, Astroturf, CHEMGRASS!

The Credulity Files: As Gleaned From Craigslist & The North Brooklyn Community Group

October 25, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11211, 11249, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn, Wow, WTF 

Wellnessburg

If there is one thing yours truly really loves, it is a really good prank. Especially one that makes light of how ridiculous the monetization of our parks has become. CASE IN POINT: the response this solicitation (albeit updated) received on the North Brooklyn Community Group on Facebook.

NBCCG String

New York Shitty Analysis:

  • At a very casual glance I fell for this. After all, I have been suggested to “like” Motherburg,,,

Motherburg

 

  • and I no longer rule out any event as being so ridiculous or totally irrelevant to the community here if it is “artsy”. Or more importantly: garners revenue.
  • By all appearances it would appear other people hereabouts harbor the same mindset. Rather sad, isn’t it?
  • Nonetheless, we harbor it for a reason. Our community’s parks, as few as they are, are being disproportionately monetized for events which cater to people— lots of people— who reside outside the community. More specifically their: capacious wallets. What do we, as citizens, get out of this arrangement? Not much as far as I can tell.
  • In any case props go out to Joe Lentol for actually looking into this. This is what a public servant should do!

Spotted At Java Street Pop-Up Park

October 8, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

Java Street Pop Up ParkNYS

As captured today, October 8th, 2013. Can someone please explain to me exactly what happened here? Anyone? In any case, it does not exactly give a stellar impression of my community to the manifold number of tourists who patronize the East River Ferry (whose pier can be seen in the background).

  • NYS Flickr Pool

    All I Want Is EverythingSelling Nouget Candy Torrone at the Feast of San Gennaro Festival
  • Ads