Quicklink: Pillars Of The Community

December 9, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Criminal Activity, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

BICscObservation: operating an illegal waste handling business (in Greenpoint no less) and having ~$1,000,000 in Federal tax liens are characteristics not generally associated with being a pillar of the community. Then again, we’re talking about north Brooklyn. NOTE: something my colleague Queens Crap fails to point out is Ms. Gina Argento-(Ciafone) is a member of our local Community Board. No Kidding.  Read it and weep…

I would be remiss if I did not remind everyone that in 2011 Mr. Argento offered a $5,000 reward for information leading to the arrest of a graffiti artist called BS (“Buttless Supreme”). Perhaps I am being petty, but quite frankly I find an allegation of illegal waste handing a mite bit more troubling. You can’t make this shit up folks. Start at 2:44 and see Tony Argento complain about graffiti “destroying the neighborhood” at this meeting of the 94th Precinct Community Council* for yourselves!

*The 94th Community Council (which is run but kick -ass ladies all) has given a plaque to Mr. Argento in appreciate of his contributions to the community. Of course this was before this Business Integrity Commission decisions was rendered. Whoops.

UPDATE, 10:38 p.m.: It has been brought to my attention that Gina Argento-Ciafone went on the record to none other than the New York Times about the graffiti problem here. This came to pass on August 9, 2013. Fascinating.

The Word On The Street: BK Love

November 26, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

BK Love

Norman Avenue 11262013

Holy Crap

From Norman Avenue.

Now For Rent In Ridgewood…

November 19, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11385, BAD ASS, Queens, Ridgewood, Ridgewood Queens, Wow, WTF 

Cl2bedroom

Living Room with neon and bar stools

Hall of mirrors

bitchin kitchen!

This. I have tried— and tried— to find the words to describe what you have just seen. Thankfully the owner of this apartment has been lavish with the photo-documentation. What these pictures have to say is way more than the proverbial 1,000 words. Note “the value-added” in the manner of a disco ball (and what appears to be laundry) hanging in the living room. Simply magnificent! Best to simply check out this listing check out the screengrabs and behold the, um, glory for yourself.  You will not be disappointed!

Special props go out to Diana Gee for stumbling upon this gem. Simply amazing.

UPDATE, 10:19 pm: For shits and giggles I emailed our landlord informing him that we were breaking our lease because we found our dream home in Ridgewood. Follows is his reply:

email

 

Very astute observation. As you can plainly see, gentle readers, some landlords do have a sense of humor. Conclusion: if this apartment has a soundtrack (and a gnarly HiFI system is undoubtedly among its manifold amenities) it would be something by the Eagles. Or better yet this:

Honorable mention: the Miami Vice theme song.

UPDATE, November 20th, 2013: It has been brought to my attention that if one “Googles” the phone numbers listed on this advert, some mighty interesting results come up. Follows is yours truly’s personal favorite.

Millionaires Palace>

This listing truly is the gift that keeps on giving. Cheers!

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: Java Street Pop-Up Park

November 3, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Criminal Activity, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

Geese

geese and barbed wire

Ever had one of those moments when a something— let’s say gut instinct— tells you:

Something has changed here.

Well, I had one such moment today while visiting the Java Street Pop-Up Park.

Java Street Pop-Up Park November 3 2013

No gentle readers, I am not making reference to the fence which has found its way into the East River. That came to my attention on October 8th. No, this is something else.

Something Is Missing

There used to be something here as I recall. A park bench, perhaps?

Park Bench

Why yes, that’s what was there!!! I wonder where it went?

Park Bench Taking A Dip

Oh, I see it has joined its friend the fence for a dip in the East River.

Man Overboard

Impressive. But of course, I doubt this would have been possible had the fence been repaired in a timely fashion. But it wasn’t—- so now we have this vision to greet visitors disembarking from the East River Ferry. I am certain it will work wonders for our burgeoning tourism industry.

gooseandfencecrop

I imagine it is only a matter of time before a goose gets hurt on the barbed wire on said fence. For all I know this may have happened already. It’s not like they have the ability to call 911…

From The New York Shitty Inbox: F*ck Them

October 30, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, BULLSHIT, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

Fuck MonstantoNYS

As some of you might recall I made a last minute announcement about a meeting regarding the future of Box Street Park. More specifically, there are some folks in our community who want to see this piece of public park space as a hang out and “chill” kind of place (“passive space”) as opposed to an athletic field. The latter is what has been proposed by the Parks Department.

martymaherQuite frankly, I had been— albeit slightly— leaning in favor of “passive space”. After being notified by a tipster that this park/athletic field will sport (as Marty Maher,  Brooklyn Parks Chief of Staff, as seen at left) stated that Chemgrass “may” be used I raised an eyebrow— and changed my mind. My tipster went on to opine that it sounded like something from the 1960’s. That is because, gentle readers, it IS from the 1960’s.

And our planet’s eco-terrorists good neighbors Monsanto, holds the patent for it.

chemgrass600dpi

Given the amount of environmental abuse this community has experienced— and continues to experience— presently, can we:

  1. Get a park with real grass in it?
  2. And not fill the coffers of a corporation that has no respect for the environment— or people— for that matter?

Then again:

Given the park space in question is the former MTA/Access-A-Ride depot at 65 Commercial Street…


View Larger Map

and contrary to prevailing real estate trends, was sold by our fair city to Clipper Equities…

(the developers behind 77 Commercial Street and its proposed “poor door”) at $8,000,000 (versus the original asking price of $12,000,000 back in 2008).

Should I really be surprised? Outraged (once again), yes! Surprised? No, not in the very least I am sad to say.

175 AMI: Or exactly WHAT constitutes "Low/Moderate/Middle" Income?

I mean, after all, what Greenpoint really needs is affordable housing at 175% AMI. Or at least Clipper Equities does— that way they can pass along the “charitable act” (more specifically its cost) of building this park (which, in return, they get to build a 40 story tower) onto their tenants— all of them.

Let them— or would that be us— eat cake, Astroturf, CHEMGRASS!

The Credulity Files: As Gleaned From Craigslist & The North Brooklyn Community Group

October 25, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11211, 11249, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn, Wow, WTF 

Wellnessburg

If there is one thing yours truly really loves, it is a really good prank. Especially one that makes light of how ridiculous the monetization of our parks has become. CASE IN POINT: the response this solicitation (albeit updated) received on the North Brooklyn Community Group on Facebook.

NBCCG String

New York Shitty Analysis:

  • At a very casual glance I fell for this. After all, I have been suggested to “like” Motherburg,,,

Motherburg

 

  • and I no longer rule out any event as being so ridiculous or totally irrelevant to the community here if it is “artsy”. Or more importantly: garners revenue.
  • By all appearances it would appear other people hereabouts harbor the same mindset. Rather sad, isn’t it?
  • Nonetheless, we harbor it for a reason. Our community’s parks, as few as they are, are being disproportionately monetized for events which cater to people— lots of people— who reside outside the community. More specifically their: capacious wallets. What do we, as citizens, get out of this arrangement? Not much as far as I can tell.
  • In any case props go out to Joe Lentol for actually looking into this. This is what a public servant should do!

Spotted At Java Street Pop-Up Park

October 8, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

Java Street Pop Up ParkNYS

As captured today, October 8th, 2013. Can someone please explain to me exactly what happened here? Anyone? In any case, it does not exactly give a stellar impression of my community to the manifold number of tourists who patronize the East River Ferry (whose pier can be seen in the background).

Spotted On Commercial Street: Space Piracy

September 30, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Wow, WTF 

glasserie2nys

glasserie3nys

glasserie1nys

I know what you’re thinking, gentle readers:

How can this possibly be legal?

It isn’t— but we all know enforcement of rules and regulations (such as those precluding the obstruction of our city’s sidewalks which is what appears to be happening here) are scatter-shot at best. I wonder how a mobility-impaired person is supposed to negotiate this? Anyone?

Quicklink: Oh Boy!

September 30, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11378, Gentrification, Maspeth, Maspeth Queens, Wow, WTF 

screenshot

Holy MARCH operations, Batman! It would appear Maspeth has a problem on its hands— and that problem is the Knockdown Center which, as Queens Crap notes:

  •  A cabaret license for this type of venue is required. None is on file.
  • The current certificate of occupancy is for a factory, therefore having any event open to the public is illegal.
  • Does anyone really believe that in a building with the capacity to hold 5,000, only 600 people will be served alcohol? And at what type of events? There have been drug busts at “raves” in other area factories that have been converted into clubs.  It seems that “up to 600” has been chosen to avoid having to obtain a cabaret liquor permit from the State Liquor Authority (which is different from the city’s required cabaret license).
  • How would 5,000 people even get to Maspeth? Public transportation is lacking. Where will the parking be when the yard is in use (which is often)? And should people be driving around after they have been drinking at a club all night?
  • This venue would no doubt become a trouble spot for the NYPD. The 104th precinct is already stretched way too thin.
  • There are row houses on the same block as the venue and a residential community sits right across the street. When the club-goers start leaving during the wee hours of the morning, they will cause problems for the residents of the area. Complaints have already been received about noise and crowds at this location.

couplenysDid I mention they are also presently selling liquor already? They are— via Roberta’s no less. Please read this entire tome for yourselves, gentle readers.asswithtoiletpaper It is quite something.

In closing I feel compelled to point out what the Knockdown Center proposes is more than a little similar to Studio B— and we all know how well the ensuing shenanigans (as seen at left and right) went over with the neighbors

Good times!

UPDATE, 7:48 p.m.: It would appear the matter of the Knockdown Center has been noticed by the New York Daily News. You can read their coverage by clicking here. Choice excerpt/teaser:

…City Councilwoman Elizabeth Crowley (D-Middle Village), whose district includes other portions of Maspeth, has been the business’s lone champion, saying it will bring much-needed jobs to the community.

“It seems like a good way to revitalize the factory,” said Crowley, who added one of the investors — Gina Argento — also owns Broadway Stages, which employs more than 1,500 people at its Brooklyn site.

“Those are good union jobs,” Crowley said about Broadway Stages. “I have known the owners for a long time. They also do good philanthropic work.”

So why not make this another film facility instead? This would certainly be better than the thirty jobs the Knockdown Center claims it will create if given a liquor license. But there I go using “logic” again…

 

New York Shitty Photo Du Jour: Greetings From The Manhattan Avenue Kayak Launch

September 29, 2013 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Newtown Creek, Wow, WTF 

crabs

This is the “haul” for two fellows, very nice guys both), crabbing on Manhattan Avenue Kayak Launch earlier this evening. As you can probably deduce they are not doing this “for sport”. In other words this is probably tonight’s dinner. Yup…

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